I have been w/ my beau for 4 weeks now. On week 3 we had sex for the first time. My cousin who set us up, found out, and has proceeded 2 give me her opinion. She says that I am sad, as in pathetic, and whorish to have sex with a guy so fast. As a young man I would expect him to perhaps mention what we had done to his friends as would I. Sharing of secrets=bonding, you know that whole thing? Evindently however, his friend could not keep it himself, which is how my cousin found out. She says the only reason she knows is b/c when females give it up to guys as easily as I did they talk about it. I understand that to be actively conversating, not a mere mention. Which is what he told me he did w/his friend. He & I have spoken about it. The length of time it took me, I intiated the sex, is not a matter of concern to him. However my cousin and I are not speaking b.c she thinks Im a whore, & if this fails its my fault. I think shes too judgmental & should mind her buisness.
2006-06-17 18:44:59 · 13 answers · asked by Roma 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
The relationship between my bf and I continues to carry on nicely. I dont see why how fast we had sex should matter. We are of age and thats our buisness. However, I do understand that everyone is entititled to their opinions. But is an opinion reason enough for family to become distant?
2006-06-17 18:48:24 · update #1
Sex is a personal thing. If you feel it was that time and are comfortable with it... forget her. I mean really what she does and you do are different... period doesn't mean that it is right or wrong. Now if you were walking around saying... I feel like such a whore it would be a different story. Now if you and him are cool... then keep it that way and tell them to mind their buiness.... maybe she needs more in her life
2006-06-17 18:49:34 · answer #1 · answered by Kelé 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i agree with you, your cousin needs to keep quiet when it comes to spreading the gossip around, although it sounds like you are close enough to share each others experiences and feelings. i think there needs to be a sit down so you can express the way you feel betrayed by what looks like back stabing. if you can't get any satisfaction i would suggest never confiding with your cousin again. but what ever happens remember you made the best choice for yourself at the time, with the information you had. you will get through this. people have short memories if they don't maybe you could say something along the lines of "until the time comes when any of you that has an opinion about me has their **** together then maybe i'll be interested in what you have to say , but until then i would appreciate it if you did not bother me with your unsolicited opions" . just because someone cares about you does not mean they can't hurt you with gossip.
2006-06-18 02:05:26 · answer #2 · answered by princesscopperhead 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is hard. First think about what she said. Is right to think like that. Men who talked aren't men I think he just wanted sex. Doesn't matter with who. If he really respect you he would never say nothing about that. But that doesn't make you a whore, you are just getting in the Jungle of the life, Think from now on what is more important for you the guy or your dignity. And DON'T FORGET BLOOD IS MORE HEAVY THAN BLOOD. Your cousin just love you so much and don't know how to help you. She don't want you to suffer.
2006-06-18 01:52:59 · answer #3 · answered by speedy girl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that there is a specific time limit on when you have sex with someone. If you and he were ready then that is all that matters. Sounds to me like your cousin is jealous and you should try to understand that maybe she feels this way. Also, I would talk to your boyfriend and ask him to leave the two of you's personal life between you guys until you know what is going on with her. Your sex life is not something that you want your family to be discussing at the next holiday. Good luck!
2006-06-18 01:51:59 · answer #4 · answered by Nikki H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell your cousin to mind her own business. It's your life, you choose what you want to do. If you are of age then it shouldn't be a problem. Sex is natural and fun with the right person, there is nothing wrong with sex! Waiting 3 weeks is quite long in my opinion. I honestly don't think i'd be able to hold out that long, so props to you! Have you ever thought she is jealous?
2006-06-19 13:12:07 · answer #5 · answered by pure_xtc_2004 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is in no way her business and concern. So if she shares her opinion, I would simply explain- "Thank you for sharing ur opinion, You're feelings are important to me, but in tne end. This is my desicion and I'd like it if you honored my space and my choices." What I know is that we make desicions in relationships and sometimes forget the importance of other people in our lives. Do what you feel is right girl. No one gets to tell you how to live. Go with ur gut, but still maintain your relationship with your cousin. Think win win-
2006-06-18 01:54:48 · answer #6 · answered by Passionately Vulnerable 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your using protection and your okay w/your choice to do the wild thing then i see nothing wrong. but, it does depnd on you and his age. I say when planning to be married you probably shoud experience some pleasur in each other. It's like this: would you buy a new car without tring it ouy first?
2006-06-18 01:53:15 · answer #7 · answered by jackson51 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well that was to soon. Shes right. But she should mind her own business. Its your life
2006-06-18 01:50:00 · answer #8 · answered by churppy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Only you can make her right. what do you feel that you are? Pick it and stick with it and who give a d#$m what she thinks.tell her to get a life and stop trying to live yours. remember it's your thing do what you want to do.
2006-06-18 01:55:44 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um, I don't want you to hate me or anything but i sort of agree with your cousin.
2006-06-18 01:47:00 · answer #10 · answered by DisneyLover 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋