What is the main cause of tension between husband and wife?

Question

mistrust, sex, food, commitments, children, or what else.and how do you solve. please give true answer this may help many.

Answer 1

1. Lack of commitment and trust.

2. Lack of communication.

3. SELFISHNESS. Marriage is about two people sharing their lives so when one partner decides to pursue selfish personal desires irrespective of where their activities leave the rest of the family, then that's it- it tumbles down.

Answer 2

1. Money
2. Bills / debts
3. Mid Life Crisis
4. Work
5. Stress
6. Feeling of getting old

There are many reasons, a man could have tension, I suggest you talk to him and see what is bothering him the most, as it is more than 1 I bet.
But you take 2 of anyone of the ones you mentioned and I added to and that makes it a stressful event.
A marriage can withstand many things, but the key to making it last and not throw in the towel so to speak is communication.
Talk to him as I am sure it is nothing you both can't but your heads together and make it work:)
Then you have to set goals on h ow your going to achieve a less tension marriage :)
Make them simple and reachable, as if they are to high of a goal, you both will give up and both of you will throw in the towel.

EX: If it is money?

Create a current budget
Then look at it together and see where you can cut out some expenses you can do without.
Generate a new budget with those extra expenses gone and see how much money you have saved over the yr.
Secret to a new budget/lifestyle is DO NOT eliminate everything it will drive you nuts and you'll be back to square one again.
Start out simple and over time you will see how your saving money :)

Answer 3

I believe the top two sources of marital trouble is sex and money. I believe that solid, frequent, open communications between spouses is extremely important to work out problems. It may not always work, but I don't believe you have a chance at success at all without communications. After that it takes a willingness on each partner to realize there's a problem and have a true compromising desire to work towards a solution before it destroys the relationship altogether.

Answer 4

Lack of communication.

Not knowing what your partner is doing just lets that old imagination run wild with you. If you are having issues it just gets worse.

I've been married 13 years and found almost 1/2 our fights are from assumptions we've made about stuff.

As a example once when we were starting out (and poor!) She came home with a bag of stuff. Nothing costly but because we were pinching pennies I was mad she was "busting" our budget. Without talking to her I had asumed she'd spent our money. The truth was her girl friends had gotten her all the items.

If I had just asked how she had gotten them I could have saved some trouble.

Answer 5

Lack of money is the main cause of tension because it restricts the things you can do either as a couple or individually...this forces you together in a state of stress with no apparent way out...one person stressed is bad enough but both people stressed is a nightmare.

Very old scottish saying..."When debt comes in the door, love goes out the window".

Answer 6

Lack of money
loss of trust
heavy drinking
spending instead of paying bills
sex- not enough
sex-too much
not keeping the house clean
not looking after the kids
not learning to cook
(The last three apply to BOTH partners)

Answer 7

Tension between a husband and wife is lack of communication and trust.

Answer 8

hi ya the main tension in my marrige is our childern it was sex but i dont care to much if i dont get it were both to tired ... we have differnet ways in which we wanna bring up our childern .... for example im 23 and ive had a strick up bringin now i wanna bring them up with dicipline not being strick on them much as i had a hard time .id say i was quite relaxed with them too.... but my hubby 38 has had a relaxed do anything he wants life ..... now whenever i have a go a my eldst 5 . shes quite naughty if i have a go my hubby has a go at me which mean jess wins the battle hesklike this all the time and it really makes us argue ... we dont do it in frount of her i always confrount him whih then we argue.... i alwasy thinks it get resovled but it doesnt .....

Answer 9

to solve the tension, married couples need to talk all the time how they really feel not just what they think the other wants to hear.
communication,communication, communication is the key to relieving the tension, otherwise there is always tension.

Answer 10

Behaving as though you were still single.
Not taking decisions jointly.
Who spends time with the kids?
Bringing work (and its problems) back home
Living within the joint income
Running up debts
Selfish spending patterns eg drink problem, designer clothes