Is it true that shy kids remain shy as adults, and talkative kids remain outgoing and successful as adults?

Question

My case is super shy as a kid.. all the way up to now, as an adult i'm shy and lack social skills and having problems with employment. While recently i met a guy who was with me in elementary school. he was social as a kid, and now he is social and suceesful as a manager for a store. so is it just destiny?
i mean i didn't plan to be this failure that i am now. but i am

Answer 1

Certain habits tend to stay with us. Social interaction is a big one. On the other hand, you can make changes to your own life. The more traffic you have with people, the better able you may be to fit in, and be more successful (also, success breeds success!). As a shy person in good standing myself, I have learned how to live in the world. I have only a few close friends, but they are strong. I have a number of good "acquaintances." Try for a level where you are comfortable. Also, try to be the best you can be (excellence, not perfection). If you know what you are doing, people will eventually notice (most of the time, anyway). You are NOT a failure until you quit trying!

Answer 2

No it is not always true. My son when he was little was extremely shy. He had a head full of beautifully curls that would attract every stranger anywhere we went in public. The poor kid would run and hide.

Then when he was about halfway thru kindergarten the flood gates were let loose and he hasn't stopped. The teacher said that she sees this sometimes were they finally come out of their shell and have to make up for lost time. He's 10 now and I swear he now knows everyone we run into. We've been at the store and he will say "hi Mike" to some strange guy and I'll be like whose that honey and he'll say oh that's one of the guys that put the new roof on the house two blocks down the street or that's the guy who was painting the fire hydrants last week.

I do think you can unlearn it. Expecially after you have been around a few positive people who make you feel as tho they have your back. I was shy when I was younger but then after I worked in a few places with some good self assured bosses I learned how to take charge and not question myself everytime.

Answer 3

It depends I guess, but yeah, I was shy as a child and now am pretty shy as an adult. I wouldn't say this has had any effect on my "success" though. For instance, I'm one of the only kids I went to high school with that went on to college, and I know the major reason was because I didn't socialize with those more outgoing types and get involved with alcohol, drugs etc. It can be a blessing in disguise.

Answer 4

I know it seems that I answered like two of your questions here. However, I have to say I grew up as a kid away from my parents and not to many friends not all introverts are doomed to be a failure. I my self was shy too, however I developed my own social skills by learning from others that I watched over the years, since then my circle of friends have grown to many and some are international friends. So, to answer your question; no, not all of shy kids remains a shy adults.

Answer 5

No it isn't true at all. I used to be severly shy as a child. I wouldn't talk to anyone except my family. I wouldn't even order my own food at a restaurant or buy my own stuff at stores because I was too shy to talk to the cashiers. My sister was just as bad. They had to put her back a year because she was so shy that she wouldn't participate in class or talk to the teachers. My cousin used to be really outgoing and wouldnt shut up when she was a kid and now that she is an adult I cant get her to talk much. When I went to a funeral not long ago she hardly talked and I did all of the talking lol. Just because you are one way as a kid doesnt mean you will stay that way. People change over time.

Answer 6

First thing is that just because you are shy, does not mean in anyway that you are a failure.

I was shy as a child. I would hang on to my mom's pant leg whenever she wanted me to meet someone. Then as I became an adult, I became more social and also worked in retail, which you have to be social to do. When I was in my mid to late 20's, I was in an abusive relationship (not in that one anymore) and now am shy again. Although, I did go back to school when I was 34, I am not in retail anymore. I am now a recepionist, but I only deal with people over the phone and still have a problem with social events. I try to get out of them if I can.

So, I guess the answer to your question is I just think it depends on what happens in your life. Only you can make things happen if you want them bad enough.

I hope this helps.

Answer 7

No not all true, take my older sister for example...i remember she was teh biggest loser. But now she is one of the most successful lawyers out there. I was and always have been the social/popular kid and I'll be a freshmen at Yale University this fall. So i dont think being shy or being more social has nothing to do with how well you do in life.

Answer 8

No, it isn't destiny although it's not uncommon. Shy kids can grow up to be non-shy adults, and that is more likely to happen than a non-shy kid maturing into a shy adult. Even a shy adult can change themselves, if they have enough desire to do so. If you don't want to be a failure, then don't be. But simply being a shy person doesn't = failure. I'm a shy gal, I know.

Answer 9

No, it's not true. I was a very outgoing kid, and my boyfriend was very quiet and shy, and now he's the outgoing one and I'm the one who can't speak well to people I don't know. How shy you are as an adult depends on far more factors than just how you were as a child.

Answer 10

I dont think they are destined to be that way at all. When I was a little kid, I was really shy and never talked unless spoken to, and I lived a life of akward silences. I did amazing in school because it was the only thing I could apply my attention to, and I had hardly any friends. One day I looked around and realized it was my mental attitude that kept me from what I wanted and I changed. It was hard, but now, I am a really bubbly fun person that is always the center of fun. Me and my best friend have been thought to be drunk at times, but we are just high on life. Its just the way I made myself and now I am so much happier.