2 years ago he cheated on me, and while we were broken up, they were together. He realized he was wrong and missed me, and asked for my forgiveness. I forgave.
I was snooping in his e-mail, and came across, this brief conversation. After confronting him, he agreed that he made a mistake and should have never e-mailed her even if he was mad at me. He wrote her back saying he didn't want to speak to her again and changed his e-mail. She doesn't know where we live or anything. Its hard for me to trust him now, even though he says he'll never cheat on me again.
2006-06-16 14:44:24 · 4 answers · asked by Jessica 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
First of all, I am sorry you had to find a letter like that. The other thing I would like to say is, basically the once a cheater always a cheater is a very true statement.
The fact of the matter is, you don't trust him. Your instincts were telling you something was off and you snooped into his computer. I am not saying you are wrong at all, just that your radar is up. Honey, if there is no trust in the relationship, there is no relationship. You probably should not have considered going back out with him after he cheated on you in the first place.
When someone cheats, its almost impossible to win back trust. Even though you may have forgiven him, somewhere in your mind a little voice was telling you not to trust him. Those are your instincts. Unfortunately 80% of people choose to ignore these.
The other thing I would like to ask you, and I am not trying to criticize you, but why have you been engaged for 5 years?! This is telling me something. I have a feeling he is making the committment process very difficult. But I feel that there is cosmic energy around you telling you that this is not the right thing for you. I know this sounds weird, but sometimes the universe has its own way of telling us that situations are not right.
Girl, you deserve the best. You have lots of positive energy surrounding you. You have a great head on your shoulders and I am sure you have lots of friends. There is a guy out there for you that will love and be faithful to you. There is also a guy that will not take 5 yrs to marry your pretty little face!
If this guy truly was deeply in love with you, he would not be writing his stupid emails to his little ex girlfriend. He has no respect for you. He is like a lying dog. Your guy did not make a "mistake". A mistake is forgetting to buy laundry detergent. Your boyfriend in my book committed a crime. If he misses his ex girlfriend, let that jerk have her. You need to move on because he is hindering your life when you could be spending it with someone who totally loves your beautiful spirit.
I am not usually this harsh, but I am getting feelings off of him, and he is not the right one for you. The fact is that you will never trust him. And honey, he has done nothing to show you that he is trust worthy. In fact if you stay with him, you will look like a sucker. You need to take back the role of the strong woman that you used to be before you met him. Dump his sorry you know what. Your beautiful, so please move on.
I know that it is easier said than done, but you will feel like you have had a weight lifted off of your shoulders once you do what is right and listen to your heart.
Much love and best wishes for you girl. Love, Kat
2006-06-16 15:13:15 · answer #1 · answered by katisadiva 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You say that you don't think you will ever be able to trust him? If getting mad at you sends him to the arms of another then you may as well count on a repeat... I for one have yet to see a relationship where two people don't have an argument or two at least every other week or so... And one getting mad at the other. some people are able to discuss the situation and find some sort of common ground... It appears that your relationship should combine communication when a situation gets the better of your relationship other wise he may again seek the comfort of someone else. And if you continue to accept his mistakes for cheating on you then accept him for whom he is and his mistakes and live happily ever after. Some relationships can withstand one mistake of cheating regardless of the reason but, multiple times is not acceptible and there comes a time when one needs to persue other avenues...
2006-06-16 22:02:26 · answer #2 · answered by alex3537087 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That just means that he plans on never getting caught again... Now that he know you are a snoop he will hide things even better.........
2006-06-16 21:53:19 · answer #3 · answered by MC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a cheater to me. Once a cheater,always a cheater. I would leave him alone if I were you.
2006-06-16 21:55:33 · answer #4 · answered by sweetstuff 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋