We're 20 years old, half way done with your college careers, and wouldnt actually get married until after we graduate. Im a fan of long engagements. Really I'm just curious at what age getting engaged becomes acceptable.
2006-06-19 06:46:15 · 16 answers · asked by Tulip 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Coming out of school myself, I told myself "It's cheaper to break off an engagement than a marriage"... Sounds bad, I know.. But Just out of school, starting over in life after you thought you had it all figured out that last 4 years... Big changes. An engagment right now may just what brings you and yours together even stronger. Or, *gulp* has adverse effects.. Believe me, the wedding will take a toll on the both of you! You sound so wise for 20! Long engagements are the way to go. Only commitment that (god forbid) that would be broken is the engement. Not as big of a let-down to everyone (family, friends, etc.) as a wedding. I'm all for it girl, CONGRATS!!
2006-06-19 12:24:29 · answer #1 · answered by rickrock1213 2 · 7⤊ 0⤋
The fact that you are 20 and a student, I think you have something good going on for yourself. I'm not going to sit here and preach or make you think it is right or wrong. Just take in consideration if somehow getting married while still trying to find your place in the world would slow you down or give the love and support that you completely desire. Weigh out the good and the bad. How do your parents feel? Do you guys plan on starting your careers in the same state? Will you two want to start a family soon or wait? With getting established in your careers of choice, will your time at work and your time at home compliment each other? You two love each other, but building a strong successful marriage isn't easy. It's like having another job. You think you know each other now, but people change, people out-grow each other. Take time to get to know each other and I don't care how long you now each other, you still learn something new everyday. What I am trying to say is "It's easy to get married and it feel so good, but it's hard as hell emotionally to go through a divorce because it hurts so bad."
I should know............I divorced my ex-husband 7 years ago and I am only 30 now. You do the math. He was my first love, my best friend and protector. I still wonder sometimes where we would be if we had made it, but then I just laugh because there are so many levels of love. I thought the love that I had for him was the most of all loves, and then learned what real love was later on after becoming a "Grown *** Woman".
The choice is yours.................Good luck
2006-06-19 07:12:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why rush getting engaged? You're already in love and committed.
Personally, I believe getting engaged means you're ready to get married - which clearly you're not. That is not an insult, it's just a fact about your situation in life! It doesn't mean you don't love each other or aren't committed enough.
Of course, I was engaged when I was 20...and I did NOT marry that fiance! Our engagement didn't work out, and what a messy breakup! (I married the REAL man of my dreams at 25). So I may be biased. ;)
2006-06-19 06:50:52 · answer #3 · answered by Marjorie R 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are not too young to be engaged just wait a year or two for marriage. take your time and do not hurry things. My daughter is 19 and in college and looking to get engaged but they want to wait at least 2 years before they marry which my wife and I think is a very wise decision.
2006-06-19 06:51:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
seem at your self now--are you an identical person as you have been once you have been 15? in all hazard no longer. interior the subsequent 4 years, you the two are going to enhance and mature. you could desire to enhance an element, yet you additionally can improve closer at the same time. Wait to get engaged until you're a minimum of left with
2016-12-08 10:32:38
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answered by ? 3
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I have a few friends who were engaged/married in college and are still together 5 to 10 years later. It depends on your goals, your dreams and your aspriations as a couple. It can be done, but you don't have to rush into anything, either. Divorce is messy.
2006-06-19 06:52:31 · answer #6 · answered by mandythemiddaydiva 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was 21 when i got married, my husband was 19, we have 2 great kids and the oldest is graduating from high school this week. we have been married 21 years, and still going strong. Everyone is different. We bought a house the year my husband turned 21. So follow your heart and your head!
2006-06-19 07:32:47 · answer #7 · answered by I CAN SEE RIGHT THROUGH YOU! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Any age is great, just make sure you both have a way of making at least $35,000 a year and your marriage will be alot less stressful. Make sure to finsh college before marriage or you will regert it. Also you will probably charge your career a few times in the next 50 years.
2006-06-19 07:17:14 · answer #8 · answered by antihero1776 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is no magic age. It's all about what feels right between you two and in your relationship. I got married when I was 19 (though people freaked out). Two of my friends married each other when they were 20. Basically, you two are adults. Do what you need to do.
2006-06-19 06:52:51 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My wife and I dated all through college, but didn't get engaged until we graduated and were employed. It saved a lot of stress.
2006-06-19 07:00:52 · answer #10 · answered by FatElvis 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋