Couple days ago, i saw big bruises on my friend. She told me that she bumped into a wall, but i didnt believe it. So i told my mom and dad who are both doctors about it later that night. They told me to ask my friend over so they could check out the bruises. After my friend left, my mom and dad told me those are not bruises from bumping into a wall or falling. How can i help her?!?! please help me!!!
2006-06-20 05:55:58 · 66 answers · asked by shaygirlie06 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
my parents could tell because there were like finger markings, or whatever they called it
2006-06-20 06:06:02 · update #1
report it. domestic abuse
2006-06-20 05:57:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
could tell that the bruises were from someone hitting her and not from running into a wall, but if you all feel strongly, then you should do something about it.
Maybe bring up a fake story about your mom's friend or a fake friend who had a boyfriend beating her. See how she reacts... this may make it easier for her to open up.
You can't rush this because if you do she will retreat and not talk to you about it. Let her set the pace. Remember not to accuse or make someone look bad because of the circumstances. The more neutral you remain the more she will see that she can open up.
2014-11-02 12:11:43 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure how your parents could tell that the bruises were from someone hitting her and not from running into a wall, but if you all feel strongly, then you should do something about it.
Maybe bring up a fake story about your mom's friend or a fake friend who had a boyfriend beating her. See how she reacts... this may make it easier for her to open up.
You can't rush this because if you do she will retreat and not talk to you about it. Let her set the pace. Remember not to accuse or make someone look bad because of the circumstances. The more neutral you remain the more she will see that she can open up.
She's scared and doubly scared to talk about it. If you don't think her life is in danger, then proceed slowly. It takes time for someone in this sort of situation to realize what is going on.
2006-06-20 06:01:53 · answer #3 · answered by leannainpa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bruises from a bump will always be round. How you can tell if it's from being hit is that it will be straight. It's the spaces in between the fingers that leave the bruises on a hit.
How old is your friend? If she's young, it could be her parents. It so, you would have an obligation to report it.
Otherwise, you need to have a talk with your friend. Take her somewhere private and just ask her.
2006-06-20 06:00:28 · answer #4 · answered by double_nubbins 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, are you sure it is her boyfriend who is giving her the bruises? Is this the first time you have seen bruises on your friend? has she ever described situations with her boyfriend that lead you to suspect him of abuse? I would try to talk to her... although don't approach her directly, open the conversation with something very general like, "how are you and your boyfriend doing? everything going ok?" if you just start the conversation with, "does your bf beat you?" you immediately put her on the defensive.
if you do find out her bf is hitting her, i recommend you do some research to see if there is a local women's shelter in your town. they have professionals who can offer help, they are typically not just a place where women can live, they also offer a variety of services, such as counseling, and medical help.
lastly, try this hotline for more advice & help: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)... they also have a website: http://www.ndvh.org/
They are the National Domestic Violence Hotline, and I have heard that they are very good.
Much luck and courage to you and your friend.
2006-06-20 06:10:41 · answer #5 · answered by jessytwessy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give me her boyfriends address and I`ll go bust his a s s!! Talk to her about it in front of him and tell her that if you see anymore bruises on her that you will tell her parents. My daughter`s boyfriend did that one time and I took some biker friends of mine to his front door. He didn`t touch her anymore !! As a matter of fact he broke up with her 2 weeks later cause he told her that I scared him!! She was mad at Dad for a while but rather her mad at me then her being in the morgue. I`ve seen it happen at a bar one night a guy hit his girl and she didn`t get up! Men are a lot stronger than women and it doesn`t take much to due permanant damage or death. No one should have to deal with that!!
2006-06-20 06:04:25 · answer #6 · answered by bren_jim 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't call the cops or report it to anyone. Firs you have to find out exactly what happened.If you report something false without actual evidence that he is hitting her you might end up in jail for false information.What you can do is talk to your friend tell her that you are there for her whenever she needs you and that you support all her decisions she makes. But that if the boyfriend is doing this to her. She shoul not take any abuse offer to take her to talk to someone about it. Tell her that you dont want to get into their relationship but she is your friend and you worry about her wellbeing.No matter what show her you are there to be a true friend.
2006-06-20 06:02:27 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Obviously, she needs help. Unfortunately, in many cases the person that needs the help refuses it. You have started by getting your parents to check things out. They should help. Tell adults until somebody takes action. Do her parents know what is going on? Tell them. Tell a trusted teacher, school counsler, minister, social welfare. Also, talk to your friend. Let her know you are there to help without being judgemental. Help her understand that this relationship is not good for her.
2006-06-20 06:03:45 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just try and talk to her about it....that is the best thing to do. Tell her that you don't believe those bruises came from a wall and that if she needs help, you will help her.
2006-06-20 05:57:30 · answer #9 · answered by Rebecca 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your friend. Tell her you know she didn't get those bruises from a wall. She needs to get out of this abusive relationship because it only gets worse.
2006-06-20 05:59:45 · answer #10 · answered by becca 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to talk to her. Be there, and listen to what she says.
Then, you need to explain to her what she should do, and how she should do it. Give her as much advice as you can, and be there for her every step of the way.
Abuse is something that hits home for many people, and has touched many peoples lives. And belive me from expirence of having an abused best friend, the more you're there for her, the more she will thank you and the better off she is.
2006-06-20 05:58:07 · answer #11 · answered by ♫ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋