I've done Prozac....This is a while back when I was going through
psych/alcohol rehab. I guess the stuff works. Thought it make me kinda wound up . I thought it gave sense of euphoria at times.
A sensation I did not trust when I considered the circumstances.
I stopped taking meds altogether. Told shrink(nice guy from NYC) that I thought my best course of action would be to stay away from booze for a couple of years and then see where my head was at. Issues were being mixed up and I finally got it in my head that my main issue was alcohol.
I had been in psych/rehab a number of times previous to that and was looking for way to be sane drunk.
Didn't work.
read a book called Churchills Black Dog Kafkas Mice
here review of book
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Churchill's Black Dog
One of the things smart essayists do is read and ponder the writings of other essayists. Some time ago, I read a book by Anthony Storr titled Churchill's Black Dog, Kafkas's Mice & Other Phenomena of the Human Mind, in which Dr. Storr talked about the way the demons of certain historical figures become angels for the rest of us, since they impel their sufferers to rise above themselves - and we lesser mortals get taken along on their peculiar and soaring rides. He doesn't put it quite that way, but that's the idea. The principal figures he examines in some detail are Churchill, Kafka, and Newton; and since I find Churchill the most compelling, I'll recap some of Storr's essay while inserting my own thoughts and biases.
"Black Dog" was Churchill's name for his depression, and as is true with all metaphors, it speaks volumes. The nickname implies both familiarity and an attempt at mastery, because while that dog may sink his fangs into one's person every now and then, he's still, after all, only a dog, and he can be cajoled sometimes and locked up other times.
The man was in lustrous company - Goethe, Schumann, Luther, and Tolstoy to name but a few - all of them great men who suffered from recurrent depression. Who doesn't have at least a passing familiarity with the notion that depression sometimes acts as a spur to those of a certain temperament and native ability? Aware of how low they will sink at times, they propel themselves into activity and achievements the rest of us regard with awe.
Storr takes the approach that a "depressive nature" and feeling unloved goes hand in hand, and that Churchill's thinking he was unloved was a reasonable supposition, given his parents' neglect and disinterest. Step Two in Churchill's journey to leadership was compensatory, i.e., "If I can't be loved, I'll find a way to be admired." Another name for this decision is ambition, and the P.M's was apparently legendary. Ambition of such proportions is laden with fantasy - which, oddly enough, may have been exactly what was needed in that particular time, place, and circumstances. "The kind of inspiration with which Churchill sustained the nation is not based on judgment, but on an irrational conviction independent of factual reality. Only a man convinced that he had a heroic mission, who believed that, in spite of all evidence to the contrary, he could yet triumph, and who could identify himself with a nation's destiny could have conveyed his inspiration to others."
Another bit of fall-out from being unloved is hostility, and in a brilliant and amusing argument, Storr suggests that never has any depressive had such a wonderful opportunity for venting his aggressiveness as did Churchill. He had an enemy worthy of the word, an unambiguous tyrant whose destruction occupied him fully and invigorated him totally year in and year out. If all depressives could battle obvious and external wickedness in this way, they'd cease being depressed. To conclude: "...in 1940, his inner world of make-believe coincided with the facts of external reality in a way which very rarely happens... (he) became the hero that he had always dreamed of being. It was his finest hour. In that dark time, what England needed was not a shrewd, equable, balanced leader. She needed a prophet, a heroic visionary, a man who could dream dreams of victory when all seemed lost. Winston Churchill was such a man; and his inspirational quality owed its dynamic force to the romantic world of fantasy in which he had his true being."
http://www.mhsource.com/exclusive/chanceth0196.html
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What I got out of the chapter on Winston Churchill was.....
If Churchill was not kinda nuts England would be Province of German
Empire.American would be breadbasket of the Reich.
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I got issues that cropped up after I stopped drinking.
example:
I got the attention span of a gnat.
I used to be able to sit and read when I was drinking.
Not anymore....
I can barely sit still through a few pages.
Internet suits my temperament.
Jump from this to that to the other thing.
But I am not sure I would do a whole lot to remedy....I try to work with these tendencies.
ALL THEY WANT YOU TO DO IS BECOME GOOD WORKER BEE!!:):):)
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Watched "One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest" this past weekend.
On VCR from library....not edited TV version.
one of my favorite lines from that movie...
"you're no crazier than the average asshole walking down the street"
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you don't sound like whiney guy.
A whiney person would be taking more meds to try to offset the affects of another med.
And is that ever a slippery slope.
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I do Buddha mindful/cognitive behavioural.
My thinking can get quite circular...i.e closed loop.
And that can certainly ruin my day.
Buddha mindful kinda helps me stay more aware of what is going on in head.
re mastubation.
update porn collection.
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note:Churchill one of my favorite historical figures.
He was a bit daft.
Note: rooting out typos
2006-06-17 09:57:50
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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Prozac took the edge off my depression big time but it completely destroyed my sex drive. I'm off it a month or so now and my mojo is still out there somewhere. I can't be bothered having sex at all and when I do , I don't 'get there' if you know what I mean ? It's extrememely annoying and I have tried everything as I get jealous when my partner gets an end result and I don't.
2006-06-18 09:17:33
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answer #2
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answered by debisioux 5
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