i feel useless in my life , what can i do to make my live go better ?

Question

im 29 years old , jobless, feel im useless. and my mum always say that. i have try so many kind of job, such as sales personel in real estate, promoter, waiter, direct sales distributors, and many...
i only graduated high school don't even have a diploma certificate.
i always think what can i do in my live, how to build my own career... i'm so upset , feeling bad. i always try hard to achieve my career goal, but always fail. i have no passion on my job... don't know why...i don't like my job... i use to choose sales personel because they don't really need a certificate, it depends on how smart we are, and how hardworking we are. i feel bad in my life.But i always read many success story like 'think n grow rich' 'rich dad n poor dad ' series... i always try hard to move on..im not come from a rich family..they can't help me, i have to make it myself..so hard,so difficult. i never earn $2000 above ( monthly salary ) in my life..i always poor..a real poor guy..

i have no money in my saving account..always lack of money..

Answer 1

Look. Life isn't easy and failure is a part of life. It is an inevitable fact. Yes, I too have had my share of setbacks and mistakes and yes, failures.

But because I fail, doesn't mean that I am a failure.

The worst thing to do, is to fail and NOT learn from those failures.

Please re-read this.

To me, it sounds like you have tried to do a lot of things since graduating from high school, but you are missing the larger point. If you don't have a high school diploma -- actual diploma then expend EVERY bit of energy getting a G.E.D.

Once you have a diploma or G.E.D., not a Certificate of Attendance, attend a small community college to get your feet wet and SHARPEN your mind. You are not stupid -- so stop beating yourself up. You are smart enough to realize that these sales jobs and everything else do not allow you to live "comfortably" and that is all most American's really want.

You have to focus, SCHEDULE your time by commiting to completion of the community college program or Devry or ITT (no - home training programs though), and commit to your future which will require you to dedicate yourself to obtaining the education and/or training appropriate for you.

Trying to skate by with a high school diploma in an information-based society that rewards degrees (vocational, associate's, bachelor's, masters & licenses from state authorities) is a recipe for a disaster.

The instability you see in your life now is a symptom of the larger problem -- lack of FORMAL education and/or training. And once again, lack of "formal" education does NOT mean that you are stupid. It just means that you have decided to avoid going to an accredited program to further enhance, develop, and sharpen your marketable skills.

You can get a formal education any time in your life and since you are 29, you have a whole life ahead of you to get it and show the employers what you are made of!

Find your passion - whether vocational or educational and hit the books!

If you still are confused, try the "Occupational Outlook Handbook" at any public library. It will give you a myriad of career choices to think about and it tells you the education required and the average starting salary for various careers.

Remember, success doesn't happen overnight--despite what you see in the classifieds or in commericals. It is a process that starts with sharpening EVERY tool in your toolbelt. You must sharpen your mind and your skills to remain marketable.

Good luck

Answer 2

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Answer 3

I think everyone feels this way at some point in their life. I have struggled with off and on depression for a long time and I fully understand what you mean about wanting to disappear. But all you can do is stay strong. You said you love your family; that's great. Spend time with them and let their company distract you from the negative feelings you have. I know you have probably heard this a million times but enjoy being young, as hard as that is. Being a teenager truly is so tough. But before you know it, you will have so much responsibility and it will stay that way for the rest of your life. So for now, have fun! Do whatever cheers you up. Try getting a new hairstyle or buy a new shirt. Maybe get excited about what you want to study in college and make a career out of Who knows, maybe that will give you the confidence you need to make some friends. But if you can't, it's not the end of the world. My parents always told me "friends come and go, but family is forever". While I always liked my friends, I knew from an early age that they were not the most important thing in life. What is important is remembering that this tough time WILL pass. Trust me, just be as positive as you can. Smile as much as you can and tell yourself that you are happy even if you aren't. Soon, your mind will believe it and you will really feel happy. If there are deeper issues, such as abuse, mental illness, drugs, etc. find the help you need. Talk to the people you need to talk to. Best of luck.

Answer 4

Most people who are frustrated with their work can find help in a pragmatic solution - more pay, more flexible hours, or a nicer boss who recognizes their efforts. But many people also have philosophical and existential doubts that rack them. It's a deeper question for them, because they want to relate to their work on a deeper level. Nobody can tell you what you should do with your life. Therefore, counseling is a gentle art. When I counsel people who are in transition, I tell them, "You make good decisions by avoiding the misperceptions, fears, and fallacies that lead people to make bad decisions." And, "If you keep these misperceptions from clouding your perspective, your path to insight will be clear." Therefore, here are the The Top Fifteen Mistakes which lead people to decisions they regret, or which keep them from taking the step they ought to take.

15. The Fallacy of Thinking "It's Too Late"
(read the chapter Out of My Mind)

14. The Failure to Distinguish between "A Day Job" and "A Good Day Job"
(read the chapter Lady Reads the News)

13. The Failure to Embrace a Good Situation because you're waiting for "Mr. Right" (the Great Situation)

12. The Phi Beta Slacker Problem
(read the chapter The Phi Beta Slacker Dances for Herself)

11. The Failure to Look Under the Bed
(read the chapter Have You Looked Under the Bed)

10. A Generation that can't see the Virtue and Nobility of Sacrifice and Compromise - your responsibilities don't keep you from your purpose, they are part of your purpose. (read the chapter Accepting a Gift)

9. Failure to Consider the Moral Aspect of Work
(read the chapters Getting Oily, Then Even and Learning Delta Pride)

8. The Water Slide Hesitation - "Sure, I'm interested, but am I interested enough to devote the rest of my life to it?" - your desire only needs to be great enough to take the first step. From there, you see if your desire wanes or intensifies.

7. The Fear A Person Like You Doesn't Belong Around People Like Them
(read the chapter The Diver Who Loved to Read)

6. Guilt Stemming from Antiquated Notions of Class
(read the chapter The Ungrateful Soldier)

5. The Fallacy of Rational Analysis
(We are not robots. You can't just think your way to an answer. We are feeling beings. No analytical test can replace the necessity for discernment. Read the chapter The Brain Candy Generation)

4. The Fallacy of Seeing Meaning in Coincidence
(read the chapter Synchronicity or Not)

3. The Fallacy that How Much You Make is more important than How Much You Spend
(read the chapter Hunted by Her Cause)

2. The Fallacy of "First X, then Y"
(this refers to half the chapters in the book. People are afraid to fail at the thing they often would most love to do, so they divert into another profession to avoid ruining their dream)

1. The Fallacy of Intrinsic Fit
(It's not what you do, it's what you are working towards. Work satisfaction rarely comes from a perfect fit of the skills you have to the skills your job requires. All jobs have unpleasant elements - don't look for a job without unpleasant elements, but rather, look for a job that is worth doing such that the unpleasant elements are worth putting up with. Gain satisfaction from being able to do your work in a moral fashion.) The illustration below depicts the fallacy that a calling stems from a match of your skills to your job.

Answer 5

Okay, this one is a tough one. Whew!

First off, reading over other people's answers (up to this point) and I see a pattern that I agree with. Basically, it's all up to you. Direction, motivation, positivity, and values are all things that you need.

I particularly liked the answer where someone said that at 29 it's not what you make but what you can put on your resume that's important. That is very true.

I'm 30, and just recently started into a job that I plan on advancing in. Before that, I was listless and disillusioned, and I drifted from crappy job to crappy job. I even went to Asia for a couple of years to try my hand at teaching English! I hated that, but I did enjoy the teaching aspect of it. I guess I just disliked the kids...who knows.

When I came back to Canada, I was certain that it would be the same story, that is, drifting from job to job just to pay the bills. But because of my teaching experience, I landed a great job as a corporate trainer, teaching adults all the things they need to work at my company. I love this job! It's a career choice that I literally blundered into!

Moral of the story? Listen to these other people, because with direction you can at least get an idea of what you like, with motivation you can go after some of those goals, with positivity the crap that life throws at you won't get you down so easily, and with some good values you won't need to sell your soul to make ends meet. Umm, did I get all that out right? I hope so.

Answer 6

I can totally sympathize because I feel the exact same way. Your story reads almost exactly like mine.

One thing you might be lacking is purpose and direction. A way to find that is to zero in on a career goal. Going from job to job can be hard. Since our job partly defines who we are, when we can't find the right job it's like we can't find ourselves. It sounds like you are in the wrong career since you don't like the one you have.

Do you have another career joal in mind?

Okay, so let's put money out of the picture. Easier said than done right? (Don't think that this advice is coming from some rich ***** who's got her life together. I'm still struggling, too. I've got literally $0 in my account and over $500 in bills due. I'm unemployed and still waiting for interviewers to call me back. My parents aren't rich either. So there!) Now that you're not thinking about money, what would you really like to do with your life? What did you want to do when you grew up when you were a child? Don't worry if the answer doesn't come quick. It took me 1 1/2 years of soul searching and journal writing to sort it all out.

I worked at a number of unsatisfying office jobs full-time and several part-time retail jobs that made me miserable. I don't have a college degree either.

Does it get better? It can. But the success comes from finding your own fulfillment, not necessarily from material successes.

Answer 7

Son, don't listen to your Mom. That might be her way to encourage you, but it's not the right way. Only listen to positive encouragement.

Any employer can call your high school to verify your diploma that's a non-issue.

Get two jobs!! You can make more than $24k a year. McDonalds will hire you. You can be the manager if you prove yourself. They earn $35k a year. Work at night stocking shelves at a grocery store. Or, work part-time at UPS -- they give benefits to part-timers.

Have a plan.Save your money until you have a deposit for an apartment. Move out of your parents house. Get some self respect. Stand on your own two feet. You'll feel better.
Make friends at work. Find a roommate to share expenses. Find a girl. Prove you're worthy. Work hard, you'll move up in one of your jobs.

Good luck.

Answer 8

james,
I know just how you feel. i have been there myself. i believe the answer starts with god. if you put him first in your life he will absolutely bless you with the opportunity you crave. past that always make sure that your career efforts are based in an area that you have some passion about. if you don't feel like your efforts are worth while then you will never put forth the effort required for success or even apreciate the rewards that you do get. also remember that ANYTHING worth while will require sacrafice and determination.....to give you an example of this...i work in direct sales. the other day i had to drive 100 miles to an appointment that ended up horribly. the next appointment was close but my directions seemed wrong.. i called the office but couldn't get through. this went on for an hour and with tears in my eyes i just wanted to go home and quit.....but i wouldn't do it. AND i finally walked into a sale that netted 750.00 in 2 hours

Answer 9

Well, I would say first you need to have positive approach in life...how much you earn at the age of 29 or at the starting really doesnt make difference....how much information or how much exposure you getting in your job or work is more important...i personally feel that in initial stages of life you need to work for exposure and experience and not for money...so dont bother how much money you getting just concentrate on what you are doing....and qualification really doesnt matter as long as you are smart...we have lot of examples in India where people are just passed out from school, but becasue they have ability to learn from every circumstances, and because they were honest and hardworking, they are successful in their path...

So i would just advice you to concentrate and work hard on your present job...learn as much as you can without thinking how much money you are getting...if possible with work try to persue with studies also which can help you in better way in future..and always have "I can do" or Positive attitute...

so here you gooooooooooooo.................

Best luck!!!

Answer 10

I'll tell you what I did. I logged on to ashworthcollege.com
I am now taking my associates degree online, on my own time. It's easy. Payments are as low as $39 a month. I just got done with my first semester. There are all sorts of courses to choose from. Take a maintenance course, apartment maintenance is a good choice cuz you can sometimes find a job that you live on site and your rent is free so you can save money up and not feel so broke. Good luck to you!