What should I do. I have been with him off and on for the last 7yrs but just the two of us for the last 2yrs. He is a great Father to the child that he has right now by someone else. And I treat that child as if she were mine. And now he is telling me that if I have it he will not be apart of the childs life. I am having the baby anyway and taking my chances. Is that fair to my soon to be child?
2006-06-21 11:55:26 · 31 answers · asked by kris 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
he is not being fair to your unborn child. ultimatly the decision is yours, but if he threatens you with leaving maybe it is for the best that you let him go. he will still have to support it.if he didnt want another child HE should have taken percautions...
2006-06-21 11:59:20 · answer #1 · answered by highgamer6969 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This baby is a blessing in disguise, if he is not around for the baby it wont be the first man to walk away or the last, and it doesnt mean your child will grow up without a father. You may just be on the verge of getting a whole new life. A new baby, and away from a man who is irresonsible, selfish and down right cruel. You can be both parents. My mom was. Stay strong. You are doing the right thing. No matter if he leaves or not it would be unfair to the baby to make choices based on your bf because he did not accept responsibility- you still can. I dont want to get your hopes up, but he could change his mind after the baby is born...after he sees him or her.
Its sad how fathers or even mothers can see their chlidren as a problem that happened to their lives instead of them realizing they created their child. Oh I do hope that whatever happens wonderful things will come your way. You will have a precious gift by your side and no mans irresponsibility should persuade you to take that away.
God Bless and be safe!
2006-06-21 19:12:36 · answer #2 · answered by missesbean 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl have your baby, especially if youre fiancially able to. Whats not fair, is for him to put you in a situation where you have to choose between him and your unborn. Now theres alot of other things to take in to consideration, like is your family supportive, are you emotionally ready, and if he does leave can you handle it. Prayer works now and later. If he would leave you behind your decision, he's not a real man, and it's better to know now, then later. You don't need his negativity at all. My father died when I was 9 and my mother raised us as a single parent, no help from no one. There are alot of sucessful single parents out there. Don't let anyone pressure you into having an abortion and especially these strangers who don't know where your heart is. I'm a single parent also, I'm 22 yrs. old, and I'm pregnant. I been raising my daughter on my own, until I met my now fiancee three years ago. And he stepped to the plate; helping a child a thats not biologically his, and me. So good luck, and may GOD be with you.
2006-06-21 19:10:17 · answer #3 · answered by They Love ME......... 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It isn't fair to your child that you have with him but you aren't the one inflicting that unfairness on the baby, the baby's father is. All you can do is give this child all of the love that this child deserves, he/she didn't ask to be born, he/she is innocent in this matter. As for your boyfriend, he is showing his character to you and I think you should ask yourself how much do you value yourself and is he really someone that you want in your life. Also, he will have to pay child support so he isn't going to get away scott-free. It's too late to say what should have been done, all you have is Now. It may be a struggle for you to raise this child alone but anything worth having takes work, and struggle builds character and self-esteem.
2006-06-21 19:21:22 · answer #4 · answered by wannaknow? 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THE NERVE OF HIM!!!!! If you can handle the situation emotionally,physically,mentally,financially,then go ahead. Having a child is a blessing.There are females out here that can't have children at all and would do anything to be in your shoes.You know this man,think long and hard, do whats you feel is right in your heart. Especially if you dont have any of your own at all. The Lord will not put any more on you than you can handle,BELIEVE ME, i was in your shoes 1 year ago,and I decided to have my baby and keep him. God will bless you,and give you the strength you need. Just think about it,that's all.
2006-06-21 19:07:32 · answer #5 · answered by sunshyn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I got pregnant and the father wants no part. I told him I was having the baby anyway. You will be fine raising the child on your own and then just like you stepped in and raised his kid, you will find someone to raise yours. Get papers drawn up and take him to court for child support and get him for everything he's worth. If you have sex, be prepared for responsibility. If you want this baby, keep it and leave him. He will only resent the child.
Good luck.
2006-06-21 19:03:05 · answer #6 · answered by southrntrnzplnt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he is a sorry bastard if he doesn't take an active part of this child's life... bet he had no complaints when he finished!
the fact of the matter is a real man would never say that he will not stay in a relationship with the woman having his child... or deny the child that relationship either. that is WAY wrong. just be encouraged to do what is right for you...
2006-06-21 19:03:20 · answer #7 · answered by spreejo456 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i say do what you feel is right and if he walks you can always still have contact with his other child so they know they are siblings and take him to court for child support... I think he sound like a looser in disguise because he has you raise his other child and doesn't want one with you but he is still the one who didn't use protection .... If in 7 years he's still acting the same way then he just hasn't grown up. and may never...... All thing happen for a reason and can always turn out good. , Good luck with your baby
2006-06-21 19:01:26 · answer #8 · answered by manda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i was in the same situation 12 years ago. i was with this guy who happened to have a girl pregnant before we got together. Then ,I got pregnant and he threatened me and told me he would hurt me and the baby. I regret the decision I made that month to abort my child. i will regret it for the rest of my life. I will never let a human make me commit murder again.
Do what is right, choose life. It's not the child 's fault for coming into this world. How would he feel if his other child's mother aborted his first child.
2006-06-21 19:01:56 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
girl u been with him that long and he still is just a b/f. you must know he aint worth it. have the baby . babies are more important then a man. he was just a donar it takes more then sperm to be a daddy. You better off with out him let him leave but he probaly just saying that cause he figure it would make u get rid the baby. which is sick way to try to control someone. Any man that would try to say that he goes or his kid goes needs to be put out and he also needs a good butt kicking but hey. You can do so much better even if you dated a puppy next lol
2006-06-22 07:12:05 · answer #10 · answered by Priceless 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wether he has both a mother and father figure at the moment is hard to say. But its best that if the father leaves, just do your best as a mother, and if someone happens to come along and help this child out and be a father figure, let it be, you sound like a good person, just be good to your child as I see you already are:). Just keep it up.
2006-06-21 19:01:19 · answer #11 · answered by No Worries 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋