please, if you dont know, dont answer. help from women please!?

Question

I have a sexual problem and i wondered if anyone else has had the same problem, and if its normal. I have not been with a man for a long time, and i have always tended to my own needs. the problem is, i cannot orgasim. No matter how hard i try, i have used all different kinds of things to help out, and nothing works. I used to have no problem, now, i seem to get i guess what men would call, blue balls. I get so frustrated, and it starts to hurt down there. has anyone else had this problem before, and if so, what did you do? I know this is a personal question to be asking, but i dont know what else to do. i am in my late 20s. could it be early menopause? Please, if someone knows the answer, let me know. I have been so frustrated, it feels as though i am going to explode! Please only answer if you can help.

Answer 1

Girls are like- different from guys in that area. Some girls can do it like guys, some can't. Anyways- the bottom line is girls tend to need a emotional grip with the big O. Maybe its an emotional problem and not physical. Try lighting some candles and having a hot bath and whatnot you know- relaxing and allowing it to happen.

Answer 2

The pain you are feeling is quite real, and is due to pelvic congestion from getting aroused and not having that release. If you used to be able to have an orgasm, and now you can't, you need to think about if there are any emotional problems or if something is bothering you that you have not dealt with- that can keep you from relaxing completely and letting go.. you should talk to your spouse about it, and see if you guys can start slow, sometimes, a husband knows what works, so he starts skipping the other stuff, and then wonders why it doesn't work anymore. Things like passionately kissing you, rubbing your back or neck, whatever he used to do that relaxed you and got you in the mood- And- late 20's are not a time for menopause-you have a while yet. If you are still having problems, talk to your Gynecologist for some help.

Answer 3

I think that women go through all different phases with their sexual libido...are you taking any antidepressants or other medications? These can really effect your ability to climax or even to become arroused. What level of stress do you have in your life? If your stress is creeping into your head before you are able to climax it can really put a damper on things...I know this one from experience. Maybe all the common things that you imagine while you are 'taking care of business' are old news and you need a new fantasy...you could just be bored.

I really doubt that you are in perimenopause at your age and sexual lability has it's ups and downs...stop stressing about it...get a smut book...and find a new fantasy...see if this helps.

Answer 4

all i can say is its not an early menopause,you got at least another 20yrs for that;maybe youve become so concerned about it the anxiety itself is preventing you,try a visit to anne summers and take time to be properly relaxed in a silky setting,the more you worry about it the harder it'll be.x

Answer 5

I am 41, but i also have this problem. i have tried everything, and nothing has helped. i know what caused mine, it was a vaginal hysterectomy. i also get sore and frustrated from trying and often fake orgasm so as not to hurt my husband's feelings. have you tried the new KY warming lubricant. i did, and it did not work for me. i am interested to see what advice people give you. good luck.

Answer 6

either seek your GP (general practioner) or a specialist in this area, maybe a gynacologist. hope i could help in some way.

Answer 7

HI M VINI.I DONT KNOW MUCH ABT THIS PROBLEM BUT I AM A MEDICAL STUDENT....LISTEN AND PLZ TAKE THIS ADVICE...PLZ GO VISIT A GYNAECOLOGIST!!!!IT CAN BE SERIOU..MAYBE A MEDICAL PROBLEM

Answer 8

seek a doc!