okay, so i have like one friend. and she always says that we'll hang out and we'll make plans and she says that she'll pick me up and we'll hang out. and then she turns around and invites like 20 other ppl (i'm not exaggerating). and then she'll either a) forget that it started out with just me and her hanging out and she won't call me to tell me what we're planning on doing (and she won't return my calls until the day after we were supposed to hang out because she was "busy") and she doesn't pick me up. or b) she picks me up then ignores me the whole night hanging out with everyone else that she invited.
it's so frustrating!!! plz help!
2006-06-21 14:45:59 · 30 answers · asked by lifeistough_period 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
the thing is, i KNOW that we are friends. coz she always comes to me with her problems, and i do the same with her. and we have alot of fun together when there's not a ton of ppl around. and we act like lil kids and go to the park and stuff. and we have been freinds for 7 years so i kno her pretty well. but when she gets with all her other friends, she all of a sudden starts caring what she looks like and starts acting like a ditz. and it bugs the crap outta me.
2006-06-21 14:54:54 · update #1
she sounds like the type of person that loves to be surrounded by alot of people at one time...what you gotta do is get to know some of the other people around you so that you wont have to depend on only her as a friend...you sound kinda shy so open up and talk to everyone....people really love an outgoing person....youll be really suprised what itll do for you if you open up a little more.... dont be afaid to be a little silly at times too...good luck1
2006-06-21 14:52:55 · answer #1 · answered by too_foolish_to_know_better 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like she doesn't value you as a friend. It also sounds like you are trying too hard to be her friend.
Try this: invite her to do something with you, something that only you and her can do. If she doesn't show up or calls and cancels, then the chances are that she is not really your friend.
I have a feeling she is being influenced by her other friends or she just doesn't value your friendship with her. If this is the case, I say just leave her alone (not break up as friends) and make new friends. If she invites you somewhere, tell her you can't make it, and if you feel impelled to give her a reason why, make up a reason like you have homework, or you have to do chores or whatever. If she has any value for your friendship, she'll start contacting you and become more willing to do what you want to do.
One last thought, she could just not be comfortable hanging out one-on-one and needs a bunch of friends around her.
Bottom line: you teach people how to treat you, so teach them well and they will respect you for it in the long run.
2006-06-21 15:00:39 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would really look at who I call a friend. Friends don't disrespect each other. Friends also give and take in a relationship. Maybe her life is a busy life but I wouldn't let her always use this as an excuse to ignore you. Friends don't just do that. Then again if you are a needy person that needs to be the center of attention her other friends may seem more and more appealing. I guess the best advise I can give you is to talk to her and let her know how you feel. I would also look at myself and see if I was contributing to this type of behavior and maybe even get out a little more. It isn't healthy to just have one person to call a friend. Good Luck!
2006-06-21 14:55:02 · answer #3 · answered by angelsforanimals 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OPTION 1)
Tell her how you feel. Don't tell her to pick you up, tell her you'll pick her up. tell her like the only one day before so she won't have time to invite others. so pick her up, and if it turns out she has invited others, pull her over tell her you said it was supposed to be just you and me, And if she still wants to take the friends, just tell her to take HER friends out HER self. And leave.
OPTION 2)
She just wants to have some fun though, the more the merrier. Why don't you invite some friends along also?
OPTION 3)
well, she doesn't really sound like your friend then. If she asks you to do somethin with her, say ok, just me and you, and then invite along 20 of your friends and ignore her to give her a taste of her own medicene.
OPTION 4)
try making plans with some other friend(s)
OPTION 5)
Simply try talking to her! HOw will she ever know how you feel if you never tell her anything?
2006-06-21 14:54:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she bothers you that much then don't ask her to hang out anymore. And if she is one of your best friends then tell her that she is doing this and tell her to stop, but if she i really your best friend she wouldn't ignore you while she talked to everyone else. I'm guessing this girl is a popular girl, am I right? If I am just try making more friends that will listen to you and treat you better. Which is better being miserable and popular or happy and not as popular? I may be wrong about her being popular but in the end it's up to you.
2006-06-21 14:54:38 · answer #5 · answered by DiMooch 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, you need to sort yourself out. You need to go up to her face (or her house or at school) and tell her how you feel. if she doesnt apologize or respond nicely she is soo not a good friend. is she your only friend? Maybe its time to get a new BFF! You should take time between you and her and wait to see what happens. if she notice doesnt ur gone and seem to miss you then she is not worth anything. if she does do some more friendship tests on her otherwise i suggest meeting a new frined and be friends with them
2006-06-21 14:55:47 · answer #6 · answered by stayyoung 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a sad thought but true, I think you need to find another friend, or maybe more friends to go out with whne you are out wiht her. That way when she disses you, you've got a friend to hang out with and not feel like the 21 wheel. Good luck hun.
2006-06-21 14:50:15 · answer #7 · answered by asoldierswife 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me that she isn't a great friend. My true friends would not pull moves like that. I would stand up for yourself. If she sees she is going to lose you and she is really a true friend, she will wake up and realize it hurts you when she acts in this selfish way.
2006-06-21 14:48:58 · answer #8 · answered by jetskichick25 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry she's not really your shes more like one of those ppl you call "associates" one you jus wave at and say hi and bye 2
2006-06-21 14:55:55 · answer #9 · answered by Tina 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what are you 12 ??
2006-06-21 14:48:02 · answer #10 · answered by JimmyJaan 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋