if love is supposed to be a good thing, why does it hurt so bad?

Question

i have been married over 4 years. my husband has changed so much in the way that we always argue over stupid stuff. he will call me names and he never used to. he has an explosive temper and breaks things. he used to wake me up in the morning by saying i love you over and over again, but now, he barely ever responds when i say it to him. what the hell happened? i ask him if he loves me, and he'll just give me this look like i'm retarded, give a whole list of stuff that he does for me, then says, "what do you think?" he's very sarcastic when he says, "no i don't love you. i just go to work and bust my a@@ every day for the hell of it...."

Answer 1

Because we have the strongest feelings about those that we love, so things hurt us more than they would if someone else did them. That's why those we love can cause us the most pain. We have a lot more invested in them.

Well, it sounds like something has changed drastically. Are you sure that he is the only one that has changed? You may want to look at your behavior as well to see if there's something that may have provoked the start of his changes.
However your behavior changed though, there is no excuse for him to call you names or belittle you in that manner. Let him know that you love him, but you also care about yourself and you won't take abuse from him.
Just remember, you are responsible for your own feelings, he can call you names, but he can't make you feel inferior. You have to allow him to do that.
If you feel you want to stay and make your marriage, it may help for the 2 of you to see a marriage counselor.
Whatever you do, don't stay w/ somebody who is abusive and certainly don't bring children into the marriage if the violence and hateful language continue.
Best of luck, I hope that everything works out for you.

Answer 2

If you truly love a person you don't have expect a love in return coz love works in a miraculous way. Love do hurts though but it doesnt mean that because your hurt love is not a good thing already. Maybe that person whom you love is not worth it for that love from you so you have to take those hurt as a lesson and a challenge on your part not to give up love.

Answer 3

LOVE is a good thing, however because people have emotional attachments and bonds it causes us to hurt inside. When you truly love someone it is impossible to not go without disappointment and sometimes pain. Just enjoy the time and good memories that you do have and when you get hurt remember that the pain will go away with forgiveness.

Answer 4

Love can be good if you are both working on the relationship and you are loved back, it hurts when it seems you are the only making the effort and the person just isn't into you. Move on and found someone who will be.

Answer 5

Love is a wonderful thing to have in life. It hurts, because the person that u love just dont have those feelings back, but you just have to find away to get past that, because u well always love agian. I hope I have help you

Answer 6

So you FELL in love did you? Just when was the last time you fell it didn't hurt? Try slowing down and first find out if you feel in love. If not make a better decision.

Honestly though, be yourself and make you your best friend. You would never make a bad decision for your best friend.

Answer 7

There is no such thing as perfect, so you will always run into disagreements. If you hurt more than love in a relationship, it's time to call it quits. Lifeis too damn short to be in so much pain!!!1

Answer 8

The best way is not to love anybody before you get married.Its so hard.and I personally cant stay out of the love area.

Answer 9

Always serious injuries hurts bad. Real Love is a serious injury to the heart. if someone breaks it hurts bad, really bad!!

Answer 10

Love hurts.