2006-06-16 21:11:10 · 7 answers · asked by woptie 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I don't think they can understand. Best to just file that in the taboo topics. Not because its a horrible event, but because they just don't understand why it hurt you so much. I also suggest therapy. Until you grow enough to forgive and move on, it will always hurt. That doesn't mean you have to let your abuser back into your life. If it was me, I know I'd not be able to go that far. I'd never want to person near me or my kids. But holding all that anger and rage inside only hurts you. If you family is on the side of the abuser and not the victim, maybe distance from them is the best. Don't surround yourself with people that demean your feelings and place you in a position to be around that abuser alot. That is just mean and hurtful. You can't pick your family, but that doesn't mean you have to like them or keep in touch.
2006-06-16 21:18:06 · answer #1 · answered by Velken 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a incest victim myself I will tell you that it will take you time to heal and then you will come to a place that you will be able to forgive your abuser. This will not be easy.
My advice for you is to take it one day at a time and start writting in a journal about your feeling and anything that you are feeling about this.
Believe me this will help you get it out and not keep it bottle up inside you it will not help you by keeping all of yours inside.
When the time is write write a letter and forgive the person who did this to you but this is for you to heal and not for the person who did this to you.
In my case it was my dad who molested me when I was 7 and went on through a long time. I did forgive him but believe you will not forget it but you will be able to live a normal life and help others too in the long run.
2006-06-17 04:40:21 · answer #2 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you cannot make anyone understand something like that. And, in my opinion, anyone who might tell you just to forgive and forget something like incest is not worth the thought process. And, any way, after being a victim of incest myself, I can honestly say, that now an adult of 38 years, I still don't understand it myself, and I've had 30 someodd to try too, there's no way to explain it to others
2006-06-16 21:44:14 · answer #3 · answered by 2cunfuzd 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need time to heal from such a tragic event. This is a topic most people find uncomfortable to discuss. It takes a lot of courage to open up to anyone about incest, therefore way to go for your bravery! These emotions you bare, you are entitled to feel. I would suggest you make an appointment with your family doctor to refer you to a therapist however to help you sort out this root to this bad emotional scar, and help you move on to a better and happier you, this is what you can do to be good to yourself, and it will help you out of this state of fog, or a lot of unanswered questions, you may still have.
Hope that's helpful.
2006-06-16 23:55:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well the best way to get over incest is to forgive the person but honestly! who can forget? forgiveness opens the door to healing yourself, you may feel the molester dont deserve forgiveness but GOD says if you dont forgive you wont get forgiveness. it also helps to see a counselor and talk things out. and realize that what happened to you is bad and unfortunate but..the person who did it to you is sick in the head and they need help not you. realize ,yes, it sux,it happened , but this person will not be allowed to control the rest of my life ,i am strong and can get past the hurt and pain.
2006-06-16 21:18:20 · answer #5 · answered by ***BUTTERFLY*** 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why do you feel the need to" make them understand"??? They never could....Not completely
2006-06-16 21:16:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
They can understand,forgive but cannot forgate.
2006-06-16 22:00:26 · answer #7 · answered by dank 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋