They are separated because he experimented with drugs and was already an alcoholic and gambler. The kids called the cops on him one night because he had her pinned to the ground & she was kicking & screaming trying to get him off of her, he's threatened to kill her & himself several times... now he has quit his job and ran off with the kids. His family has a great deal of money and no one will answer any phones. Our family doesn't have the kind of money they have, she's got cut off notices on all the utilities, her vehicle is going to be repo'd, she didn't work... only he did... what can we do to get the kids back & even more - how do we find them & him??!! She has filed assault charges on him but frankly the small country city population 3600 doesn't have the resourses to look for him.
2006-06-20 06:13:56 · 14 answers · asked by ez_eyes 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She has spoken with the police but they are only separated and he is still legally a parent. We think if he is still in town they are probably at his mother's house but she lives in a gated community & we can't get in w/o the guard calling her or another resident & letting us in. Then he has plenty of time to leave w/ the kids b4 us or the cops can even get back to her property.
2006-06-20 06:20:31 · update #1
You need to go to the court house family division and file for a court date. Then contact a lawyer and they will file for temporary custody of the kids till the judge decides what is best for them. The lawyer should be covered by legal aid especially if there is no income. Tell her to get a job even if it's through a temporary agency for the time being, it will help keep her mind off of it, and will also show the judge that she is able to support the kids. Tell her to put the utilities in her name to establish a credit rating. The cops will not go after him for the kids until she has it in place that temporary custody is hers. They don't consider it kidnapping since he is the father. Tell her to call children's services in her area and let them know of his problems and what has occurred they can help in getting the children back. Been in the same situation so if you need more help just contact me.
2006-06-20 06:28:20 · answer #1 · answered by gettingmadtoday 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
There are three sides to every story when it comes to marriage, divorce, and custody. Her side of the story, his side of the story, and the truth. I imagine if we heard from him on this issue he would have his own version of the goings on. A father can't "steal" his own children (all he has done is taken exclusive control of the possession of them - they are HIS kids too!) more than a mother can unless there is a court order in place. Society and present family law is so predujiced towards women today that she doesn't need a ton of money to fight for her rights. It just happens to be how the pedulum swings - prior to the 60's the laws were predujudiced towards the men having the assumed right of custody. There are numerous agencies available for assistance - and if she just spends the time and work researching it herself can do most of the legal procedures herself. But she has to act - the court will not do anything unless they are asked to in the form of legal motions. Most states provide for emergency temporary custody hearings wheras you are seen by a judge quickly who will decide what is best for the kids during the period leading up to a full hearing when "permanent" decisions can be made after hearing all of the evidence.
2006-06-20 07:29:48 · answer #2 · answered by lakenaciguy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The small city is not the only one looking for them, they are entered into a national database throughout the country. Try and get some national attention by going to the media. The more exposure the better. Good luck in your search, I will be praying for the situation to come to an end quickly and safely. By all means seek God's help.
2006-06-20 06:19:34 · answer #3 · answered by AngiB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately the cops are right being that he is a parent he has legal custody so it is not considered a kidnapping. My advice would be to hire an attorney. Have her get copies of the police report showing the abuse. Also she may want to contact social services if her resources are low. social services will investigate both parents and determine who is fit to take care of the children. I was in a similar situation and i totally understand the frustration.
2006-06-20 07:12:28 · answer #4 · answered by barbie_prk 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all contact the police and list them as missing. This will cause them to issue Amber alerts for the children. Right now this is all you can do as well as do some looking yourself. Never approach him alone, please tell your sister to always have someone with her especially when she goes around town looking for them. They might still be in the area. Good luck! Also contact a lawyer.
2006-06-20 06:17:37 · answer #5 · answered by kitcat 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Cops can't say that! Just becasue he is the father he can't just up and take them. She needs to tell them she is affraid for their welfare...the cops HAVE to make a visit to the location on where you think they are to "check on the welfare of the children" she needs to get an attorney right away!
2006-06-20 06:31:41 · answer #6 · answered by Workinmamma 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
god how awful!the first place to start is to go to the police and then- get a layer no money?call around and find one to help probono he has actualy kidnaped the kids after so many hours of not letting her know where they are . good luck to her ! my thought are with her!
2006-06-20 06:19:36 · answer #7 · answered by him n her♥ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Call the police and report a kidnapping?
They will enact the Amber alert system.
2006-06-20 06:15:56 · answer #8 · answered by Rho Zeta 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you go to the local newspaper and tv stations to report the kidnapping. Have flyers of him posted all over.
2006-06-20 06:16:27 · answer #9 · answered by finesthaitian 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she needs to get a lawyer. since it doesn't sound like there is a custody agreement she can't report them as missing or kidnapped because they are with their father and even though he is messed up he has equal rights to them as she does. good luck !!
2006-06-20 07:30:27 · answer #10 · answered by evilprincess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋