Why is it that when something goes wrong like say the lawn mower is broken, my hubby takes it out on me?

Question

Does this happen to anyone else on here? Ugh! I'm so frustrated cuz it really seems as though we can't even have one full good day. There is always something for him to argue with me about! If this has happened to you how do you deal with it?

We've been married for 5 years now, but have been together for 8.

Answer 1

there's no excuse for that behavior, maybe you gave him a little too much patience -- so he comes to you to blame you, instead of blaming himself. he has issues. let him know you're offended by this. a man who loves a woman has respect for her, and the other way around.

Answer 2

This happens to me all of the time! I can never do anything right. At least that is how he makes me feel sometimes. I bully up to him and prove the point that it is not my fault. And usually he says he is sorry. Yet 20 min. later it happens again. I can not tell what to do. I can tell you that I only intend to deal with it for so long then I am out! We are going to be married 2yrs in Nov. but have been together for 4yrs. I do not want to live life this way so it is only a matter of time before something has to change!

Answer 3

If your relationship has always been this way, I don't understand whay you have tolerated it for so long. However if this is something that just recently started, there very well could be an underline problem that you are trying to ignore or your husband is hiding. You need to talk to your man and see what's really going on, if not I don't see how the situation will improve. If it's an option couples counseling would be a groovy idea.

Answer 4

well I'm in the same place as u ,but i just come out point blank and ask him what is Ur problem today that u are bringing it home and taking it out on me?and he usually comes out and replies and tells me he is sorry but it was a bad day.And i tell him leave it at the door don't bring it here!Or i just take a trip to the store and let him deal with is anger by himself.......to let him realize its him not me or my daughter that's the blame.good luck girl.

Answer 5

He's a cowardly snob.I f my hubby threw **** like that in my face I'd tell him to stop it and if theres no improvement kick the goat out. I can't waste my life on cheap $hit

Answer 6

He is doing this because he is not happy with in his work. He may not have climbed the ladder as far as he wanted. It makes him feel important when he puts you down. Try pushing him to do something with his life. Take him on holiday and get him to talk. He my not be aware he is bullying you to make himself feel better.

Answer 7

Tell your husband what he is doing and how it makes you feel. If he has not done this before he probably doesn't even know he is...Ever one gets frustrated some where along the line sometimes we pass it along to people unintentionally...

Answer 8

hmm... there can be plenty of reasons...
* hubby gets mad easily coz he thinks your his most effective outlet
* hubby takes these things out on you because he's a little lazy on his own
* hubby loves to argue maybe because you hardly get to "talk"

if i may give some advice, try talking to him. ask why. tell him you don't like it. be honest. you wouldn't want to repress these feelings and suddenly burst into a big fight!

Answer 9

Same boat, only reversed. I understand completely. It is not easy to ask for a normal day, which is sad and it gets really old.

Answer 10

it sounds like he doens't know how to cope with stress. Not that he would agree to it, but counseling might help him learn how to handle his anger. He might also have NO IDEA that he is doing this to you, but that when he gets upset, you are the first available target, and he thinks its OK.

If he won't go to therapy, you can to learn how to best diffuse him when he does this to you...