I teach a martial art, I have done for many years, I have kids, a partner....and a 13yr old female student with the worst crush on me I have ever seen.
I have been holding back on cutting all ties because I remember what it's like to be at the mercy of your hormones, it was only 2 decades or so ago.
She's only a few years older than my daughter, and all I see is a child who is struggling with a situation new to her, however society being what it is I have no idea what to do or say to her apart from cutting all contact.
Any helpful advice will be taken into consideration, I've never been a teenage girl with a crush, I have no idea what is going on in her head.
2006-06-18 08:01:19 · 7 answers · asked by inn0m1n4te 1 in Education & Reference ➔ Teaching
To elaborate on this, she has told me how she feels, and I have tried to explain that she is a good student and a nice girl.
It's not working :|
2006-06-18 08:17:31 · update #1
I was once a 13 year old girl with a crush on a teacher, but it is a little over the top if she is actually admitting it to you. If she is normal she will be over it pretty quickly as long as you don't do anything to encourage it. Strange as it sounds, any extra attention you pay her will be encouraging it. I think if she brings it up even one more time you should tell her that this is going to cause you to have to find her another teacher. She probably admires you enough that it would stop her right away. Also make sure that you are never alone with her and never touch her where it could even be questionable what you are doing (which is probably hard as a martial arts teacher). And talk about your family a lot, and maybe even have your daughter around sometime when she is there and she can see that you are more of a father than a boyfriend for someone her age.
2006-06-18 18:07:37 · answer #1 · answered by dashizzle 2 · 9⤊ 0⤋
oh man.... dude, i studied martial arts for years, and that happened a few times with the juniors there (not just to me). i'm a guitar instructor, and i've had the same issues. its rough being one on one with some teenaged girl who cant stop giggling and keeps hinting at semi-inappropriate things. i'd say just dont respond to it at all. pretend it doesnt exist. you dont want to hurt her feelings, but you probably will if you talk about it, and that might just lead to worse conversations with her parents. if you bring it up first they might think that you've been thinking about their daughter in some weird way. i'd leave it alone unless she actually says something to you along the lines of "i really like you" or whatever. and even then, i'd probably say "i like you too.... you're a good student, you remind me of my daughter." or something. and if she does say something like this, you should make sure you talk to her parents BEFORE she talks to them, because if she spins the story around they're gonna blame you. have her sit down until they come in to get her, and then say "katie, please tell your mother what you told to me earlier" or whatever her name is.
wanna know what's worse? when you have a 14 year old student who has a crush on you, and so does her mom. they come in to the store when i'm not teaching just to hang around. they're both super nice ppl, and they never cross any lines, but it can be uncomfortable at times, and the other guys at the store make fun of me relentlessly.
2006-06-18 08:11:09 · answer #2 · answered by hellion210 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
is there another instructor that can teach her ? If not don't get in a situation that you and her are alone,if possible have as many students around just in case.
If she makes some false accusation your A$$ is grass,
Be real careful ! !
2006-06-18 15:19:36 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well psychologically, it may be because of watching a person continuously for long time each day.... the lessons are taught... the focus is warranted, and may be the subject is not finding an appeal, and then the mind becomes subjective, and starts focusing on the person subjectively, instead of the subject taught...
2016-05-20 00:37:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell her firmly, but gently, before it goes too far, that you are only her teacher, and do not want any relationship with her. You may have to tell her several times.
Hope
2006-06-18 09:20:40 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would say that this is a hard situation to deal with. i would work with her, but be very careful. if the crush continued i would speak to her parents.
2006-06-18 08:06:54 · answer #6 · answered by hw 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
try to nourish her in a fatherly manner....make her respect u the same way she does with her father.....then u'll have a father daughter relashonship..no crush here...i hope
2006-06-18 08:05:35 · answer #7 · answered by sphinx 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋