maybe if he was more thoughtful of me, it would be easier. He has slowly chipped away my respect for him.
2006-06-20 00:16:10 · 17 answers · asked by loubug 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I guess that's my point. When do you finally decide the negatives outweigh the positives and no matter how good a guy he is, you are better off alone.
2006-06-20 00:38:17 · update #1
Truthfully I would let him know that if he doesn't start treating you with more respect that it will have to be over because you have treated him with respect, however, he doesn't feel like he has to treat you with respect. Try expressing your feelings, and tell him what you feel like he has been doing, then what you would like him to do about it. Maybe suggest him help out around the house even if it is doing the dishes or helping with laundry or picking up after himself. I actually was just in a situation just like yours, and I had o tell him that it was either he got a job, started helping out with the household chores, and cooking, and stopped being lazy otherwise I was going to leave him for good. I hope this helps
2006-06-20 00:25:35 · answer #1 · answered by mandi88_bailey05_ray 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well there are 2 ways you can just leave now and save yourself time or give him one last chance. And if you choose to give him a chance than you have to be strong this time and sit down and calmly put down all the things that you have in your mind for him that he better improve on.... like telling that the beginning of the relationship was wonderful but as the time passed your respect towards him flew by too and if he really wants to work this out with you he better start working towards it... and this time you tell him that even though you guys are living together he does his share of chores and you do yours... and if he has lost interest in you tell him to be honest and let you know so you do not waste your time with a moron like him... but if he choose to be with you than wait n see how things go if he is changing or not.... give him say a month or so to change himself and than make your final decision based on what happened in the past month.
Good luck
2006-06-20 00:41:55 · answer #2 · answered by Pari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Write him: "Dear John, four years ago, I saw you on a pedestal of respectfulness, responsbility, romance and reasonableness. I thought that pedestal formed a solid foundation for a relationship. Now, four years later, you have destroyed that foundation, and I realize, much to my regret, that I built it for you, rather than you earning those characteristics for yourself. Well since there is no foundation, our relationship has no basis by which it can survive, and certainly not thrive. Therefore, goodbye. Do not try to convince me that I'm wrong--you don't have a basis on which to stand."
2006-06-20 00:35:36 · answer #3 · answered by mcjordansr 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless he changes he will eventually loose all of your respect. If he cannot take your concerns seriously and work at being better at certain things, more problems will develop and the day may come when you say forget it, this is not worth it.
2006-06-20 00:34:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are at the point with him, that you need to move on. He isn't changing, and not giving you what you need. Life is short, and youth is passing you by, while you're with him. You will never meet a nice guy as long as you're with him, so MOVE ON! Good Luck! Four years is long enough to waste!!
2006-06-20 00:24:33 · answer #5 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know what you mean. I was with my ex for 10 years. I worked three jobs, paid the bills, cleaned the house, cooked, did the laundry and every thing else all she did was sit there. dont make the same mistake I did they never change. If your smart you wont wast one more day. it will drain you. good luck
2006-06-20 00:44:27 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was with my last man 4 years too, I left due to his thoughtfulness of me, always rude and disrespectful, I believe it does wear on you leaving you not feeling any respect anymore, keep lookin
2006-06-20 00:44:27 · answer #7 · answered by wonderin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
time to go on your own, will be better off. 4yr is long enough.
I think it only takes 2 yr.
good luck and believe in yourself. and leave him.
there is a man that will respect you. and treat you the way you deserve to be treated.
if you keep overlooking this, you will regret it.
2006-06-20 00:47:26 · answer #8 · answered by cats3inhouse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was with a lazy, irresponsible, and abusive man for five years. It won't get better. Leave him
2006-06-20 00:22:09 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sound's like maybe it is not ment to be. the respect thing is a big deal.
2006-06-20 00:29:15 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋