My best mate has just tried coming onto me and we're both men. What do i do?
2006-06-19 09:00:50 · 34 answers · asked by THE ONE 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Instinct will tell you. Gays and bisexuals reciprocate gays. If you're one, you will welcome such attention. If not, hopefully you can keep the friendship after this one. If you're one of those people who are confused about their sexual orientation, you are likely to push him away. But be kind. Confusion can turn into fear because most of us are afraid of the unknown. And fear can turn into disgust. Whatever you decide, remember, he is your friend.
2006-06-19 09:09:39 · answer #1 · answered by rmparras 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I'm presuming from the way you phrased your question you are straight. If you are then i'd just drop it and don't say anything, afterall you may have got the wrong end of the stick. If he comes onto you again then just be honest and tell him you're interesseted, same as you would if a girl you weren't attracted to came onto you. If you are gay, it depends do you like him??
2006-06-21 06:10:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your best friend has tried coming on to you, then he's either homosexual, bisexual or even bicurious. Whatever he is doesn't concern you - unless he volunteers this information. What does concern you is how you deal with this. If you are unhappy with these advances, then tell him this - but in a polite and friendly manner - remember, it takes courage to make a move on someone, and gay/straight/bi - it is just as delicate emotionally.
One thing you need to remember in all this, is that being gay/bi is no disease. He is perfectly entitled to have a crush on you, in the same way as you're perfectly entitled to have a crush on a girl.
If you value him as a friend, then you'll need to be very careful in how you deal with him.
2006-06-19 09:42:27 · answer #3 · answered by nemesis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You ask him what's he playing at.
If he's curious or gay:
You could tell him that you're interested but could you take it slowly... "You're my best mate and I don't want to jump into something that could spoil our friendship"
You could thank him for considering you that way and say "sorry, not interested"
If he was just messin':
you could put it down to the 10 pints of Stella but make it plain it's NEVER to happen again
or you could tell him that you didn't find it funny coz you're gay and you don't need your best mate ripping the p!ss!
2006-06-21 19:55:24 · answer #4 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
assuming you want to keep him as your friend i suggest you talk to him about it, he may have just been curious or could actually like you in that way. or you misread his actions.
try and be tackful about what you say if he does like you, find a way of telling him that you don't like guys(i'm assuming you don't) and you just want to be friends. if he is a good mate he will understand that.
when/if you do talk to him about it try not to be too accusing of his actions, you may have misread something or he has already realised you do and will only see him as a mate and he could just want to pretend it never happened.
it even could have been his way of telling you he is gay without having to say it, you just need to ask.
2006-06-19 09:11:20 · answer #5 · answered by i don't have a nickname 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him straight that you are, well, straight. Or you can go out with a girl in front of him (as in date). That might give him a clue you're straight too. Good luck.
2006-06-19 09:03:34 · answer #6 · answered by alex_s_patrick 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you sure he did? Perhaps he was just playing around with you.....But if you are sure....just ask him what's going on...in the simplest way and without offending him! If he isnt gay....he'll understand the misunderstanding and clear you of any doubts....Good Luck!
J
2006-06-19 09:05:03 · answer #7 · answered by Janet S 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well first of all if you are not gay and you r sure that he is , then you tell him that you r not in that kind of things and if he want y'all could stay friends, if you want to be friends after that
or if you are curios try sleeping with him believe me it is not the worst thing in the world , it's really fun and hot
2006-06-19 09:23:41 · answer #8 · answered by crazzy_em 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you gay?
If you're not, let him know that you're not interested and try to keep being good friends!
If you're gay and u don't like him, let him know that you don't want more than a friendship with him...
2006-06-20 05:32:53 · answer #9 · answered by rhBoy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you don't want to move your friendship in that direction, tell him, "Look, I want to be friends with you but that's it. If you're into guys, that's ok with me, but I'm not and I would appreciate it if you respect my space as a straight man."
2006-06-19 09:07:01 · answer #10 · answered by oldwhatshername 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋