When people say "Be yourself," does that mean you can't improve your personality for the better?

Question

Like in my previous question, I asked "What are some tips to become charming?" and people answered to be yourself. Isn't it better to change yourself for the better, like making yourself calm instead of your natural angry disposition? What if you have a really bad personality? Should you change it or just continue to "be yourself" so no one will want to be around you?

Answer 1

No, when people say be yourself it means don't intentionally try to change your personality, likes, etc to please someone else or to fit in.

This is different that changing traits that you don't like about yourself. Such as, I used to be really stubborn, so I changed to be more relaxed and easy going. I am still the same person in terms of my personality, I just changed the trait that was negative. I am still myself and still have the same humor, likes, other traits.

I think maybe if someone doesn't want to be around you, it may have to do with your mood. If it has to do with a certain trait such as being rude, then yes, maybe this is something you shoudl change. But don't change your entire personality just to fit in to a group.

Answer 2

You are free to try changing yourself, but "being yourself" means that every change you do will be your own choice and your own decision.

Answer 3

good one. charm is a trait that you're not born with. it's really base upon how smooth you can be with conversation, manner and etiquette. good personality has nothing to do with it. but it helps to get along with others