My boyfriend and I went on a short 2 hour trip. It was myself, my boyfriend and his best friend Mark. The 3 of us went to visit his friend Steve and his wife Jay. Anyway, to make a long story short, my boyfriend and I got into an argument at Steve's house because i told my boyfriend that I wanted to head home a little early on Sunday because it was Father's Day and i wanted to take my dad out to eat. check out at the hotel is 12 pm which is fine with me. i only want to be home by 2 or 3 pm on sunday. Anyway, he got pissed at me cause he said that I'm putting him on schedule and I should not have gone on the trip if I wanted to spend sunday with my dad. So I was pissed when he said that so i said he shouldn't have invited me, because I told him several days ago that I wanted to be home by Sunday afternoon. Anyway, he said if I left he didn't care. So I left him and his friend there. Now they're stranded. Am I wrong for that or not?
2006-06-17 17:35:52 · 27 answers · asked by DeeBee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
He doesn't celebrate Father's Day, so he doesn't care. I told hime that he should respect the fact that i celebrate it!!! He tends to be this way about alot of things. It's been 5.5 years together. We've had some really good times and for the most part he's actually a good guy, but with the combination of how he acts sometimes plus the "no ring yet because my dad needs my financial help" (long story), I'm kinda ready to call it quits!! Help me!!
2006-06-17 17:46:58 · update #1
well, i didn't go back home, I just went back to the hotel. This happened at like 11 pm, I wasn't driving home alone in the dark!!! Should I not get him in the morning? or just go home?
2006-06-17 17:54:27 · update #2
No your not wrong for leaving. The suggestion that I have is the initial outcome of making that decision. this means on both parts. His knowingly that his threat would automatically created a reaction, but unsuspectingly get some action thru him off guard. First of all he is empowered with his friend there. thinking" She will never leave", and of course, being the manly man that he is needs to demonstrate in front of his friend, just got crushed. So the friend does not want to get involved, thinking "that they will work things out." So, lets not forget, you left them stranded, great move I think, Now you were, ( reading this), I feel that your intentions were not to leave them stranded, or to get into a fight, but to in trust that the previous discussion on this trip, (arrangements, timing etc.) had already been decided, with no future confrontations. Well, in turn, what hap pended, you had mentioned the initial timing of this trip, and of course as just a reminder, since a friend came along, you wanted to feel secure, that your previous commitment with your father day activities, will be understood and respected. Your angry hoping he would "chase after you, saying,"I'm sorry honey," He's thinking" oh she doesn'tunderstand me, we can find away home" Well, I want to know the final chapter, Good Luck , P.S. It's all a power play, but don't give in to there effortless conquest of thinking that you need him. but your intital result, is the caring, giving, understand, and respect that well all deserve and want
2006-06-17 18:02:26 · answer #1 · answered by candlemia 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think all that really happened here was that you and your boyfriend had different ideas about what was to be expected over this weekend. You mentioned ahead of time to him that you wanted to be back for father's day and he should have respected that fact and went back with you early. but however i don't really know if it was right for you to just up and leave him. I think that it was selfish of him to do what he did. I don't think that this is something that you should leave him for. what i think you need to do is go pick him up after you eat with your dad and tell him that you are sorry for leaving him, but you told him a while before the trip you wanted to eat with your dad and that hopefully next time things will get planned out a lot better.
2006-06-17 17:45:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion you took the correct approach. Relationships are about compromising. You mate refused to do that and took the immature route. I'm glad your home to spend time with your father and don't let this incident ruin your time. Life is too short, let it go and focus on a nice time with your dad. I don't have a father so don't take it for granted. Talk to your mate when he is ready to be mature and open minded.
2006-06-17 17:50:52 · answer #3 · answered by Kenya_7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
youre right and wrong at the same time. youre right in the sense that you told him long before hand about this and that he shouldnt have reacted like that. but sadly heres where you made a mistake: if you wanted to spend time with dad you shouldnt have gone at all. why? because you can never be sure whats gonna come along your way (ex: accident, traffic etc.) it would be okay for you to leave early and independently but whats worse is that you had only one form of transport. its not fair to cut his time short. in a way since you couldnt leave independently without screwing them over you were pressuring his time. you have to learn to pick your battles with everything including time--you cant have everything...
2006-06-17 17:42:01 · answer #4 · answered by Psyche M 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hun i am very proud of you. YOU did right. You told him days ahead of time that you had other plans for Father's day and he just totally ignored it and was selfish and uncaring. You dont need anyone like that. Tell him to hit the road and the horse he rode in on and never cross your path again. You dont need any one like that. YOU deserve better. Go enjoy your life and have fun. You will find someone better out there
2006-06-17 17:40:00 · answer #5 · answered by silvereagle1125 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's hard to say. We all know fights and arguments happen in relationships its part of life and growing. Blah Blah...We do things and say thing we don't mean.Time is more unforgiving than people... unfortunately. Give it awhile til things claim down. If this is a common recurrence and similar stuff like that ... you might need to reevaluate the relationship.
2006-06-17 17:46:46 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
NO! your boyfriend shouldn't have put you in that type of situation... your dad is the most important guy in your life regardless if you have a boyfriend, husband or friend..... your boyfriend was in the wrong place... don't back down off of it.... stay strong... if your boyfriend really cares he will realize what HE did was wrong!
2006-06-17 17:38:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You probably shouldn't have stranded them. Other than that, just try to wait the whole thing out. If he can forgive you for leaving him behind, you should forgive him for the whole fight. Give it a couple of days and see how everyone feels.
2006-06-17 17:38:51 · answer #8 · answered by Maggie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I mean u not wrong because u told him that u wanted to spend father's day with your father n he should undersatnd that so no u did the right thing.
2006-06-17 17:38:39 · answer #9 · answered by Patrice H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I respect that. He opened his mouth and told you to go. It's his own fault. Steve will see that he gets home alright.
It's good to see a woman that will stand up for herself.
2006-06-17 17:40:43 · answer #10 · answered by my_alias_id 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋