My husband and I got back together after being seperated for almost one year. We have two young boys and have been together for the past three weeks. We were out eating Saturday and his phone rang, it was a good friend of his(a female). I got really disturbed, and the way he spoke to her was really uncomfortable, because I know that she said, "Does she get mad?" and he said, "Oh No, not at all." We had talked about this when getting back together, and I agreed that I would be patient with him because after seperating he got lots of female friends, and I know that they are just "friends" as he says. He apologized that day and said to please understand, but I know this girl and I know that he just talkes to her as "friends" but as a wife and woman sometimes it is hard. I prefer to hear him speak to whoever calls in front of me than for him to do it as a secret, and I believe that if I do trust him then that's how it should be right? Any advice?
2006-06-20 04:27:46 · 13 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Trust is everything, and without you have nothing. Don't try and fool yourself into thinking you trust him, when you know you don't. Be honest with yourself and then be honest with him. It's better to do it now rather than 10 yrs from now. Better for you, him and the kids.
2006-06-20 04:46:23 · answer #1 · answered by sleepingbeauty123 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then in the 1st place, you shouldn't seperate with your husband which I do not know what is the behind reasons. During your separations, I'm pretty sure that both you and your husband has own life with full circle of friends. So why are you bother and upset so much that a caller of his friend calls to your husband?
If your husband has make up his mind to be back together with you, shouldn't you trust him with all your heart coz he could have flings freedomly if he really decides to break up with you. Think carefully and sometimes, being a wife, should know how to tact the situation.
2006-06-20 04:52:04 · answer #2 · answered by Adorable Mrs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Clearly he's wrong about whether or not you get mad about such things. And maybe you are wrong about yourself as well. It's okay to admit to yourself that these things are an issue with you. Once you are able to do that and admit it to your dude, then you begin to try to understand the why behind those feelings. More than likely you feel he's connected in a way with these girls that you don't share with him. On the other hand, these may be women waiting in the wings in case the two of you break up again, or women that he's messing with right now. It's impossible to tell without more facts. On second thought, it's probably just best to tell this guy to lose the female friends.
2006-06-20 04:35:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
there is no reason for him to have female friends other than aquaintances/work relationships. If he needs advice from a woman about things he can ask his mom or sister or cousin.......this is how affairs start.....you talk about a few things and that person says oh that's too bad I would never act like that or treat you that way and boom your sharing your husband. If he can't talk with them in front of you then whatever is being said shouldn't be said. Put your foot down.
2006-06-20 04:34:11 · answer #4 · answered by sam815 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't give a flying f*ck if he made friends while we were separated. Your back together now right ? Well then his single days are over. If he wants to chat with females all day long then he should have filed divorce papers. Standing for this is bs.
2006-06-20 04:32:07 · answer #5 · answered by JustMe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him an ultimatum. Getting back together means no calls, contacts, communications or meeting any woman friends.
2006-06-20 05:28:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You feel what you feel - feelings are not wrong. It's how you react.
Can you trust him? Maybe you would prefer that he talk in private, or maybe a double date would be better - see that she's with someone herself. It's an awkward situation.
2006-06-20 04:32:26 · answer #7 · answered by thedavecorp 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should just let it be because i anserd this qustion and i only got 1 qustion and i anserd to that anser and i feel muck better you should dump him again because he ovleysly does not have anymore ittien to you so if you like feeling this way then do not lesin to us but if you hate feeling this way and you need help then you lestion to me or anyone else because i hated feeling like that and now i feel better about myself so i really hoped i helped because i really am houred of wat i do! E-mail me at mechia223@yahoo.com if you have any more qustions!
2006-06-20 04:34:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you took him back you forgave all, did you not? Then trust him if for some reason he breaks this trust, then leave him and go on.
2006-06-20 04:31:43 · answer #9 · answered by Granny 1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
absolutely right, tell him how much it hurts when he does itand explain it's not that he has female friends that bothers you, it's that he doesn't feel like he can talk to them in front of you
2006-06-20 04:31:22 · answer #10 · answered by Ace A 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋