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I have been raising my daughter for 13 years with no word from her father and no support. My daughter just met her grandma for the first time today and I am scared that after all these years of nothing from him that he will try to get custody. My question is..Does he have any rights after 13 years of no contact, except for meeting her once four years ago and never calling again?

2006-06-17 15:22:55 · 17 answers · asked by bad11271 1 in Family & Relationships Other - Family & Relationships

17 answers

No, he cannot.First, he needs to establish paternity, since his name isn't on the birth certificate( wise move on your part,btw.).
Second ,he would be responsible all of that back child support.
Third,he would have to prove, in court that he's a fit enough parent to get custody.So if he has any criminal record, or skeletons in the closet, that will all work against him.
Fourth,you can file for removal of his parental rights on the grounds of abandonment.That ones a double edged sword,though.It means you're admitting paternity,and he will have to be notified of it.Unless you don't know where he is.Then you will need to post a notice in your local paper.
Your best bet would be to consult with a lawyer who specializes in Family Law(most do free consultations).
But from the sound of things, I wouldn't worry overmuch,if I were you.If you're a good parent,the law generally tends to favor the mother.Especially in the case of a daughter and an absentee parent.And after all this time, it'll only make his case that much weaker.

2006-06-17 15:34:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1 1

It would be pretty stupid of him to get involved at this point because it is more likely that he wouldn't get custody but would get a massive bill for back child support.
Did he know that this was his child even though you didn't put him on the birth certificate? He would have a better shot if he could get proof that you hid the fact that he was the father from him for 13 years. Of course, I am pretty sure that a judge would take into consideration the wishes of a 13 year old so unless you've done something to warrant losing custody I would be surprised if he could take your daughter away from you.

2006-06-17 22:30:05 · answer #2 · answered by KL 5 · 0 0

There isn't a Family Court in the nation that would award custody to this "deadbeat dad" unless, of course, he could prove that you are abusive to the child or that you smoke crack on a daily basis. I am in a similar situation. My son's mother decided, somewhere along the line, that she no longer wanted to be a mom. I do not have "legal custody" of the child but I am confident that if the situation should ever come to a head after all these years that any judge would award it to me. I never bothered to go through with the legal process because it has never been a problem. My son lives with me and I encourage family interaction with the people from his mom's side of the family.Advice?: Don't worry...it's important for your daughter to know her "entire" family. Encourage her to meet and know family members from her dad's side. Just because he's an asshole doesn't mean they are. You might be surprised to learn that many of them agree with you as to your feelings about him.

2006-06-17 22:49:10 · answer #3 · answered by 4nik8er 2 · 0 0

Is it possible? Anything is possible in the courts. However, take that with a HUGE grain of salt. He would have to prove paternity using a DNA test, prove he is financially, morally, and ethically capable of taking care of her. He would also have to prove you were an unfit parent that does not deserve custody (he would have to have physical and witness evident to prove it conclusively). The court would also probably involve your daughter in the decision making process (although not in court) and ask her about her father's involvement in her life. He would have to prove why he was unable and unwilling to support her for all these years, etc, etc. I mean, he would have a mountain to climb and get over legally. The possibilities of his success are between 0 and .1% (if he ever tried)

2006-06-17 22:50:33 · answer #4 · answered by snddupree 5 · 0 0

Yes, if he goes to your state's child support enforcement, he could force a paternity test, but then he's also risking being made to pay child support. Chances are after all these years, he's not going to get custody, unless you've done something to lose rights to your child.

2006-06-17 22:27:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

He will have no rights to your child unless he can prove you to be an unfit mother, which you probably aren't. I would stop worrying about it cause the chances that he all of a sudden would want to be a parent after all these years and the chances that the courts would let him do it are null and void.

2006-06-17 22:27:40 · answer #6 · answered by chrisgharr 3 · 0 0

While it is still possible to get visitation, no court is likely to give custody to someone the child has not had a relationship with for as long as you indicate.

2006-06-17 22:31:06 · answer #7 · answered by execglenn 2 · 0 0

he is the father so he can get custody if he wanted to but i dont think he would want to since he doesnt know your child that much. but he is a terrible father and u should go to court and make him pay for child support.

2006-06-17 22:26:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Unless you're a murderer, on drugs, selling yourself or something else awful this will never happen in a million years. Rest yourself and don't worry another minute. After all this time he's lucky they don't lock him up for non-support.

2006-06-17 22:28:34 · answer #9 · answered by daljack -a girl 7 · 0 0

get a really good lawyer, cause if i'm correct, he can try to get visitation, but if he can't prove you an unfit mother, he won't get full custody. the judge will most likely give him supervised visitations. it will mostly be up to your daughter where it goes from there, my heart is with you, good luck

2006-06-17 22:28:38 · answer #10 · answered by Naughty 2 · 0 0

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