Im 24,im different from my friends.My guy & me should be bestfriends first confidantes,my guy shouldnt be changed by me as hes man i fell in love with,he needs to have his friends which he had before i came into picture,he shouldnt be spied,checked upon,he should go out with his friends.He can talk to his friends(girls)who he knew before marriage as i have no problem with it since i trust him.I give my guy space.But my friends say im wrong & if i am this way after marriage it will fail.What do you think?
2006-06-20 12:17:45 · 45 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
YOU WILL BE THE BEST DAUGHTER TO YOUR PARENTS,BEST WIFE TO YOUR HUSBAND,BEST MOTHER TO YOUR CHILDREN its very good u have decided to keep ur family friends relatives out of ur marriage in future MARRIAGE SHOULD BE ONLY U AND HIM
2006-06-21 04:53:09 · answer #1 · answered by docfreudianslip 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Woman was not taken from the man's head for him to lord over; neither was she taken from his foot for him to kick around, she was taken from his side to become his partner and helper. Neither was a woman made to fulfill the selfish desires of a man. A marriage was not geared to carry out a program for the husband's happiness alone. Neither one should live selfishly or be superior to the other.
It"s a well known fact that a woman can take alot from her man, but no woman can tolerate complete indifference. What I'm trying to say is when two people marry they share the same space, and when one of the partners leave the space frequently, to go where the other partner doesn't know about, it can make for murky waters in the near future.
Consider the day you were married, you gave yourself completely, freely, and forever to your husband, with no reservations and no secret alliances with old associates. Before the marriage, both of you came and went pretty much as you pleased, considering mainly your own desires. But it's different now! His time is not entirely his own,as well it should not be. It's not a question of old friends, but of how much he considers you, his wife. When a couple start taking each other for granted, breakdown occurs, sooner or later.
2006-06-20 19:16:06 · answer #2 · answered by trieghtonhere 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not wrong. Just because people get married or have a relationship, it doesn't mean that they can no longer maintain other friendships. Trust and mutual respect are the cornerstones of a marriage. If you have those things, chances sre you'll do just fine. By the way, what would your friends say if your man told you that you couldn't hang with THEM anymore? They can't stand on both sides of the fence. Treat your man the way you want to be treated!
2006-06-20 12:26:33 · answer #3 · answered by shellb7088 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
They are wrong and you are right, cause if you do all those stuff to your husband then that means that you really dont have any faith in him or your marriage. Couples need freedom from each other once in a while and when they dont feel like being around their spouse, they should feel free to go out with their friends who they knew before you came into the picture. Nobody should change their friendships cause they are dating someone or married. Only a controlling person would do that who feels as if their mate goes out, they will cheat on them. If you know your husbands friends (male & female) you shouldnt have no problem with him goin out with them. tell your friends that you trust your husbands, cause it sounds like they dont trust their spouses to go out with anyone besides them.
2006-06-21 04:30:31 · answer #4 · answered by baby_luv 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
answer this question for me, are any of your friends married? i'm guessing not. When you are in a comitted relationship, you should trust your partner. Why are you with someone that you do not trust? its like the law, you are inocent until proven guilty. You are doing the right thing, if you trust him then trust him but if you son't then save yourself the headache and leave. Staying with someone that you don't trust is just going to stress you out more. Be your own person, think on your own don't let your friends think for you!! Good Luck!
2006-06-21 04:30:57 · answer #5 · answered by anw110784 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you sincerely trust your man, fine. If he gives you equal trust and freedom, fine. But you're sounding a little programmed to me. A little brain-washed. It sounds like your man may have imposed these views on you. However, if this is really the way you feel than don't worry about what your friends say.
2006-06-21 02:17:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think that to much space can cause another to go astray and too much locking him inside can do the same.
my fiance still sees his friends before he knew me only i'm there with him, if they invite him out for a boys night out then i let him go, he shouldnt be locked in the house. same goes for me.
if he is always going out with his friends and never invites u to come along then i would see that as a prblem because why wouldnt he want me to become friends with his friends.
dont worry about your friends and what they say.
they are only trying to protect you but i would talk to my fiance about it. if u are worried that he doesnt want you around his friends ask him why. if u feel you are giving him too much space do more things as the two of you, have more "alone" time. hope that helped a little.
2006-06-20 18:17:43 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think your friends are wrong...although you're married and have that special bonds, you both still need to be individuals and do your own things...it's healthy for a relationship...if you trust each other then there are little to no problems...Trust is the foundation of every relationship
2006-06-21 04:28:11 · answer #8 · answered by Maestro 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I envy you!!!! Most women are extremely insecure!!! You need to stay the way you are and just let your friends know YOU are doing what YOU feel is right!!! If your marriage fails I will be TOTALLY shocked!! This guy caught a good one and if he throws it away he is a JERK anyway!!!! You are awesome and keep up the excellent job!!! Maybe get into teaching relationship classes!!!!
2006-06-21 04:27:21 · answer #9 · answered by MNM0103 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No my dear girl,you are not wrong.Mutual respect,trust and love are pretty much all you need. In my opinion these are the things that hold a marriage together.You sound like a very smart girl and your man should be proud of you.Good luck to you and your man and a long and happy life together.............Karen r
2006-06-20 12:29:51 · answer #10 · answered by kopesetic 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some space in a marriage is good, but too much space can lead to disaster. It is good for him to hang with his friends, but not too much, especially not with the females from before. Its good that you trust him, but not stretch that trust too far, he may take advantage of if. Always keep you ears, eyes and nose open!
2006-06-20 12:23:08 · answer #11 · answered by carmelbrown2001 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋