Does anyone else have trouble with their family? Seems like every family gathering is just full of tension.?

Question

Most issues go unspoken, but there is so much unsaid that it causes the tension.
There is a history of favoritism in our family combined with a stepparent situation and half siblings. It just all seems too much trouble. We are thinking of no longer attending family gatherings because of it. No matter how hard I have tried not to, I end up crying the rest of the day and into the night after we have gotten together with my sisters at my parents' house.

I was the black sheep growing up because I was into music not sports. My family to this day can't carry on a conversation about much of anything other than sports.

Is this common? To have lots of family trouble I mean.

I wanted to elaborate to say that I have tried talking about things before with my family, but my family interprets that as me "stirring things up". If anyone has a concern, they would really rather things go unspoken. Growing up, the only emotion allowed was happiness. You couldn't cry or be angry without a spanking or tongue lashing.

Thanks for the help so far.

Answer 1

Not only is it common a lot of it has to do with the tensions in the world in which we live. People tend to get so caught up in their own problems until a lot of times when the congregate with others that's the only time they feel as though they have to vent so they do it in some of the most unusual places, and at the most inconvenient times. Unfortunately, it can cause a lot of dissension and tension for others around them. They are known as "negative people." They also are usually miserable; there is a saying that goes "Misery loves company," I like to say "Misery demands company." However, as for you and your feelings you have a responsibility to yourself to make sure you are healthy and happy, and no one has the right to rob you of that be it at family gatherings, or any place else. Take some time to think about what's important in your life currently, and then realize you have every right to be comfortable and content within yourself. Don't allow negative people to enter into that realm that belongs to you and only you. There is nothing wrong with removing ourselves from unhealthy situations, and from what you've shared with us--your family gatherings are not the most positive environment for either you or your immediate family. Perhaps you can plan to do things with your own family on the days that gatherings have been planned therefore, you won't be dishonest when you tell your parents you are unable to attend. Also, realize that a certain amount of guilt may bother you for awhile, but believe me, it will also pass......Best wishes to you......Be blessed, be happy, and always be productive...

Answer 2

Oh yeah that is usual for some people i am like you kind of I like music, but am not very fond of sports. Also you should still attend the family gatherings it is not very respectful if you don't. Also maybe you get the family to talk about other stuff it takes some work but i bet you can change it for the better.

Answer 3

First permit me say this EWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!! there is not any way in God's eco-friendly that this is applicable viewing for any kinfolk accumulating. i will understand the proud mom and father yet to instruct the "miracle of start" to youthful little ones is extra incorrect than i will think of of phrases to particular. what's your spouse thinking? Is she conscious that she has traumatized those little ones and given them an unnatural interest approximately some thing that would desire to have come to them at an older age and in a plenty diverse gentler way. i'd have taken my little ones out of the room. i won't be able to imagin somebody doing this. those actually everyone seems to be nuts and in case you spouse is in contract with them, then she is nuts too. whilst her boys strengthen up petrified of ladies individuals or worse turn that interest to the dark edge she would be able to moan and sweetness what occurred. This travesty of parenting would be somewhat of the reason. And to think of you pick a license to have a canine.

Answer 4

it does suck having all that tension and problems in your family. they're supposed to be the one's you run to for comfort and support, not to run away from. have you ever opened up to them and tried to resolve the problems? your family, you all should want to fix it and be happy. god put you there for a reason think about it if this concerns you the most then maybe your he one to fix it. They're your blood you should never distant yourself from them. it's life i'm going through it to.

Answer 5

Girl, saying there's tension in my family would be putting it mildly. My nan on my mom's side favors my aunt and her 2 kids, there are 3 of us altogether. My dad's family doesn't like my mom, and therefore doesn't like me.

Answer 6

hi well am sure u ar there and hv gone thur it, i am positive u ar rite cos hv also gone thur it too,i dnt kn if i will say there is less love or pple dnt jt want to get along,asin when we hv family meetin we jt dnt end it well smtimes d families divids into two,smtimes they jt act crazy well i kn wht u ar talkin about and i hv been thur it too or better still am still goin thur it.

Answer 7

tell them you are uncomfortable. i'm sure your not the only one who feels this way in your family. break open the communication lines. tell them you aren't coming anymore, and why. solve this. i personally have gone through this. it will get worse before it gets better, but it will get better.