Why are people, specifically teens, so catty and cruel to one another?

Question

Alright, so I have had plenty of opportunity to watch people treat eachother just horribly, and I just HATE it. So now, I'm trying to understand why! Does anyone have any insight as to why people are so mean to eachother? I mean, I know someone is going to tell me they do it to make themselves feel better, but do people really feel better because they tell someone else they're ugly? Does that really give them a sense of superiority? I really want answers here, if you've ever been a bully of some type, or watched other people be bullied, or have been bullied, do you know why? Because maybe, if I understand why, I'd be better at stopping it! Its the one thing about the world I'll never completely get...why people feel the need to be mean to eachother, when they can make another person's day so great, just by being nice!

Answer 1

It's really just a societal thing. Human beings, like all other animals, compete with other individuals in their species for dominance. The most dominant individuals in a social grouping will usually have the most resources available to them as a result of other individuals' subservience to them. Historically, this is most relevent for mating purposes, and in the case of teenagers, with hormones running as rampant as they ever will be, the cattiness and cruelty are really just status elevators that serve not as much to make the individual feel better, but to display dominance to those to whom they're being cruel. Sadly, I don't think this is anything likely to change. Popularity contests are as old as time, and an instinctual genetic feature of being alive. If it helps, think of all of those movies and tv shows where the most popular (and usually the most catty and cruel) individuals end up worse off in the long run, and leading unhappy, unfulfilled lives because they never learned to try to build points with people instead of trying to steal them away from others.

Answer 2

It is human nature, and immaturity on the part of teens. It is in the make-up of a human being to want to feel better in some way or to stand out for whatever reason. Everyone will go through this, on both sides of the fence in thier lifetime. In some ways it is a good thing as it can show you things about yourself that need change. Sometimes shaming sombody works that way. Other times the cruelty of on eindividual can grow into a whole movement. Which can also be a good or bad thing. If treated cruelly you learn how it feels and hopefully will be more understanding when the next such opportunity rears its ugly face at you. Humans are frail it takes time to realize. Other humans are born bullies, usually because fo thier own insecurities. Teasing some one else takes the attention off them and so on. Try to be a good person all the time. My grandmother told me you never know who you meet and if they will be the one to save your life around the next corner. Hope this helps, S.

Answer 3

I don't think there is an easy answer for this. Keep in mind that folks are a product of their surroundings. In many instances, it may jut be as simple as "upbringing". It may also be an underlying need for attention. Even negative attention is attention. With Teens, specifically, you need to remember that they are going through a great deal of change emotionally, physcially, and chemically. In any situation, the best remedy I've found is not to reciprocate, but to either ignore it or toss a complement out there. How cruel to look at someone who says, "You are ugly". and reply with, "Only next to you." Kindness can have a profound effect.

Answer 4

I'm a teen. Teens brains aren't fully developed until they're 30, that's why teens get in more car accidents than adults. I think if someone calls you ugly, the natural tendency is to retaliate and make fun of them. That's pretty much all I know about it. I don't know however why if someone has never done anything to you, feels the urge to make fun of your appearance, intelligence, etc.

Answer 5

I initially wanted to give a goofy answer.Then I read further down your letter.My opinion,people ridicule,put down,insult is because of their own fears and insecurities.That may not sound like what you need to hear.Theirs nothing wrong with you.If someone says so its their problem not yours.Sensitive people are often the targets for such redicule as they are seen as weak and vulnerable.The animal side of our nature says to be strong.Often its at someone elses expense.If you encounter a million mean people,one nice caring person can offset all that.Look for those people.They can be tricky to find at times,but they are out ther.Have a great day.

Answer 6

To paraphrase the victim's Dad's words on, I believe, NBC or Fox's morning show, this is what happens when we have taken God out of our schools and parenting out of the hands of parents. Whether you agree with him or not, he has definitely hit a nerve and very sad commentary on today's society. Ever since the liberal crowd started to push their PC/tolerance/do-as-you-please and other similarly wacko ideology/poison onto and into our society, we have more and more people, especially the younger generations, who no longer knows or cares what is right or wrong or black and white because everything is in various shades and tints of grey to them. If these attackers, because their parents took the time and care to teach and discipline them when they were much younger, had consequences hunting them in the back of their minds and righteousness knocking in the front of their minds, I can guarantee that the chances for this incident to happen would have been almost next to zero. Yet, today's society continues to jeer at those of us who still holds up the banner for family values, morality and righteousness and calls us old-school. What is right may not be popular and what is popular may not be right. Find me some of the poorest countries in the world and I will show you that some of that country's problems have direct links to the deplorable state of the family in that country. If we don't watch it, we are heading in that direction.

Answer 7

Because most of them are still immature. Or maybe their parents are spoiling them too much.

But not all of them grow up that way, some of them outgrow being cruel and mean. It's usually after highschool that they get rid of this kind of attitude. Because then they realize that they're not the center of the universe.

Answer 8

intimidation my dear. those who bully others feel that know one will ever bother them. it is maring their territory. it is also a sense of control on the other person. there are many diff reasons to bully a person. if u look at society as a whole even governments. they bully smaller countries and kill those people just for not thinking the same way they do. do u understand this is all about territory. the queen bee so to speak.

Answer 9

Immaturity and insecurity. You can only change your reaction not what other people do. Have you ever read the book the four agrements by Ruiz. Excellent book. There is a chapter in there about taking things personal. You should read it.

Answer 10

territory. it's a natural instinct to raise oneself up by putting others down. usually people who behave this way have low self esteem. unfortunately, it actually works. those who can attain the highest status by putting others down usually reap financial and social rewards. it's a sick world.

a small percentage of people are sociopaths, and have no capacity to sympathize, to have compasion, or to understand the world from another's perspective. these people often end up in prison... or politics.