im a married man and im in love with a mrrried women, she too loves me lot .we have been phyisically involved and there are no chances of going back but we keep fighting coz we dont trust each other , we both are scared we will leave each other and go back to our real partners, what do we do to allways trust each other and live happyly for ever allthough being saperate?
2006-06-17 23:15:55 · 19 answers · asked by smartsin2k 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
what? why dont u both leave ur real partners and be with each other, if this is what you want? thats real selfish, what you both are doing?
2006-06-17 23:20:23 · answer #1 · answered by Jess 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you've really messed up............. how do you have a relationship with no trust? answer, you don't , you fight. and you know why theres no trust? because you two are both still married......... Will you wake up one day and wonder if shes cheating on you after you are together? will she wake up one day and wonder if you are cheating on her ? Until both of you are divorced the fighting will go on. you say theres no going back, but until you are divorced theres always the chance you could, you both realize that even if you dont want to admit it. the next question is are there children involved? if there are i urge you to reconsider your moves because sure as rain this will mess them up. the first thing kids think when divorce comes up is "what did i do to make this happen?" "Doesn't mommy or daddy love me?" and then you
have to look them straight in the eyes and explain why you arent going to be a fulltime parent any more. Talk about hard? thats the
hardest, when you have to sit down and hurt them like they've never been hurt before
2006-06-17 23:35:17 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You both obviously aren't happy in your marriages or you wouldn't have let this happen. Now if feels like it has gone past the point of no return and even though you feel you love this person you cannot feel secure with them as your relationship is based on deception. I don't know if you have children but I would image that you would feel as if you are also letting your families down with this deception. You aren't leaving your spouse but won't give up your lover either. You must decide what you truly want and begin again, It will not be easy but you cannot keep up this deception forever, it will only eat away at you. The end result will be that you will lose your partner and your lover.
2006-06-17 23:43:26 · answer #3 · answered by clarence 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both of you probably know that you are WRONG to cheat on your spouses. Why don't you just confess to your spouses that you no longer want to be married to them and get out of your committments to each other in a straightforward and honest way? If both of you are already cheating, I do not blame you for being scared and not trusting each other: you are both cheaters!
You will never be happy together because you have never really been TOGETHER. Sex is not a substitute for trust, committment, honesty and loyalty to your mate. Stop living a lie and get real.
2006-06-17 23:26:42 · answer #4 · answered by Jess4rsake 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You don't. A relationship based on betrayal and dishonesty to another (the spouses), will always be clouded with doubt and mistrust. It is an indication of what you are capable of doing if something better comes along or feelings resurface. If you know someone is capable of cheating on someone they have made a commitment to, then you know they are capable of cheating on you. Being faithful to someone you love has less to do with love than it does with integrity, respect and loyalty. If you want to be with another, be honest up front and make a clean break of who you are with. Fresh starts and fidelity are your best choice. Good luck.
2006-06-17 23:24:16 · answer #5 · answered by Heather S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
R u 16?
2006-06-17 23:17:35 · answer #6 · answered by Preeti 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You wanna stay with your spouses but be together? Is that right? If you two are truly IN LOVE with each other, then take a leap of faith and both get divorced and be together.
2006-06-17 23:17:44 · answer #7 · answered by smurfette_au2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG it's me and my husband all over again! that's what happened to us a long time ago.
the distrust is because you are still married to your own spouses right now. after divorcing them, it will get better. that's a promise. i know you are going to get answers about you shouldnt be cheating in the first place, but i will admit when i am wrong, and i admit it. i cheated on my first husband and divorced him. now me and my current husband are very much in love after a long time of healing (past abusive relationship) and things keep getting better.
it will get better after you divorce your spouse. but make sure of what you are doing is not just lust first.
2006-06-18 00:47:09 · answer #8 · answered by Tracey E 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Impossible.
2006-06-18 04:30:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are hurting each other and your families and you dont trust because you both see each other as cheaters and will do it again
Heal your marriages and stop this foolishness
Good Luck and God Bless!!
2006-06-17 23:17:43 · answer #10 · answered by msqtech 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋