Why does Coke make me have to pee so much more than tea does??

Answer 1

Because the diabolical megabucks conglomerate Coca Cola corporation knows if you pee more, then you'll drink more.

So they have many evil genius mad scientists who slave day and night, make arcane encantations to unholy dark lords, and barter with extraterrestrials and beings from warped dimensions to produce additives which they add to cauldrons of bubbling Coke while dancing naked and teasing poor teenagers with acne for the sole purposes of making you pee more so you'll drink more Coca-Cola.

Now, if you want to know why you're always thirsty right after you finish a Coke, well.................

Answer 2

They're both diuretics. Perhaps you're drinking more Coke than tea?