She only goes to sleep when I am breastfeeding her, and once I put her down she crys. She crys to for her night sleeps. I want her to have regular naps, but I feel so bad to let her cry too long, I don't want her to grow up insecure. What do I do? Help... MOther...
2006-06-20 10:47:54 · 20 answers · asked by Joey L 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
That is normal. She is telling you she loves youl.
Crying alone is *not* good for babies--even "just a little bit". A crying baby produces cortisol (a stress hormone), even after she stops crying. Calories she needs to growth and development will instead be used for stress management--it's like taking food right out of her mouth! It also gives her the message that when she is totally dependent, the people who love her the most won't help her.
If she won't let you put her down when she falls asleep, there are two options. Either don't put her down, or put her down *then* get her to sleep.
Do you have a baby sling? You can nurse in a sling, then carry her around while you do things and she sleeps. The motion will even help her sleep. This is the best option most of the time for daytime naps; babies need lots of touching in order to develop!!
For those occasions when this is *not* possible, try the following instead. Lie down with her. Nurse her to sleep--until she releases the breast. Wait 5-10 minutes until she is in a deeper stage of sleep. Get up very gradually without jarring the bed. Stay in the same room as her for as long as she is asleep. At night, just sleep next to her instead of trying to put her in another bed or another room.
2006-06-20 23:52:13 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I hear you loud and clear. I went thought the same thing with my daughter!!!! I found that after she ate and I put down the the crying was more than I could handle....BUT then I found that her nap time was a great time to take a shower and/or wash my car water my lawn. Sit out on the front steps and talk on the phone. The shower was the best...I felt like if there was anything to bad happened I was right there. Soon she realized that she was not going to die and she was good for a good 2 hour nap. The more that she cried the longer she slept. I think it taught her that she could sooth her self to sleep. I feel for you. Just remember it is just a phase. She will live.
2006-06-20 17:54:57 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Getting into that habit is bad for you and bad for your baby! Your baby, whether you know it or not ...knows that by crying she will get you to come back to her and surrender to her crying by taking her out of the crib.
She has you wraped around her tiny little finger.
Don't feel bad that your baby crys when you put her down for a nap ...most baby's do this ...but you need to assert your role as the one who makes the decisions. So when it's nap time, that means it's nap time, and your baby knows that. The first couple times might be difficult, especially to leave her crying but that's what you have to do, in order to break the bad cycle you got yourself in with your child.
Leaveing her in her crib ....crying will not make her insecure. At all!! I don't know where you heard that but that's simply not true.
Baby's need training like a pet, although both are completely different, still some of the same rules apply when it comes to asserting your role as the mother and not the doormat.
Regardless ...your baby, even though she is young, knows that you react to certain actions by her a certain, and often a consistent way. Be Aware of that!!!!
2006-06-20 18:46:24 · answer #3 · answered by Blondie* 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Babies don't understand the concept of a schedule, unless you teach them.
Let your baby cry. Wait a good 10-15 minutes at least, unless there actually seems to be something wrong with the baby. Eventually, the baby will remember that you put them to sleep at this time every day. They will cry less and less.
If you go to your baby every time they cry when they go to bed, they will have control over you (dare I say get spoiled). You need structure to stay sane and have time for yourself.
Babies cry, because they can't talk. As an example: If they are saying "Mommy I don't want to sleep", then your reaction should be "Sorry, It's time for bed".
2006-06-20 17:54:52 · answer #4 · answered by jencanadian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As mean as it sounds let them cry. At first he may cry for an hour, but eventually they will lay right down and go to sleep. It only took my daughter 6 nights. She is 5 and has been sleeping all night long since she was 6 months. Go some where in the house where you will not be able to hear him cry though...it's natural to want to go get them.
2006-06-20 17:53:30 · answer #5 · answered by Cateyes77 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reason she cries so much is because you hold her too much, unless you want her to be a spoiled little brat you had better learn to leave her alone when she is crying and let her learn to sleep on her own. She knows that if she cries you are going to run and pick her up, she wants the attention. Put her in her crib, close the door and let her cry herself to sleep, after a few times she will realize that you will not always run to her and she will stop. I know that it is hard, but you have to teach her while she is still young.
2006-06-20 17:53:08 · answer #6 · answered by Beauty&Brains 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Let her CIO! She's 9 months old, by now you should know her cries and what they mean momma. She's playing you, she has your card and you are LOSING. Put the baby down and step away from the baby...let her cry, once she tires of it, she'll go to sleep. Hopefully by now you'd know if she was sick or hurting...if not I'd play closer attention. I have three girls and they are 8,5 and 3 and I let them CIO from 2 months old on, and they sleep wonderfully. They've been on the same schedule since they were babies, and they are all different, so that crap about them all being different and it not working is a bunch of BULL. It's what you are willing to put up with and do, if you're not willing to let her learn to put herself to sleep after you feed her and rock her and all that other good bedtime stuff, then it's your fault, blame yourself. Good luck!
2006-06-20 20:18:11 · answer #7 · answered by dixi 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My son is 7 months and the same way. Everyone tells me to let him cry it out & he'll learn to sleep on his own after a few days. I haven't been able to do it yet. My daughter was the opposite & always went to sleep on her own. I wish you luck because I think the crying thing is gonna be the only way we can break this bad habit. Maybe I'll give it a try tonight...or not. LOL
2006-06-20 17:53:56 · answer #8 · answered by jillie76 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I put my 9 month down with a bottle. it makes him sleep harder and longer, but since you are breast feeding you dont have the luxury of taking the easy way out. What I would reccommend is maybe pumping your breast and giving her the bottle when it is time for bed. And at this age she wont have any nipple confusion. That stage is long over with. If you are anti-pump you can also try to give her a pacifier with a little karo syurp on it. She will want to suck on it becuase it is sweet and hopefully she'll stay asleep. Try giving her something to be distracted by also. Maybe put her to bed with a music box playing or the music on the tv. She'll have something to listen to, to make her fall asleep and also not think of crying.
Good luck.
2006-06-20 17:51:29 · answer #9 · answered by Amy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When my girls were babies if they would not go to sleep I would lay down beside them and softly rub their forhead and back until I knew they were asleep and then I would take a nap too. Also, play some soft lullabies with sounds of mothrs heart beat in the background. Hope this helps.
2006-06-20 17:52:49 · answer #10 · answered by purpletaffy50 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋