My husband and I are divorcing and have been married for 4 1/2 yrs ( we have been together since we were 12 ( I am 23 now)). He is currently going to have to have shoulder surgery and won't be able to work for 1-2 months. He hasn't worked since March (another story), but said he would find a job in April and he is living with friends, but they will be moving soon so he will need a place to stay. The only reason he is not living with me now is because I am deployed, but will be back soon. Should I let him stay with me untill he recovers and can work to get his own place?
2006-06-21 21:25:41 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Depending on why you're divorcing, you might have to show to the court that you've been physically separated for a year. If he moves back in, that could affect the divorce proceedings.
Normally, I'd say yes, help him out. It's the nice thing to do, but you need to be sure what the consequences are and you're running the risk that he won't go back to work for a while. Really, he should go back to his parents and ask them to help during the recovery. If you let him in, put your agreement in writing and doublecheck with your JAG.
2006-06-21 22:55:45 · answer #1 · answered by scubalady01 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO
You are divorcing.
You are in the military.
Your desire to stand by him is a result of being friends since age 12...his ability to draw on your charity is from the same place.
He's got to take care of his own business now...thats what divorce is about.
He will lose his spousal preferance and sponsorship when the divorce is finalized...once that happens...his presence becomes a hinderance to your career and your social life.
I'm a veteran and currently serve with the military...i see this so often. The end result is, your chain of command will send him on his way without notification if he causes so much as a squeek (ie, traffic violation, medical need, failure to render respect to the flag at retreat,) ...just any potential little thing...makes a huge mess.
he has to find his own way.
No he should not stay with you.
2006-06-21 21:36:01 · answer #2 · answered by Warrior 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's a grown man what happens if next year he breaks his leg are you going to want him to stay with you then to. Start off the right way. Divorce is hard enough with out your ex still so close to you. I would say no and just be up front about it. If he doesn't like it so be it. Life's a ***** with an ex-wife. Good luck and keep your chin up. Be strong.
2006-06-21 21:51:44 · answer #3 · answered by Kat 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. Prior to this, he didn't work and his plans were for the next month to roll around before he would try to find a job. He sounds like he uses too many excuses as to why he can't work and support himself.
2006-06-21 21:38:37 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No. If one or both of you are parting with any hard, or hurt feelings, then I think it's important that you begin new and separate lives. You've been together since you were children, your too used to each other... Things would get weird.
2006-06-21 21:47:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think too many couples quit on marriage too soon. i think with that much history together give it a try and maybe you can rekindle what you lost. sounds exciting. you obviously still care if you would even consider that. go for it. i hope you can make it work and not be another statistic. good luck!!
2006-06-21 21:29:51 · answer #6 · answered by mrsbeisner 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are still his wife you promised to be there in sickness and health. it may be a chance to try to work things out or a chance to be reassured that divorce is the right discion
2006-06-21 21:39:41 · answer #7 · answered by suprren187 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends on why you divorced. If you divorced because you two just weren't meant to be and are still friends why not.
2006-06-21 21:28:07 · answer #8 · answered by Maimee 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it will most likely be a mistake but who knows it could be the start of something carefree and wonderfull to. If there is any doubt at all in your mind then don't do it.
2006-06-21 21:31:18 · answer #9 · answered by status quo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think so. You might not love him anymore, but you can still care for him while he recovers. Just don't let him take advantage of that.
2006-06-21 21:29:26 · answer #10 · answered by Scottie 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋