Do you think the city has a bad effect on people?

Question

It's commonly held that city-dwellers build 'barriers' around themselves, both emotionally, mentally and, I'm presuming, physically.

People say that city life hardens you up, in an adverse way. It makes you distant, self-centred and obsessed with the materiality of things. (Commonly held views, not my own opinion).

Now I'm a country lad (UK, Dorset), at Uni in Exeter (a city) and so far I'm finding this to be true. Just wondering what anyone else thought?

No offence intended!

Answer 1

No, I don't think it has to be true. I lived in downtown Philadelphia for about 5 years in my 20s and I loved it.

When I first got there I was amazed by all the diversity, all the opportunities - so many things to do, so many things you could be. As I got more comfortable in the city I found it to be the friendliest place I could imagine. I could sit on the bus and strike up a conversation with folks next to me about any topic practically and came away, most of the time, glad for the personal connection. I found myself in dangerous situations and as often as not I found that a stranger helped me out.

By the end of 5 years, I was burnt out and tired of the city. Moved to the suburbs and very rarely went back (got tired of the parking problems, everyone in a hurry, sad to see the homeless and other suffering) but I think that had to do with my own life - the choices I made in where to live in the city, the job i had, the people I knew.

I think there is good and bad in everything and I think we would all do better to really look for the good in all thing and situations.

Answer 2

It depends much on the type of a city. Values of people, traditions, relations and city planning. My childhood passed in an old town of one city and this environment was really great. Homes had only two floors, closed yards, people knew each other, children played safely, and a shop was so close that everybody could buy anything lacking in 3 minutes. Also a school and different restaurants in proximity, including a cheap and healthy one - in case people want to make break from cooking. Now it is quite a problem to find a place to nourish a child at six o'clock in the same city - almost everything occupied or with heavy smokers or food is expensive and not healthy. People are afraid to walk in the evening before sleep near the river because they are afraid of hooligans and drug abusers or just another not pleasant people who take every walking younger women for prostitutes. Besides most of buildings were converted to shops/ateliers, so the number of old town inhabitants diminished, the community was broken, the old town looks for me like decorated tomb, not a space for life.

Answer 3

I agree, I am from New York but I moved to Georgia, Ive been here for 7 years and I just went back 2 weeks ago. I think the city life really does change people because no one ever really has any space. If its not that then there are always people who are after you. In that case you do have to harden up and be a tough cookie so you dont get yourself into any trouble. The city life is exciting but when it comes to business and just doing what you have to do everyone is stern, just serious. So you start thinking, its all about me because all you can do is make sure you take care of yourself in the midst of a dark world...lol. Seriously. I went back and I wanted to stay but there are just too many vultures...I am back in the lame ol country georgia.

Answer 4

It's true. I have been a city girl my WHOLE life (32 years) and well - u get to building barriers. However- I find myself building barriers more against those that are NOT city-dwellers- because it's unfamiliar territory. I do it at work- tons of people from the suburbs, etc- and they are SO polar opposite me- that I am always on guard for the 'conspiracy'.
Although- I disagree with self-centered and obsessed with material things.. the most honest, real people I have met- city born and raised..

Answer 5

I think it depends on the person. If you are predisposed to be cold and b!tchy, then you will be cold and b!tchy. The city has a lot of really great things to offer. I think what you are confused about is how people protect themselves. Of course in a city you have more people and different types of people. Some good, some bad, some very dangerous. As a coping or protection mechanism, people will appear to be cold and unavailable. If you sport that appearance most people will leave you alone. You will not end up being somebody's vulnerable victim.

What you should do if you are planning a move to the city is to meet a few people. Get to know people on a one on one basis. People will talk to you and be your friend if you are friendly in return. But always remember to protect yourself.

Answer 6

You pretty much hit the nail on the head. There is definitely a desensitization when living in the city as compared to rural locations. I've grown up in the city, and moved out of town at one point. it was only a short distance away, but it was the equivelent of another world, where everyone knew each other, and most people seem friendlier overall.

Mind you, both have thier good and bad sides.....

Answer 7

It could go either way, sometimes it depends on the city or WHAT part of the city. Sometimes you meet some real nice people and since theres like a million people you have a good chance of meeting a nice person. But more often people are rude. I used to live in Chicago and it was ok. I now live 3 hours from there, in a small town with about 10k population, but i like it more. Its more like a family and people hold doors open!

Answer 8

there are pros and cons to EVERYTHING in existence....me personally i grew up in the country and i dont live in the big city now however my husband has been around the world and ive been to a few places...i find that unfortunately the kids that grow up in the city are in a way more intelligent than those in the country...EX:a kid from my town at 12 and a kid from washington D.C. at 12 have totally different interpretations of the world.the on in dc is exposed to much more culture and less prejudice to others as well as a different understanding of just how bad the world can be...whereas the one in the country is a little more sheltered from the dangers and overall badness in the world...the overall intelligence of both is the same but the worldly knowledge is very different...some call it naivety.

Answer 9

Nah, I lived in NYC for awhile and there was never anyone you couldn't ask for directions, or if they know a good joint to eat, or anything like that. And, city-folk come together just like rural folk do-- they look out for each other.

I think that ish you've been hearing is being said out of context, or is coming from heads who've had bad experiences. I agree with you, though, the big city life is what's up.

Tokyo, here I come.

Answer 10

I was born and lived in London, then studied in Leeds, then moved to Swanage (Dorset), and now work in a medium-sized city in China - and have met distant, friendly, self-centred, altruistic, materialistic and spiritual people in all of them. Agreed, overcrowding can have a dehumanising effect, but crowds are composed of people just like you and me.