Better off out of it?

Question

Two years ago I was close friends with a girl who lived down my street. We went out partying together, took our children for days out together etc.
Unfortunately she started to change.
In the end she tried it on with my dad, boyfriend and started to neglect her child in favour of a new boyfriend.
Me and another friend tried to support her and help her.
All offers of help were refused.
I finally cut all ties with her when she started drink driving with her child in the car (yes we did report her to the police).

I have just learnt that her situation is worsening and she is in hospital after being found in her car in a field passed out through drink/drugs. I do feel very sorry for her.

I am now tempted to ring the hospital and find out how she is - she hasn't got any family, her ex partner (the father of the child) doesn't want to know and she has no friends.

Am I better of out of it or should I ring the hospital?

Answer 1

Tough answer, but it's not your problem. Sounds like you did everything you could to help her. The decision will have to come from her to change and accept help. You could always leave your contact info at the hospital. Not much more you can do.

Answer 2

She could probably use a friend right now. Maybe this incident will scare her enough that she will try to straighten her life out for the good so she will need someone there for her. You could just call to see how she is and let her persue the friendship if that is what she wants. If she shows signs of being the same person as before the incident then there is nothing you can do for her. She has to want to help herself before you can help her.

Answer 3

Sorry situation. First of all I would contact social services, children are in big danger and they need to be put first. After that try to be there for her by all means but you probably won't get a lot of encouragement on her part. What she really needs right now is professional help and she can only do that by the process of acceptence. Just be there for her when she has come through it.

Answer 4

I would see how the child is, and your friend she needs alot of help by the sounds of it. try and talk to her and see why she is ruining her life by being like this.

If she carries on this way she could have her child put in care you cant act ike this when you have kids they come first no matter what.

Find out how she is maybe go and see her and offer some help and a shoulder to cry on good luck wont be easy but she must feel crap about what she is doing good luck

Answer 5

Send her a letter via the hospital explaining that you'd like to help and visit her, if you can...

Be sympathetic and supportive, but draw a line about how far you are willing to go... Sometimes help can be taken too far and problems arise... And tell your family and friends what you are doing, and warn them about past experiences with her...

Then see what happens... If she refuses, then wait for her to come around and don't let her get you down...

Answer 6

Keep out of it for sure. She is at best bad news for you and yours. She needs professional help which she will be linked in to by the hospital Whether she takes it or not is another matter. Good on you for caring but sometimes love has to be tough.

Answer 7

It would be nice of you, to call the hospital and check on her. She really needs help.You can't give her the help she needs, but maybe now you could talk her into getting professional help. You can't help someone who won't help themselves. Good luck.

Answer 8

Help the child, you're friend needs to help herself.

Answer 9

call and see how her kid is doing atleast. what a shame that the kids have to suffer for irresponsibility.