So, my girlfriend and i have been together for 7 years in a mostly long distance relationship, we went to seperate colleges have seperate careers (she is in Med School - I am in sales), both of us have felt like we needed a break at one point or another but we have never broken it off completely. there has been true love here the kind you may never find in a million years of searching. She decided that she loves me, but is no longer in love (for now). We still talk everyday and see eachother once in awhile, She is my bestfriend, but i can not just be friends with her right now there is no initimacy, she has been coming around more and being warmer with hugs and actual passionate kisees. But still needs to time. What else can i do to get her back...not convince her or trick her to love me, but get her to feel the same way.
HELP
2006-06-20 04:47:52 · 12 answers · asked by dave g 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
time will tell dude...if her affection towards you is getting more "close" then shes not lost to you dude...she just needs a little space...from what i understand i dont think shes going anywhere...just let it unfold...
2006-06-20 04:58:08 · answer #1 · answered by lastofodyinbreed 4 · 7⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry but if she is no longer in love with you, you just can't make that happen.. I was married for 11 years and was not in love with my husband for the last 2 years I was married. It sucks but it is a feeling and no matter what you do if the feelings are not there they won't ever be. Believe me there is other people out there, I know it does not feel like that now or that you probley want anyone else right now. But life is too short, and trust me you will find someone that can't live with out you and that will feel the same that you do. It is worth the wait!!!! I am there right now. I never thought that I would find someone else but I did and he is the love of my life. He is my best friend and we do everything together. You deserve that!!! Don't be afraid that your life will end, be afraid it will never begin!!! Good luck if ya wanna talk email me. motorcyclelovinmama@yahoo.com
2006-06-20 05:06:18 · answer #2 · answered by motorcyclelovinmama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She's using you as her emotional tampon. She's just "stringing" you along. (get it, stringing. hehe)
I recommend you break it off completely and get on with your life. Which you probably won't do because you're in love, so you're in "dumb as$" mode right now. (Been there myself)
I have a theory about women, you could try it out. It's the "toy in the corner" theory. Example: room full of children all playing, there's a toy in the corner no one wants...until one child picks it up. then every kid in the room is screaming for it. You need to bring in the "new girlfriend" factor. Every time your friend calls say something about this new girlfriend. If she wants to go do something with you tell her you'd like to but can't because you and your new girlfriend are doing something...etc...
If that doesn't work then you're done for.
2006-06-20 05:11:50 · answer #3 · answered by Coz 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1st you could never trick any body into love..it can never happen..if i were you i would take a step back and let time take its course. if she still loves you then there is time she will fall back in love with you. 7 years is a long time for a relationship to be swept away...you still have every day contact which you should be thankful for. at least she still comes to you and is being that little more passionate every time which in a womans eyes is a good thing. she clearly hasnt lost any feeling for you at all. and i want to point out there is more to a relationship than intimacy. take your time dont be pushy with her or she will walk away. and i hope you can both work it out. good luck.
2006-06-20 04:59:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if she needs time give her time etc long distance things are pretty tough and its nice to see that you guys worked it out for 7 long years. Do you even want her in your life even thought if she is not in love with you any more? Like you said she is your best friend do you want to lose that too? You lost her love now her friendship too? Make your decision and who knows if you guys stay friends like your than time might just change everything.... she may come to realize what you mean to her that your not just a friend your more than that....
There is a saying if you love someone let them go, if they come back they are your but if they don't than they never were yours to begin with!
2006-06-20 04:55:55 · answer #5 · answered by Pari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what your girlfriend doings is resembles me coz I used to have a long relationship (7 years) with my 1st bf. Unfortunately, I do not have a passionate feeling anylonger with my ex till I initiate break-up which resulting me regret deeply in my heart coz he is still the best man I ever dated with. The only regret raised by my ex is that he should have proposed to me before I made the decision of break-up because of too long of courtship relationship.
2006-06-20 05:03:31 · answer #6 · answered by Adorable Mrs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is not trick to this. She either will love you or she wont. It is her choice and you cannot make that choice for her. Be friends with her and take it slow but dont push and pressure her. You will push her away by doing this. Be patient and wait for her. Give it some time. If it is meant to be it will happen down the road for you with her and nothing will happen to change it if it is meant to be.
2006-06-20 06:33:39 · answer #7 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you are wasting your time, seems like she is keeping you on the shelf while she plays the field, looking to see if the grass is greener before truly commiting. There are many fish in the sea my friend, some willing to truly committ.
2006-06-20 04:52:29 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, I agree with the other response...she's put u on a shelf. If you get a life and aren't always available to her, she may find she needs more of you which could bring her back or force you to discover ... life ... someone else ... other interests ... etc.
2006-06-20 04:56:52 · answer #9 · answered by kromane 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can not control how someone feels about you. You need to prepare yourself for the possibilitiy of this relationship not evolving any further than it has.
2006-06-20 04:56:28 · answer #10 · answered by Mean Carleen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absence makes the heart grow fonder.......don't be such easy access to her calls and hugs/kisses.....when she thinks there's a chance you've moved on, she'll be back.....
2006-06-20 05:43:06 · answer #11 · answered by bluez 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋