Alot of times my husband will not pick things up he leaves laying around, like his clothes or used glasses and a paper plate doesn't seem to make it to the trash. He barely even helps me with the clothes.
2006-06-19 05:29:25 · 15 answers · asked by Michelle P 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think you need to tell him exactly what chores you need him to do. Be frank with him. Say "i need you to throw away your paper plates, put your clothes in the hamper when they're dirty etc..." Now he knows exactly what you expect of him, don't tell him again. When he leaves his clothes on the floor, don't pick them up or nag him, instead place the hamper near the clothes on the floor, preferably someplace that's in his way. Next time he doesn't throw away his paper plates, put the trash can near the dishes or somewhere that he can see it. Eventually he'll learn... hopefully. Good luck
2006-06-19 06:22:35 · answer #1 · answered by married2004 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
My Husband helps with everything. Im not saying that b/c i want you to feel bad. But if my husband help me with EVERYTHING then maybe I know a thing or two about this subject:
1. Dont refuse to have sex with him.
2. Dont nag him.
3. Dont beg him to help.
4. Don't build up resentment towards him even though it's hard not to
What you should do is:
1. Ask him very sweetly (babe, can you get that plate- I know you're tired, I am too)
2. While you're in the middle of doing something else (when you have your hand full) call him and say "hey babe, can you help me a little more, I have a lot going on and need your help"
3. When you do see a mess that he has left or is leeving, ask him to "pick up" right after he leaves the mess
4. Tell him that it make you a happier wife who is less stresed and more full of sexual appitite (how ever its spelled) when he helps you to do everything.
5 Finally, when he's in a good mood and the two of you are out of the house, ask him to put his self in your shoe- and basically explain to him how much it helps and how nice and sweet you think he is for "helping with the house".
2006-06-19 06:33:55 · answer #2 · answered by bouffe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you only will wash what is in the laundry basket, and he is out of socks, underwear, etc, he will get the hint. Well, not the first time, and only if you make him wash the left out items by himself. When he has no glasses to drink out of because you only wash things in the sink.....when he can never find his stuff and you refuse to help look for it....when he can't find the couch for all of the dead paper plates...basically when you make him truly responsible for his own stuff. If you run behind him and then nag at him, he ignores it because stuff still gets done. Go on strike and inform him that he must be in charge of his own things. And mean it. Do not back down! And most importantly--DO NOT NAG. Just restate your position calmly and go on about your business. It may take a week or two, but trust me, in the end he will get the idea.
2006-06-19 05:42:38 · answer #3 · answered by Waferette 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know, men may not paticipate in household chores and sometimes cause a mess, this is bcoz they lacked practice in their families. Dont blame ur husband, sit down and talk to him and say that u love him and that sometimes u might b hurt that he doesnt help u and that he unintentionally leaves u things to clean. I guess that if u dont sound accusing but say it sincerely and affectionately he will respond much better. Also many people may think its hard before they try doing work, by doing work more frequently they become more stronger and can make themselves do work casually. Its like going to a gym, during the first few days u feel lazy but after that its actually fun.
2006-06-19 06:02:46 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him nicely. Help him too and be the help mate you need to be. pick his dishes up for him. He should pick his clothes up though but you know what just smile when you pick them up and love him anyway. You would pick up after a house guest would you not? Then do it for him out of love as you can view him like a house guest.
2006-06-19 05:42:59 · answer #5 · answered by Fast Steve 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you're his wife not his slave and in case he hasn't heard, slavery was abolished years and years ago. He leaves those things laying around and he can pick them up himself. Because if you pick them up, you will throw everything away. And he can foot the bill to replace them. You're running a household not a pig sty and either he respects the house or he can go live in a pig sty. What's it going to be?
2006-06-19 05:37:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get that fool on the Dr. Phil show. I'm sure Dr. Phil will make him help you clean up the house for a change.
2006-06-19 06:02:00 · answer #7 · answered by brian 2010 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you are sick of it and you are only going to do as much work as he does, as you plop down on the couch. Leave your personal items laying around. Give him a dose of his own medicine.
2006-06-19 05:32:43 · answer #8 · answered by javelin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've gone through the same thing. Nagging and the hint games don't work!!! Be sweet and tell him straight up, "I need your help."
2006-06-19 06:08:05 · answer #9 · answered by thisisme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that if he picks up after himself, & helps with the housework you will do your housework in very sexy maid outfit, or hot lingere. Se if that will get him moving.
2006-06-19 05:44:05 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋