what do married couples do for decorating a new house, who is right?

Question

my husband (of 16yr) and I have just bought our first home. here in ohio. started to put paint on the walls in kitchen and diningroom(we both like) but not finish, he wont let me finish; put paint on 2 walls in teenager(my daughter 16yr)room, wont let me finish; wont let me pick the handles for kitchen cupboard(have tried a few, but nothing we both like). husband says he will pick them out and put them on.
today(sunday, father's day) says that I can help. but the only thing he has "let" me help with is to sweep the floor in the livingroom(where he got wallpaper border off-left on floor) and handed him a few things to get water to stop leaking through the pipe in the basement.
my question is: HUSBAND IS telling me what I can and cant paint or fix. : do all married couples go through this struggle? and what is the wife "allowed" to do without husband's "permission" concerning finishing painting or not.?
am I suppose to just clean up after him and let him finish the whole house his way ?

this IS our first house, we have rented for 16yr. we are the same in height and dont want to hit.
but it is frustrating. yes we talked about what we BOTH wanted the house to look fixing it up. but::
today, we went over there to paint---so I thought----
got over there and he says the first thing we do is fix the water pipe in basement(ok, no problem)
then I took my teen to work, got back to house to paint again and::: he says to sweep the floor, started sweeping the floor(to compromise with him: if I do this then he will let me paint---wrong);
so I ask I cant paint somewhere(to finish one room or another) he says it has to be primed first--- what the h-----!!!!!, the wall looks fine enough without that!!! so then I say cant I go upstairs and do daughter's room---- he says not ready yet!!!! by now after 3 no's and It just became 4pm. this frustrating and annoying, why does he have the right to tell me I cant do this. I wanted to help today and get one thing accomplished today,day off

YOU WOULD GET A DIVORCE OVER THIS AFTER 16YR ????
AND THEN YOU PAY THE HOUSE PAYMENT YOU KNOW YOUR PAYCHECK CAN ONLY PAY HALF THE PAYMENT EACH MONTH, AM COUNTING ON HIS HALF JUST LIKE WHEN RENTING HE COUNTED ON ME TO PAY MY HALF OF RENT.
ICANT PAY $400 HOUSEPAYMENT, INSURANCE, AND GAS, AND UTILITIES EVERY 2 WEEKS OUT OF MY OWN PAYCHECK.
GET A DIVORCE OVER THIS???? DECORATING PROBLEMS????
ISNT THERE ANOTHER SOLUTION NOT SOOOO DRASTIC, TO HAVE HUSBAND UNDERSTAND IM NOT 12 YR CHILD, I CAN PAINT WITHOUT SUPERVISION????

Answer 1

Sheesh, want to switch with my wife she never lets me tell her what to do. I am 6'3" and she just a tiny 5'2" but she is the boss. No really your both adults, work it out, talk, communicate, tell him what you want to do and why and listen to his answers. Maybe he feels guilty that the first house you bought wasn't as big or as nice as he thought it would be. I don't know, but without talking to him, you won't know either. Talking to people on line is not going to get it done either. Sounds to me like your tired and frustrated and will continue to be until you two talk it out. There are no stead fast rules or anything on what you are allowed and not allowed to due in most places in the U.S. and I have to assume it is not a religeous prohibatation as your talking about it on the internet. Talk to him, if you can't talk to him, write him a letter. If worse comes to worse neither of you will be happy.

Answer 2

i do what i want if my husband doesn't like that then he knows where the door is and we've been married 11 years