what would you do ?

Question

my mom and my boyfriend had an affair 4 yrs ago and i finallly decided to end it with him about 2 months later my mom has been seeing him all this time he used to beat me when we were together he does it to my mom when my 2 sisters and 1 brother are there my sisters are 17 / 14 and brother is 11 he is also having to go to court for talking dirty to a 13 yr old girl and her bfriend ( apparently telling them to go and do dirty stuff ) i didnt speak to my mom for 2 1/2 yrs we made up a yr and bit ago she still sees him ( mom and dad are split up ) what do u think u would of done and what would u do now ? ( i now am very happy have a wonderfull man and are going to buy a house together my mom will not come between me and my new bf he hates her for what she put me through they havent spoke for yrs he's willing to speak to her not lots just say hello if she comes round my house with my bro and sisters ) any 1 have an opinion on this and i am very forgiving and naÍve i cant help it im stupid

Answer 1

I think you're mom is retarded for allowing this guy to come around still, especially around your sisters after he's been taken to court for talking dirty to 13 y/o. It sounds like your mom is only concerned about what's best for her and not her children.
I think you are a sweet person for forgiving her....I don't know if I could have been that kind. But, she is your mother and I can see that the relationship you have with her is important. You can't be faulted for that. I would, though, keep an open line of communication with your siblings to ensure this jerk isn't doing anything inappropriate with them.

Answer 2

I would just cut her completely out of your life. She certainly did not care about your happiness, why should you care about hers. This is something I know about, not my mom having an affair, cutting a parent out of your life. My dad was very abusive and he left eventually. Well years later he wanted to try to be father and daughter. I tried and it was sort of okay. One day I fell in love, got engaged, and had my daughter. I noticed he was talking to my daughter the same way he used to talk to me. When I left that day I made a choice for my daughter to never go back. It has been 4 years and I have not seen or talked to him since that day. I have never been happier. At first I though it would be hard, but it is nice not having negativity in my life. I did it for my little girl, she will never know that kind of pain. I won't let him. That is the kind of love a mother should have for her children. So there you go, Not only did I explain that your mom should not have let that happen, but also its easy to walk away and be happy.