Now things seem to be getting bad. He's a lovely guy and things are normally ok, but it feels like we are going nowhere. He used to get angry and push me or threw things at me, he once pulled my clip in extensions out. He has stopped doing this now for a year but it's made me think. He can be really selfish and he always seems cross when he comes home from work, even if work went well.
I have just met this new guy, he's sweet, sexy and likes me. I have seen him around but i got to know him two weeks ago. I have seen him by chance 3 times since and sparks fly even though we would never do anything (because of the boyfriend)! I get butterflys when i see him and want him around the whole time. What should i do? I don't want to throw a relationship that works for one that doesn't.
2006-06-21 22:23:11 · 24 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I would advise you to get to know the new guy first, become friends with him, and get o know what he is about before any rash judgements are mad. You dont want to drop Mr. Six Years for someone wh might not be interested or may have problems of his own. (Sidebar: DAMN, SIX YEARS AND NO RNG.... SEEK OTHER OPTIONS)
2006-06-21 22:30:01 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
abuse is abuse and sugar it took me 8 years and 7 times leaving to realize that only I could change me. He isn't going to change. Any man with an angry streak has some issues of HIS own to fix. I am sorry to tell you that this is not a 'relationship that works'
I left my guy of 8 yrs all broken hearted and busted up and have now spent 6 months away. They say to never replace a man with another but I was fortunate enough to have a casual friend throughout the years that I turned to and you know what ? After all was done and said we are now more than casual and it is an amazing feeling to be respected and not live in total fear of the next tirade. I don't know you but you deserve better. I say go for the sexy sweet thing tell the temper tantrum dude to back off . It won't be easy and he will cause problems for you but be straight with sexy and he will understand. It is a good wayt o find out how either one of them really feels about you. Most importantly it is a great way for you to find out how you feel about YOURSELF let alone men. I am not man bashing here I dearly loved and always will love my tantrum guy but I couldn't change him. We did the counselling thing, anger management he even went to jail for stuff he did to me and the furniture. IT DOES NOT GET BETTER They say they will and they do but only for a short time
then they go back to their old ways It is called control and it is a desease that cannot be cured MOVE ON TO SEXIER AND SWEETER THINGS Hang on though it will be a rough ride but you can do it
2006-06-22 00:11:28 · answer #2 · answered by kabbit 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've been where you are sweetie, I had to be with a new man before I could see that my old relationship really wasn't working and that I deserved better. Its easy to be blinded when you are in a long term relationship. Your old boyfriend isn't happy and he is taking you for granted. You deserve better!
My suggestion is find the courage to leave you old boyfriend, but don't immediately jump in with the new one ( I did, it helped through the rough patch of the big split but it didn't last ). There will be a rough patch, but then life will be better than ever.
Get your life set up on your own so that you are independent & happy then see where things go with the new guy.
Best of luck.
PS I've had a few other BF since and would never go back to the long term one now. So glad I left! I now have a boyfriend who is positive and fun and who never gets angry and breaks things or shouts at me.
2006-06-21 23:37:29 · answer #3 · answered by SmartBlonde 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im not sure why you think the relationship works even if he's stopped pulling out your hair extensions...why didn't you leave him then? There are alot of guys out there who wont push you or rip things off of you. Maybe your just w/ him b/c you've use to it, b/c its just what you've been doing for soo long, like someone who's been working for the same company for 10 years w/ almost no raise.
And how do you know it won't work w/ this new guy?
Im just saying if you can do even the slightist better then go see. You can at least find someone who doesn't get mad at you for no reason what so ever.
2006-06-21 22:29:44 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like your relationship isn't really working though. I would end it with your current b/f. I don't think you should jump into anything too soon with the other guy though. For one, you need to get your head together and see who you are alone and for another, if your current b/f is the jealous type, he might think something has been going on behind his back, then might take it out on the new guy No matter what, I think you need to end things soon. If your not happy it will go no where.
Good Luck
D*
2006-06-21 22:32:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that's a trial in your relationship, to be involve in a new man. better talk to your bf about things that bothering you, maybe he has a problems that time and you should forgive and forget about it because it was already a year ago and maybe he already realized what he did but if you really don't want to continue the relationship with your bf, still think of it many times because you still don't know the new man you're planning to replace with your bf, what if he can't be the man that will fit more than your current bf right now. better fix your relationship w/ your bf and if you think your love for him fades away and you need a new relationship, you need to break up with him and make a new relationship.
2006-06-21 22:32:14 · answer #6 · answered by babypards 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously your relationship ISN'T working if he was hitting you and pulling your hair out.
Get out of there and show him what you're worth! Even if he has stopped being violent, hes basically just given you a chance to get out ;) Whats to say he wont start again?
Be independent, and independence is an attractive quality..!
2006-06-21 22:28:44 · answer #7 · answered by jellypigs2003 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds to me like the relationship that works would be the new guy and the one that doesn't is the one your in. hello can you say abuse. he probably feels the same way about you. maybe he doesnt want to be with you anymore but doesnt want to throw it away thats why he is cross with you. girl move on and take a chance!!!
2006-06-21 22:28:32 · answer #8 · answered by mrsbeisner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it is time for a break... Or perhaps you should have sex with this other man and see if you are still interested...
You need to assess where you are going in your relationship and the only way is to be a little more adventurous...
2006-06-21 22:32:48 · answer #9 · answered by Forlorn Hope 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Perhaps try and talk to your current boyfriend and see what his problem is. If it can't be resolved, I personally would leave him as I can't imagine the situation will get any better. Then and only then, consider getting to know this other guy better!
Good luck
2006-06-21 22:26:33 · answer #10 · answered by lucyt20 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋