I've been best friends with the ex for 6 years and we dated for the last year before I broke up with him for someone else.I feel really guilty and responsible and just feel like I need to write him a letter to explain how sorry I am about how things ended but I just can't find the words to say.
2006-06-19 02:15:42 · 30 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
If your ex was that distraught over your breakup then for his sake, you would probably be better off just leaving him alone. Give him as much time and space as he needs to get over you. If he reaches the point that he feels he can resume your friendship then he will get in touch with you. Unfortunately, he may not ever reach that point. It's a sad but true fact that happens sometimes when you date friends.
2006-06-19 02:19:08 · answer #1 · answered by Lubers25 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Alright then how about getting a greeting card that could express your sentiments. Let him know that although things didn't work out for the two of you that you still value and cherish the friendship, and would like to keep in touch simply to see how he's doing every now and then. Also, you might want to get a card for yourself too. You sound as though you're riddled with guilt; which is understandable. We all make decisions that may not be to the liking of others but we can't allow that to stop us from living our lives to the fullest. If you feel as though you need to beat yourself up for what happened, do it with a feather. You are not responsible for his feelings or how he reacted. He and only he controls his feelings. You can however, continue to send him a card 2-3 times a year just to let him know that you're thinking of him....Best wishes...
2006-07-02 15:57:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can answer that question!! I was married for 22yrs and it happen to me also..... Speaking from your x's point of view... When you take a chance on loving someone and you put your heart and soul into this one person, and they let you down.... OMG its the worst feeling you can ever feel, because he doesn't understand what this new man has that you need, that he didn't give you....... It's a real blow to his ego..... But its not your fault, your feelings have changed towards him..... You need to search your heart and soul, and tell him the truth......... I wish you the best in this matter..... Just don't lead him on, be honest........ But look at him and say this... Like with my x hubby, we are still good friends, because the 22yrs that we were together did mean something, and i won't lose that over fighting, because i didn't' get my own way....... I would rather have him in my life as a friend then not at all.......... Good luck, but tread carefully with his heart... He did mean something to you at one time..
2006-06-29 10:28:54 · answer #3 · answered by ladybug 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well coming from a few nasty break-ups, I wouldn't suggest writing him. Its only going to confuse the situation further and rehash bad feelings that he probably isn't ready to deal with yet. As time passes, the past will fade and new things in both of your lives will ease the hardship. I think it is just best to let sleeping dogs lie. If you feel bad for the way things ended make amends to yourself and later in life if you run into each other, you might get the chance to make amends with him in one way or another. Keep your head up and learn from the past, don't visit it.
2006-07-02 16:47:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh boy, thats a really though one and i have no clue on what id write to him. I doubt id be writing anything at all actually because this may give him faults hopes and he wont be able to move on at all, some guys stop living and some hurt themselfs because they feel down and sad and dont see the road ahead of them.
I think its best to leave it alone all together, he will get past it in time and once he does he will find new love.
My ex boyfriend who had left me for the navy he was amdly in love with someone before me and told me he almost jumped off a bridge thats how hurt he was, he just didnt see it coming and found her in bed with her ex boyfriend and come to find out she only slept with my ex because she was trying to get prgao to where her own ex boyfriend couldnt get her prago..how sick is that? lol..anyways...like i said id leave it alone and move on...what he does is no longer your problem and he WILL get OVER it.
2006-07-02 18:37:22 · answer #5 · answered by apleasure2u 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My advise if to let it go. You can not undo the past but you can stir up old feelings that my cause him more pain. Eventually he will get on with his life, and if he does something to himself you need to understand that it is not your fault. Everyone makes choices in their lives. You chose to move on, and hopefully he will too. Just don't forget you are only responsible for YOUR life, no-ones elses. Just be happy, and hope that one day he finds happiness too.
2006-07-02 04:06:26 · answer #6 · answered by Tammy G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
just say that you are sorry and that he was an important part of your life. Let him know that he is and was an important part of your life.
He needs to hear that. I dont believe that you should just 'move on'
Life isnt like that. its not that easy to just 'move on' from someone or something. wean him off you at least.
good luck
2006-07-03 01:20:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't want to talk to him or write him!!! He has serious problems if he tryed killing himself, so why would you feel Guilty? Sometimes guy's will try anything just so you will come back to them! I had a boyfreind who threaten to kill himself if i left, i called the police on him and i never took him back, i thought he was crazy , so see it back fired on him and his trick didn't work !! They pull stunts to get you to belive h them and if hes for real , like i said he needs help ! the best thing to was to tell him to get Help he needs ! then your part was done! if you gave him that advice and help then why feel guilty?Maybe he wants you to feel guilty and sorry for him??
2006-07-02 08:25:44 · answer #8 · answered by sports_runner_racing 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. You're not responsible for his happiness. But do get him in touch with a suicide prevention agency. He needs more help than you can give him. Good luck.
2006-06-19 02:18:33 · answer #9 · answered by sacredmud 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u say:
the last thing i would ever want to do is hurt u but in the time that we were together ive been noticing u really aren't the man i want to be wit for the rest of my life. i have thought about this alot and i truely love u but i love u as a friend more then a boyfriend. i sure that on day u will meet the girl that u will die for but right now please just give it time!!!
2006-07-02 08:12:04 · answer #10 · answered by LaLo 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋