I'm not coming from any religious standpoint, but WHY do people think its alright to divorce when there are children between the two people? I mean, if theres abuse involved, thats one thing, but parents tearing apart a family because theyre "unhappy" does NOT seem okay. It is SO much harder for the kid to grow up with one parent. All the people i know with two parents turn out so much happier (usually) than those of us raised by one parent. Who disagrees with me? Why?
2006-06-21 10:12:18 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Obvioulsy you are not on an unhappy marriage.
Divorce is ok because there is no point in being miserable everyday until the day you die. Children are happier when they don't have to live with the constant arguing and the bitterness and resentment of unhappy parents that hate each other.
I disagree whith you about children that have both parents have are happier. I grew up seeing my father cheating on my mother, ther argued everyday and made me feel as if I was the reason of ther discontentment. I often served as the "referee" in their arguments and have no happy memories of my family at all. That has screwd me up completly as an adult beacuse you get used to the drama and don't know what normal is.
My parents never divorced and that didn't make me any happier. I wish they ended that miserable marriage so I could have a normal enviroment to grow up with. After years of therapy I still struggle with this... DIVORCE is ok because children should not live in the house of hell. I probally would be happier living with my grannie away from my parents daily ration of bitterness, guilt-trips and misery.
Children of divorced parents can be happy and well adjusted and have their fair share of both parents, without all the arguing and the drama. They can both spend time with the kids and be happy, which translates to the kids...
2006-06-21 10:21:15 · answer #1 · answered by Blunt 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Its not necessarily ok, but sometimes, its the only option. My ex and I were convenient for one another and got married after only dating for 3 months. Obviously, there were gonna be problems. We had 2 kids together and both of us were really unhappy. We didn't fight much, but we also had nothing to say to one another - the only time either of us were happy was when we were out with our friends. So, one day, 6 months after our youngest was born, we decided to go our separate ways.
Today, he is one of my best friends and the girls have 2 happy parents, both in relationships with other people. Even though we are divorced, our girls are still raised by 2 parents, 1 in each household, who get along very well and are able to talk about anything concerning them.
I know not all divorces have this kind of "happy ending", but we did and we are both much better off separate than we were together.
2006-06-21 10:50:56 · answer #2 · answered by thersa33 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's interesting that people think that divorce is easy. Having been there, divorce was the hardest thing I have been through in my life. I went through a lot of soul searching and cried for years after with feelings of failure and guilt and I DIDN'T have any children. Life is different than it was in my grandmothers and my mothers day, I don't support the statement that people tried harder. People tried and then if it didn't get better, they had no option. They just lived day to day, unhappily - they may not have talked about it. My grandmother would have divorced had she not felt that she would have been ostrasized by everyone. One thing I have learned about getting older is the phrase "don't judge a person until you've walked a mile in their shoes" is universally applicable.
2006-06-21 10:57:44 · answer #3 · answered by beenthere 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Mandi, divorce is not ok. Society has allowed divorce to be ok. People do not keep their promises when the say their vows. It is an honorable trait which was upheld to be married past 20 years. Now, it seems that when 20 years comes around, people are having second thoughts.
2006-06-21 10:21:46 · answer #4 · answered by icemountian8 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I see what your saying but I also think if you spouse is unfaithful why are you going to be it the children will understand I was raise by my mom and she work hard to give us what we need it but she did it. And I'm doing good but I also stand for both parents its better I know I wish that I had a father most of the time
2006-06-21 10:31:27 · answer #5 · answered by HONEY 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Think about like this: do you want your children to grow up thinking that they have to settle for being unhappy just because of their kids? I know I wouldn't, children know so much more than we think and they know when we are not happy. Sometimes ppl are just better off not together.
2006-06-21 11:05:54 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Jennifer♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I actually aggree with you. Divorce has become way too easy; it's almost like trading in a car because it needs an oilchange.
Sadly, our global society has become one of instant gratification, instead of one that teaches morals and standards.
There are times when it is neccesary to divorce, it's even provided for in the old testament of the bible, but it's just too easy now.
2006-06-21 10:31:38 · answer #7 · answered by stratplayer1967 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's alright if your really having troubles that arent just temporary and it makes the whole family unhappy or if its a abusive relationship. But if its just a couple fights then no, thats not okay.
hope that answered your question...
2006-06-21 10:17:15 · answer #8 · answered by nooooooooooooooooooooooo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋