A woman working next to my husband's shop is flirting with him. Eating her lunch in our shop, constantly in a tearful mood asking my DH for advice about her loveless marriage. My DH says he doesn't feel anything for her, but it irritates me because of the way she acts when I'm around. She stands very close to him, asks him to get her coffee (which he does!), buys him lunch, and often I find her sitting in his chair. She acts too intimate and it's making me jealous. She's friendly with me but won't keep eye contact. I told my DH about how I feel but he says they're just friends. How do I get her to stop flirting, when my DH allows it?
2006-06-16 20:15:03 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't start a cat fight. Have an honest and serious conversation with your husband, tell him everything you've said here and have him turn it around and look at it as if you were in his position. Then ask him how he would feel. When he says he'd be upset, then point out that you are upset. Let him know that you're beginning to struggle with a trust issue and it's something he must help you with. Because honestly, this is not between you and the other woman, it's between you and your husband.
2006-06-17 02:29:28 · answer #1 · answered by kathy059 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Because he is blinding by her advances at him..and he sees it as nothing but friendship. As a woman you know that she is flirting with him, and to be quite honest she is just jealous of what you have with your husband, and I'll watch out for her...cuz if i didn't know any better she may be after ur man. Either way, whether she is, or is not...tell you husband that he needs to draw the line, and you feel uncomfortable with him so close to her and it makes you feel it goes alot deeper than just "friendship" and if she means nothing to him..then he wouldn't have a problem telling her to stay behind the counter in the shop...and when you are around take control and let her know that he is your man and to back the **** off...
Good Luck
2006-06-16 20:25:42 · answer #2 · answered by micheypoo 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men usually can't tell if another woman is flirting with them, especially if they don't like them. They're clueless when it comes to things like that (well okay some of them are).
If your husband says they're just friends, I'm sure they are; you shouldn't be jealous, though, because he's your husband and he would not do anything to hurt your feelings. Maybe you should talk to the woman yourself, tell her that it seems like she's flirting with your husband.
If she's having trouble with her own marriage, she should talk to her own husband about the problems they are having-the most important thing that keeps a relationship going (besides love) is communication, and it will fall apart if you do not communicate.
2006-06-16 20:31:24 · answer #3 · answered by poeticjustice 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is very tricky. My suggestion is to not put it on your husband to end it. When this woman comes round join in the conversation, when she's tearful about her Husband get her a tissue and sympathise with her. Become her best friend. It's a win win you are not the nagging wife to your husband, and she her advances are well in view. Eat some of the sandwich she buys and thank her profusely for being so kind to you (not your husband). Its better to be the I trust you dear..assuming you have no other problems, than to nag him to stop something he (poor unsuspecting guy) doesn't understand.
2006-06-16 20:37:11 · answer #4 · answered by cutesinglemom101 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Almost the same thing happened to me and I tried talking to her first and it didn't help so the next step I did I went to her husband and told him everything. After that she stayed away but needless to say my husband and I winded up getting a divorce a few years later * not over her* but guess who he is now married to . I didn't know it then but I found out years later they were having an affair but she didn't want to loose her hubby's money at the time.
Things worked out for me though I'm now married to a wonderful man and to make things even better her ex husband left her and married her best friend.
2006-06-16 20:40:10 · answer #5 · answered by joonam_21 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It just so happens that my husband is the only "thing" that I wouldn't share with anyone. If I had been in your place and this pain-in-the-rear woman was testing my patience, I would go up to her, smack her so hard on her face, it would leave prints for a lifetime, and tell her to keep her back off or she'd have to suffer my wrath! Where's the woman in you? Either you face it or you don't! Be strong, kick her buttocks off, and tell your husband off too! Tell him if some guy was flirting with you, how would he feel and what would he do...and maybe follow his example!
2006-06-16 20:31:07 · answer #6 · answered by love_charm05 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
my advice:
Find a guy friend to come around the shop and be friendly with YOU. Turn the tables around. When you are worried about your man, turn it around, focus the attention on you, and make HIM worry about YOU! I am going through a similar situation, except, it's my husbands x-wife and the mother of his child, and she uses her son as an excuse. This one's a hard one becuause I can't just ask him to stop seeing his own kid! Yeah.. your problem is much easier than mine. I don't know how to get out of this one. Good luck to ya!
2006-06-19 02:41:43 · answer #7 · answered by fmarqueda2005 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problem is your DH. This time is the woman next to your shop, next time it will be another woman. Your DH must not encourage them to be so close to him...
2006-06-16 21:33:09 · answer #8 · answered by Bigfoot 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to have a serious face to face talk with her. Tell her flat out how her behavior around your husband makes you feel. Don't sugar coat it at all - be honest, but not threatening or mean... unless she starts giving you attitude, then step up and tell her you're telling her this as a friend, this time and this time only.
Good Luck!!!
Aloha!
2006-06-16 20:24:54 · answer #9 · answered by gabriel_demus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the best thing i can say is to go to her in person and tell her exactly how you feel in a polite yet firm manner and let her know that her "flirtacious"ways are causing problems in your relationship and let her know that you think she is a nice person and while u r sure she means no harm it still bothers you and youd appreciate it if she would respect your wishes for her to stop. if tht doesnt work then go to your husband and tell him you have talked with her personally and you feel he needs to respect your feelings and he needs to make her stop immediatly if he wants to keep you as a wife.
2006-06-16 20:28:55 · answer #10 · answered by ***BUTTERFLY*** 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋