I am married and I received mine and my husbands cell bill. I was looking through it just to see the usage and a number caught my eye. The number was a girls number that he works with and there were like 30 or more outgoing and incoming texts between my hubby and her. I asked him about it and he said that they can't always talk at work so they text "as friends". I have never really liked her, abd now I don't know what to think. Oh yeah and he is now not talking to me cuz he got mad at me for asking him.
2006-06-20 06:35:57 · 75 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
He's not necessarily cheating, just look for more signs instead of jumping to conclusions. Men hate being confronted about things, even if they aren't true, so they get defensive and angry. Just look for more signs b/c maybe they are just friends and you may be making more of it. You can't base a relationship off text messages because some messages can be one word or 2. Sit down and seriously talk to him if you suspect something after you've done some investigating and have more to go off of.
I know what you're going through.
2006-06-20 06:41:43 · answer #1 · answered by sparklingsatine04 2 · 6⤊ 0⤋
Well, he shouldnt have been mad for asking. You're just making sure everything is ok. He needs to be a bit more understanding. You dont like her and now he has a lot of texts to/from her...he should take that into consideration and not be mean.
Do you know what the texts said?
Im the type of person that would be a lil jealous and upset. and if he got mad at me for asking, i would be even more jealous and upset. That would make me think more is going on.
Has he ever done anything like this before? Ever cheated on you? Have you 2 been arguing more lately?
Give him the benefit of the doubt (at least for now until you find out more) Ask him if you 2 can talk about it, tell him how so many of those texts makes you feel. Communication is the key to every relationship.
2006-06-20 06:41:54 · answer #2 · answered by da_nikkster 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For the moment I would let it go. I'll apologize. After a week or two I would strick up a conversation about "feelings" of the text messaging and telephone conversations. Do not argue just listen. Digest everything that is being said and keep your eyes and ears open regarding future happenings between the two. There is an olds wives tale (aka a scripture) that says .... what happens in the dark will eventually be revealed in the light. Stay strong, limit your conversations with 'others' regarding this issue and be patient.
2006-06-20 06:47:16 · answer #3 · answered by chaaqarah 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He might be cheating on you and is projecting his feelings of guilt onto you as anger. Keep an eye out for perfume smells that are not yours...his interest in new things, renewed interest in his looks/physique, and "late nights at the office." Don't let him suspect anything because then he will just try harder at concealing it. If he says he's going to the bar with friends, call those friends or their wives and see if that is true...talk to some of his colleagues, see if he really is working all those late hours...check up on her too...if you are really balsy, you can call her and make up some lie about calling for your husband and then see what she says..idk, something that would make sense, since I don't know what your husband does for work, I can't really give you a good example. Just watch for details, listen carefully to him speak, and when you hear something you can use, write it down and don't forget it. Check the credit card bills, request a bank statement, and if all else fails, bug his office and car
2006-06-20 06:41:38 · answer #4 · answered by violet1656 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Turn it around. Explain how a woman's mind works. (Even if you don't believe it.) Reassure him that you know that he would never break the sacred vows he made. You trust him completely. (If you said something to the contrary before this would be the time to say sorry about that.) Then go into how you don't trust her. Put him in your position. Ask him what he would think if he saw a guys number numerous times texting you. (If he said he wouldn't care because he trusted you make sure to tell him again this isn't about him but the person who is texting him.)
This then gives him a chance to be honest. You gave a little and now he can give a little.
2006-06-20 06:44:34 · answer #5 · answered by Rev Mel 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me, as a guy, who texts, and has been in this same exact situation. He is being a bad boy. How bad is up in the air. But he wouldn't get mad unless...
I will say this: guys are naturally gonna want to spread their seed. Its in their genetic make-up. So while you can be mad or hate him for it, maybe you can also understand him just a little. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you, at all. Also, she knows he is married, so she is probably more at fault than him. Women are almost as bad, if not worse than men. It's not her fault either, as its in a women's genetic make-up to seek out a good man for daddy purposes. Even though she might be ruining the very thing she wishes to acquire, somehow it makes sense to her anyway. You, unfortunately, are caught in the middle! Good luck.
Talk about it, and let him know you want the truth, and that it's OK to tell you. Personally, if my wife cheated, I would rather her tell me about it than keep it a secret. I would even forgive her if she told me, but probably wouldn't forgive her if I found out any other way.
2006-06-20 06:46:03 · answer #6 · answered by C P R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
HUGE RED FLAG!!! They are definitely doing some flirting on the text mssg. The fact that your husband got mad means something is up!! If it was all innocent - he wouldn't have cared about you knowing about it. U guys need to talk this out and SOON before he gets physical with her. And without his knowledge, I would contact the cell phone company to see if it is possible to get a listing of what was said on those text mssgs - some companies have websites where you can view them! Anyways, do that research yourself and then confront him with it. In the meantime, I would watch him like a hawk - that is a sure sign something is going on!!!! Hope it works out!
2006-06-20 07:04:53 · answer #7 · answered by caramelqueen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well U got alot of answers....... N-e-ways...... U could do alot of thing, my husband did the same thing to me and i never really found out what had happened..... but I didn't like the feeling if i could go back and change something i would put an ultimatum, Let him know that u don't like it and if he don't stop u'r gone, If he really loves u He'll understand and he'll stop but if there is something going on then he'll get mad and he wont.... If he accept make sure to change the number on the cells that way she does have his new # and they wont talk unless they are working that is something u cant stop!!! unless u make him change jobs to... but that will be hard....... e-mail me if u want o chat do it threw my (profile)
GOOD LUCK
2006-06-20 07:02:09 · answer #8 · answered by •°♥Ms. SeXy♥°• 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He needs to cut it out. It's not right, if you don't think it's right. He wouldn't like it if the shoe was on the other foot. If he is not having an affair with her already, he is on his way to one. He has no reason to be mad at you other than deflect blame from him. If you have cingular you can check past bills online to see how long this has been going on for. Some of the other service providers will allow you to do this as well online. See if there are phone calls too.
2006-06-20 06:40:57 · answer #9 · answered by Tunasandwich 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is mad because he got busted!! Why dont you text this girl and ask her why she texts your husband so much, if HE mentions it to you, then you'll know that what your gut tells you is true. If the whole situation was just a work related thing, there would be no reason for him to be mad and then to ignore you, he would have handled it completely diff and would have reassured you that it was no big deal.
We women were born with special instincts, use yours!!
2006-06-20 06:56:29 · answer #10 · answered by Katz 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋