Why am i not a confident person?

Question

I'm not very confident and wondered y this was. Is it because of the way i've been brought up? Every1 around me seems normal & is able 2 socialise better than i can y is this?

Answer 1

well it is cause you r waiting for the right person you are confident you just dont think so and don't compare yourself to others cause everyone is didffrent

Answer 2

You have a need for other people to like and admire you, and yet you tend to be critical of yourself. While you have some personality weaknesses you are generally able to compensate for them. You have considerable unused capacity that you have not turned to your advantage. Disciplined and self-controlled on the outside, you tend to be worrisome and insecure on the inside. At times you have serious doubts as to whether you have made the right decision or done the right thing. You prefer a certain amount of change and variety and become dissatisfied when hemmed in by restrictions and limitations. You also pride yourself as an independent thinker; and do not accept others' statements without satisfactory proof. But you have found it unwise to be too frank in revealing yourself to others. At times you are extroverted, affable, and sociable, while at other times you are introverted, wary, and reserved. Some of your aspirations tend to be rather unrealistic.

So you are normal. Act confident, then being confident will follow.

Answer 3

You doubt yourself too much. You don't love yourself as we all need to do in order to be confident. Start looking for the things about yourself that you would admire in someone else. List your traits, both good and not so good - and vow to work on those that are not up to par.
Define your beliefs and values and make a point to adhere to them at all times.

Keep yourself clean, neat and informed so you'll always be able to converse easily about many topics.

And while you're working on your self-esteem - fake it until you make it. Confidence is very attractive to both men and women.

Remember Dr. Phil says "we teach people how to treat us". By your openness and supposed confidence, people will begin treating you that way and it will help you even further to develop that wonderful characteristic.

Good luck. Remember courage is nothing but fear with wings.

Answer 4

It could be the way you talk to yourself.
The person you pay the most attention to is yourself. The things you say to yourself, you tend to believe without question. Unfortunately, too many people talk too negatively to themselves too much of the time.

The good news is that it's very easy to correct that problem. After all, you control what you say to yourself. So choose to be positive when talking to yourself. Rather than thinking "I'll never be able to do that" tell yourself "This is a great challenge that will bring out the best in me."

Have you ever offered words of encouragement to someone else? That's great! Remember to give yourself similar encouragement on a regular basis.

Let yourself know that you believe in you. Remind yourself that you are worthy and capable of the best life has to offer. You are your own best motivational speaker. Make a point to give yourself some positive encouragement every day. It will truly bring out the best in you.

Answer 5

Self-worth is the most important thing in life. Have you found your passion in life? That usually gives people self-worth. Maybe try a bunch of new hobbies or other things you're interested in, and then maybe that will help. Maybe you need to find yourself. Maybe you are surrounded by people who don't let you grow the right way, and don't let you follow your heart. Maybe you're brainwashed and need some time alone to figure things out.

I also had this problem. I felt like everyone was better than me, because I couldn't get good grades in school. So I couldn't talk to them, because I felt like I had nothing to be proud of. I felt like a waste of a human being. So, based on my experience, I would say it's finding what your talents are, is what will help you get past this.

Hope this helps.

Answer 6

some people are confident and some arent,i have a panic attack every time i have to speak to someone in public,it is so hard to lead a normal life,it seems to be all about pretending everything is fine and convincing yourself you can do things,i get flustered in shops too which is a nightmare because i love shopping.the answer is to remember nobody else knows you arent confident,only by the way you act so take a deep breath and pretend you are,everybody is the same.nobody is any better than you!!

Answer 7

Some of us are more shy than other folks! Please realise that sometimes even the people that appear the most confident are actually nervous too but just don't show it! It may be related to how you have been treated if you were often ridiculed in front of others. Do you always find it hard or is it easier sometimes than others?

Answer 8

there are a number of reasons maybe you just havent grown into your skin yet im not sure how old you are so i could be wrong but usually confidence comes with age or beauty or just the way some people are brought up if a child is constantly told how wonderful it is they will grow up believing that

Answer 9

It could be for many different reasons.
It might be low self esteem.
It might be you have been put down too many times in your life.
Far too many insults.
Maybe you feel inadequate.
Maybe you feel you have "0" worth as a person.
Good Luck With This.....Sincerely, Jerry

Answer 10

i had a very strict up bringing and i think that's what caused my problems,too many restrictions.
if you're not very confident you feel different than other people and in social situations seem to clam up,which in turn makes you feel worse.

Answer 11

yes i think its definitly something about the way you were brought up i am the same i dont have much confidence either