Parents do you or would you ever(see details)?

Question

Do you now or would you ever allow your children to do the following?
1) drink alcohol
2) smoke
3) use obscenities around you

Just something i was thinking about my answers are no to all three.

Answer 1

Yes, I would allow my child to drink (at an appropriate age, of course). Naturally i would encourage them to drink in moderation. However, I am a realistic person and I realize that kids ARE going to experiment with alcohol at some point in time. If i held a firm "no tolerance" standpoint, then in my mind it would only encourage my child to lie to me. I would rather my child call me to come pick him up at 3am because he's too drunk to drive home rather than be too afraid to call me in case I had a bad reaction, and die driving home drunk like several of my high school classmates did. I understand that not all hold this same viewpoint, and that's fine. I'm just stating my own personal view.

As for smoking, no, I would not let my child smoke. I also would strongly discourage the use of obscenities, and would not allow my child to use them around me. I would also make sure my child was aware it is not appropriate for men to curse in the presence of women or children.

At some point your child becomes an independent adult capable of making decisions for him or herself. At that point all you can do is hope that by the time they leave the house you have instilled in them the values and morals they need to live their life in a way you can be content and happy with.

Answer 2

That depends. You ask would i allow my children....... but if my children where adults then i would have hoped that i would have raised them with a mind of their own where they can make their own decisions affecting them. Im not saying i candone these actions you mention but what can i do.

Now in the case of young children such as say 10 to 17 year olds well that is a different show. i understand that most, if not all young people 'try' these things at some stage and i feel that is a normal part of growing. my role as a parent is to educate, guide, support and protect my children so there for i would do (and am currently doing) just that. if i find through observing their behavior over time that it seems that they have takin these actions on permanently and are/could be addicted then i try to do my best to get them help all the while supporting them. thats all i can aske of them and myself. So no i dont condone such behaviors but sometimes things are out of our own control.

Answer 3

My children are all grown and while they lived with me they didn't drink alcohol, smoke or use obscenities around me. My husband did all three though and when my kids got older they have done all of the above. I hope your family doesn't end up like that. I tried to instill in them what I believed that it was wrong. It kind of hurt me that they do stuff like that now because when they were little they hated when their daddy smoked and drank and now they do.

Answer 4

I wouldnt let my child smoke because I'm a smoker and I know how bad the addiction is and how hard it is to stop once you start. I wouldnt let them use obscenities around me because I think people who curse sound like trash, But if at the right age under the right circumstance I might let them have a beer while I was there..graduation party wedding reception something like that but it would be very limited and I could be there

Answer 5

I would let them drink in front of me for the first time if they were at least 17, they could smoke in front of me for the first time when they turn 16, and I would only let them use obscenities around me after they were 18

Answer 6

1) Yes, but only when she's in college, and with me present the first few times. She's gonna get introduced to it (There's no way around THAT), I want to be there at first to help her to regulate her drinking.

2) No, and I'm a smoker. She's been told she WILL be an improvement on the original if it kills her.

3) Mild cussing only.

Answer 7

My kids are 12 and 8. So no to 1 & 2, but I'm a little more liberal with certain obsenities if they're said in the house. It helps my son when he gets mad to hit his pillow and scream something out or just listen to Mindless Self-Indulgence and sing along at the top of his lungs. OK with me.

Answer 8

mom of 2 under 5, and first of all i was allowed to drink on occasion and smoke at 12 and never knew if i could cuss cause i wouldnt

now i am hoping and going to direct them to
not want to drink'
not want to smoke
not want to cuss

now on the flip side of my family plan

at some point or another i can see myself letting my under 18 over 16 have a daiquiri (hope she doesnt want it god do i hope she doesnt want it)

I will beat the piss out of my kids if they try smoking,sorry, but madly passionate on this one, awful habit, if they proceed then what they hell will i do? dont know yet

cuss, well i can handle to the common shi*t dam*n but no F's and GD's and that will be ok and only on rare occasions and still then will be corrected all their lives so hopefully it wont be 2nd nature like many

Answer 9

A) I don't drink, I don't like it, I don't like what it does to people, So NO.
B) That's iffy, My dad let me smoke when I was 16, as long as i did it at home, so I wouldn't get busted. So probably.. but not till 16 or 17... God that sounds bad
C) Oh hell no.. *laughs* My child respects me, I still belive in washing the mouth out with soap.

Answer 10

(1) drink alcohol....i will talk to them on the dangers of drinking..and will not allow it as long as i can..but children do grow up to be adult..and then i can not control what they do
(2) smoke...no..same as above
(3) use obscenities around you..i teach my children respect..and i don't cuss..so no i wouldn't allow it

children learn from example..if you do these things then how do you expect to refuse your children to not do it