You are a (evil) politican, how would you convince your people to believe you?

Question

when you run for office, for example governor, president

Answer 1

1st, run as a Democrat, because they vote for anyone who is not a republican.

2nd, run as a pro-gun, but pro-choice democrat, so as to rally a fringe from both elements.

3rd, create a straw-man of my opponent's personal failings to deflect the arguement to my opponent, not to the issues at hand.

4th, use rhetoric over substance. People wiil need some substance, so provide an easy solution to a non-existent problem, therefore defining it as a problem. With my detailed analysis, I seem smart, but with my reliance on rhetoric on the real issues, I seem connected to the people.

5th, hire Carl Rove and Carville both to work on my campaign. As a democrat, I need to keep Rove in the backgound. Do not worry, they will work together. They are both spawn of Satan, though Carville looks more the part and Rove acts more the part.

6th, hammer radio ads early to disquiet the conservative base of am radio. Hammer the tv spots later, so my opponent wastes money early on, and then my tv spots are re-buttals.

7th, learn from the dwarf Dukakis, and go pro-death penalty.

8th, learn from Bush Sr. and never break a promise to my base.

9th, learn from Clinton and lie, lie, lie.

10th, learn from Jr., and let people underestimate me. I do not care if they think he is an idiot. He won back to back presidencies against people who were "better set to win" then him, he beat Ann Richards in Texas, and is the first governor EVER in Texas to serve two consecutive terms in office.

11, learn from Carter and try not to embaress the country every time I open my mouth.

12, hide the 666 tattoo on my head with a beautiful hair style.

Answer 2

Have you read Machiavelli's The Prince?

Find a minority any one will do.

Find a bunch of malcontents. Educated and stupid (preferably both)

Tell the second group that all their problems are caused by the first.

Find a media wh*re prepared to say it on TV

Promise a brighter future

Remind people the minority group is clever and conniving and plotting to destroy them

Remind people the minority group is stupid and sub human- Don't worry they will not see the contradiction

If anyone does call them a liberal sympathiser or a collaborator.

Ummm.... can't think of anything else right now. Parades are good. Look at Hitlers rise. He had it pretty sussed I think

Answer 3

I would ignore vital intelligence information and then wait for an attack to occur on US soil. After the attack, I would then claim that it was at least partly the work of an oil-rich country that really was in no way involved. If I do that, then my friends in the oil and defense industries can get no-bid contracts worth over a billion dollars to exploit the war zone. Hey, wait a minute! Hasn't that already been done?

Answer 4

get a celebrity endorsement, fans of that person would think "hey, if Brad Pitt likes it, so do I!"... if you remember in last presidential election, John Kerry used Tom Cruise. Although he did not win the election, he did win the popular vote, meaning that more people liked his views. I'd bet Tom Cruise as a fan of yours doesent hurt your popularity.

If your running for governor, you might try getting an actor/actress who is from your state to do a commercial with you.

Answer 5

If I am evil it will be easy for me to lie my way into anything

Answer 6

God, Guns, Gays
God, Guns, Gays
God, Guns, Gays
It's the economy, stupid!
God, Guns, Gays
God, Guns, Gays...

Answer 7

I'd get my dad elected President first.

Answer 8

Repeat the lies over and over and over and over again while looking at them in the eyes... pple will believe u and vote !

It works even in Africa (Kenya) !

Answer 9

Ask Hitler and Shrub 4 help.

Answer 10

By convicing everyone they only want to impeach me over sex!