make me laugh or I'm going to start crying?

Question

i just need a man and a hug thanks for the jokes

Answer 1

Little Leroy came into the kitchen where his mother was making dinner.
His birthday was coming up and he thought this was a good time to tell his mother what he wanted for his birthday.
"Mom, I want a bike for my birthday."
Little Leroy was a bit of a troublemaker. He had gotten into trouble at school and at home.
Leroy's mother asked him if he thought he deserved to get a bike for his birthday.
Little Leroy, of course, thought he did. Leroy's mother, being a Christian woman, wanted him to reflect on his behavior over the last year and write a letter to God and tell him why he deserved a bike for his birthday.
Little Leroy stomped up the steps to his room and sat down to write God a letter.

LETTER 1:
Dear God,
I have been a very good boy this year and I would like a bike for my birthday. I want a red one.
Your friend,
Leroy

Leroy knew this wasn't true. He had not been a very good boy this year, so he tore up the letter and started over.

LETTER 2:
Dear God,
This is your friend Leroy. I have been a pretty good boy this year, and I would like a red bike for my birthday.
Thank you,
Leroy

Leroy knew this wasn't true either. He tore up the letter and started again.

LETTER 3:
Dear God,
I've TRIED to be a good boy this year and I would really like a red bike for my birthday.

Leroy knew he could not send this letter to God either. Leroy was very upset.
He went downstairs and told his mother he wanted to go to church.
Leroy's mother thought her plan had worked because Leroy looked very sad.
"Just be home in time for dinner," his mother said.
Leroy walked down the street to the church and up to the altar. He looked around to see if anyone was there. He picked up a statue of the Virgin Mary. He slipped it under his shirt and ran out of the church, down the street, into his house, and up to his room. He shut the door to his room and sat down with a piece of paper and a pen.

Leroy began to write his letter to God.

LETTER 4:
DEAR GOD, I HAVE YOUR MOTHER.
IF YOU WANT TO SEE HER AGAIN, SEND THE BIKE.
Signed
YOU KNOW WHO

Answer 2

In reality, no one can mAke u laugh. U have to be happy to and feeling good mentally. If u start crying, u can then laugh at what u were crying over.
Laughing, like crying is for our mental well being, it all depends on ur
situation at the time.

Answer 3

Three monkeys go in to a bar and meet with four clowns and the one monkey goes OOOHHHASAAOO and the third clown say I beg your pardon another monkey says AAOOAAOO and the first clown says sir I don't comperhend. Sorry this is just a load of crap but I do want to make you laugh not cry. Just picture me as one of the monkeys and Simon Cowell as one of the clowns.

Answer 4

someone asked me if I was a crayon what color would I be. I said the missing one.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue. God made women and all I got was a I.O.U.

I went to buy a beer and got carded. Not for my age, But to see if anything that ugly could be photographed.

Hope you got a smile out of these.. Oh yeah the first one was for real.

Answer 5

Physically it is very hard to cry and laugh at the same time, it is even harder to chew gum and cry at the same time, if you ever feel like crying pull out a piece of gum.

Answer 6

Once upon a time Mr. Singh go to his neighbourer to take a spare bed for his guests. But his neighbourer refused
He said: sorry' brother I have no spare bed, we have only two beds in our house. On one bed I and my father we both use to sleep, and on the second my wife and my mother used to sleep.
Mr.Singh Answered
My brother its ok, I will arrange the bed from some other place, I have no problem in getting a bed from you,.... But You should sleep in discipline at least..........

Answer 7

So laugh, its a lot easier then crying. plus every time you laugh you give your ears a ride. try it. Put on a big smile and feel what happens to your ears.

Answer 8

I told my husband I needed a new car. I asked him to buy me something that would go from 0 to 200 in less than four minutes, so he bought me a bathroom scale!!!

Answer 9

A little boy was lost at a large shopping mall. He approached a uniformed policeman and said, "I've lost my dad!" The cop asked, "What's he like?" The little boy replied, "Beer and women with big ****."

Answer 10

watch this video, bear with it through the first few minutes until you get to the juicy bits. its about a reporter who cant stop laughing at his guests who have funny voices.

ok, you lot who have seen it before, i know i have posted it before, but it still makes me laugh, and the questioner DID ask, so leave me alone, ok?

http://www.break.com/movies/holditin2.html