She shuts me out and isolates me, telling me that i had my chance (which she never communicates to me) and tells me to live with it. She says that she is done trying to work things out and that she will just do here thing and I should just do mine, so that we can just stay together for the kids. My wife can be vey unforgiving and callous, which makes for everyone to walk on eggshells when around her, in fear of making her upset. She sits around and tells my kids to clean, while she sits on a bed and plays video games. My kids resent her, but they love their mom. I have tried going to counseling, but each time the counselour got close to the problems, my wife would shut me out and stop going or would not go with me to counseling, she would go by herself. I thought one on one would help, but instead it turned into some type of womens group that did nothing for our marriage. My wife yells at me and gets in my face from time to time. What can I do? I want my family ....
2006-06-17 19:57:05 · 11 answers · asked by kellyschwabb 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Take my advice! Dump that worthless ***** as soon as possible!
2006-06-17 21:38:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she refuses counseling then i would think there is only one solution: settle things in court.
Whatever has been going on will all come out there and someone else will settle it while putting the best interest of your kids first.
And don't say that you don't want to put your kids through a custody dispute, they are already suffering in this situation and going to court to begin divorce and custody proceedings may provide the opportunity to get them some help.
Very often a family court judge will ORDER the family into counseling. Especially if your wife refuses to go -- the judge can absolutely force her.
2006-06-17 20:22:56 · answer #2 · answered by mamabunny 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried family counseling? Although I can sympathize that you are hurt by your wife's actions, it sounds she is making the entire family uncomfortable, and I worry about how your kids are coping with this. If they could have a place to be able to speak about how they feel, maybe that would hit home for your wife.
Did something occur that makes her resentful towards you? It sounds like she is harboring a lot of anger and resentment towards you. I would try again at counseling and see how it goes.
2006-06-17 20:04:37 · answer #3 · answered by jerkygirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When someone get united in the name of marriage, it takes a lot of hardwork to work things out.. It is a compromise between the two of you. It is a matter of give and take.
If one is the only one who give and compromise and somebody is the one just take and take, things will never work out.
The best ingredients in marriage is being able to communicate with one another. Talk to your wife for once, let her do everything she wants, let her talk everything..let her scream, shout out you, just dont mind it.. Never walk away.. Because walking out the problem cannot resolve even just one thing..
Sometimes woman have difficulty on telling things..and you need to insist that she needs to be open to you, for the sake of the family..
I think there is something in you that you too both need to resolve. Sometimes, we always think that only one has the problem at all, and you cannot see yourself because no body was telling you.
There is no harm to try to communicate to your wife, know her reasons, I know there is something for sure...And be ready whatever she tells you..
Just dont forget to always tell her that you always love her..
I hope this helps..
2006-06-17 20:31:02 · answer #4 · answered by just me 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have just described my Husband's first wife to a tee. He took it, and took it, but finally made the decision to leave. He now basks every day in my love and our happiness and wonders why the hell he put up with it for so long. You are miserable and presenting an appalling vision of marriage to your children. Get out and find someone who loves you.
2006-06-18 10:45:39 · answer #5 · answered by Kitty 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
it seems as if you wife might not be in love with you any more but she wants you to be a fanily for the kids and that is great but take it from me it can hurt them just as much if you 2 are fighting or not close you have to look out for you and your children take care i wish you luck
2006-06-17 20:27:34 · answer #6 · answered by crazyforcoke34 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Am sorry to hear about your sittuation. but i'm going to be honest with you, i dont think that your wife loves you any more. its just the way she is treating you, i dont think you or the kids deserve that. if you ask me i think that she is having an affair. i know that you want your family but who doesn't. but there is no such thing as a perfect marriage.
2006-06-17 20:10:19 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you haven't already tried, try to sit with her one on one and tell her how you feel, give her the rundown on what she does to you, make her realize what she is doing by playing her role. It sounds to me that she wears the pants in the house when it should be equal.
2006-06-17 20:05:13 · answer #8 · answered by Monique G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave her. You can't stay with someone just because you have kids. Thats ridiculous and a waste of your life. Find someone who you'll be in love with, who'll make you happy.
2006-06-17 20:46:49 · answer #9 · answered by smurfette_au2000 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
do you want to have a miserable life? we only live once! tell her, counseling and change or else.
2006-06-17 20:07:30 · answer #10 · answered by Discovery 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋