what would you do if you found out your husband was cheating on you?

Question

i made the mistake of cheating on my wife and i want to tell her but i'm afraid of what she will do.

Answer 1

This is a horrible situation to be in! But i do understand...I unfornatally have cheated on my husband in the past. Was a while back and i have chosen NOT to tell him...may not be the right thing to do for some people but I realize what i did was VERY WRONG and I know i will never do it again...i am in horrible pain everyday knowing that i didnt uphold our wedding vows, but I get thru it. I would rather be in the pain than telling him and him being in pain as well.....I made the choice like u did...and I am going to have to live every day knowing how wrong it was....The choice is yours....chose it well...

Answer 2

this is a horrible situation to be in for the both of you it is good that you realize your mistakes and now comes the hard part you need to explain to your wife the reason's for doing this if there are any. but she has the right to know and finding out from you is the best way i honestly don't know what i would do if my husband cheated on me but i would not be happy to find out from someone other then him i also think that you should respect your wife enough to let her make up her own mind on what she will do so yes you need to tell her and just hope that you guys can work through it hope everything turns out OK sunshine

Answer 3

From a wife point of view it is bad, my husband cheated on me twice in 12 months we have chosen to work things out between us.

You have to look at what made you cheat in the first place is it because you thought you could get away with it, is it because you were getting something you are not getting at home or is it the adrenaline of casusal sex?

I suggest you look deep down discover why and see what is wrong in your marriage, talk to your wife and explain what were your reasons for doing it...She may yell and rant and rave but that is beter then nothing she has a right to know and then I suggest you go to counselling.

Answer 4

Lol.. from a female's point of view, dude you are screwed. However, all is not lost. Here is a secret that most guys do not know... the female psyche... we actually forgive guys almost no matter what -=its just time wise that allows this to happen=- . Its only cuz we talk to our gf's who tell us we're stupid for forgiving the guy and we end up NOT doing it. If you are truly sorry, you will have to go to extremes of making it up, and somehow prove to her that you wont do it again. Basically, slave for her and dont fight with her about anything for the next like year or so. (hahah) but seriously, we actually will forgive guys -=boyfriends or just guy friends=- far more then we forgive our girl friends. Odd, but true... but still sucks none the less... I mean, I had a really close girl friend, but friction came up and now she hates my guts even though i've said sorry even if it wasn't completely my fault -_- . However, some guy who cheated on her 3 times over, she still forgave him that many times and still together with him. Fair? I think not. -_- its just you guys have to know that secret, just dont abuse the knowledge =) ^^

Answer 5

How did you make the mistake of cheating on her? Were you walking down the street and just fell into a woman with her legs open while your pants were down? You only want to tell her to relieve your guilt , it's not for her. You need to suffer through the whole thing for years and allow it to eat at you until you get an ulcer, a bleeding one and then die in pain.

Answer 6

You should be honest with her. It will hurt her more if she finds out by herself. My ex-husband cheated on me and lied to me about it for five years. I found out on my own. If he would have told me I might have accepted better, but he didn't. We are no longer married. As a result of his cheating the other woman became pregnant. Neither one of knew about each other. He continued to have relations with her even when I found out. Now we are divorced. The other woman wants nothing to do with him and neither do I. He is a lonely old man and will probably never have anyone. I don't feel sorry for him. You have a chance so please tell her and get counceling if you feel that it will help. I wish you the best of luck.

Answer 7

Hmmm - that's so sad. I thought about my reply. We should have marriage training, so that you would not be asking this question. You would already know the answer. (You need training for any other kind of license)
You KNOW that you will never be trusted the way she trusts you now. You need to tell her before she begins to suspect it from the way you act or before she hears it from someone else or reads this.
You guys are going to need some counseling to get through this - that would be my guess. I don't know where you are located, but I'm sure that you can find a counselor not far from you. Try a local church. Good luck!

Answer 8

you should be you a**** hole. if you were my husband i would leave. there is never an excuse for cheating on the one you once loved. i would also leave because obviously, if he cheated on me, he probably lost interest in our relationship and rather be with someone else. you should be afraid of what she is going to do. Please, if you do anything smart in your life, tell her what you have done because you can only hurt her more by lying and keeping your affair a secret. if your lucky she might stick with you and forgive you although you don't deserve it. i guess its not so fun being an adulteress.

Answer 9

well i am a cheater not married , but been in long relationships. and cheated. you didnt cheat because you dont love her. there can be several reasons why you did it, could be bored, in the moment , wana see what else is out there, cold hearted. i dont think you should tell her, what would she do? your marraige would be over. if you have kids maybe she will try to work it out but if its a new maraige and no kids think about it. if you dont tell her it will eat away at you all the time. if you dont want to tell her and are religious go to church in confession

Answer 10

Maybe she knows already. It's your own guilt that you feel you need to release. But that would be burdening her with heartbreak. Do you really want to do that? I'm not sure it's a good idea to tell her. What would that accomplish? Please be very sorry for your actions, and correct your mistake by being the best mate you can be. Best Wishes!