Please give me your opinion on this?

Question

My husband cheated on me with someone he met on a movie set. He's the only man I've been with.I moved out.He wants me back.I don't. I will never be able to trust.While we were together he put me down for not being experienced in bed.Since he was my 1st.I have a great job, look good and have a good education. This guy at work wants to go out with me.He's been waiting for 6 months for me while I got my life together.My 4 year old daughter loves him.He takes time with her to get to know her.I like him a lot.He is really smart and sweet and patient.I really want to give him a chance.But there is alot of drama in my life(you'll know if you read my other posts). And I also feel scared to go out w/this new guy because I lack confidence when it comes to men.I feel like I will get hurt again. He is really good looking, maybe more good looking than my husband & a lot of girls at work like him. I feel like I may not be able to satisfy him and that I will lose the great friendship we have.

Answer 1

sweetie let's get one thing straight, your husband is a retard. no, leave him, put amnesia in that part of your memory. husband is out! forever and ever. if this new guy is someone that your daughter loves, and mind you the child just always seems to like the best guy in all the chick flicks, is really sweet and is sought after many girls but chose you then why not? i understand that you just fear being cheated on and the verbal abuse again but if he's as good and as polite and as sweet as you say he is, he certainly won't be like your husband... ex-husband?
yes, well anyway. you should be telling this awesome guy your problems and see what he thinks. again, if he's all those things you mentioned he'll probably understand and "protect" you! isn't that great? ;D

Answer 2

Sounds like you have alot going on but I believe that you have the answer in your heart, and I believe that jumping from one relationship to the next right away just is not the solution.
May I suggest you do some deep soul searching within YOURSELF! Take some time for deep meditation. Love making comes strictly from the heart first of all,
if the feeling is not there then it WILL SHOW, so be unafraid to show YOUR TRUE SELF, hold your head up high and dont be shy!

Also Please know that we OWN NO ONE, your husbands desire to experience true love lead him to seek elsewhere, yet it is the responsibility of husband and wife to communicate about the performance in the room may it be good or bad and the wants & desires each feel, then I know that the love making skills will improve! You see, men and women have forgotten to communicate on this very important subject, leading to many running astray from the one person they once loved so much!

None of us are perfect, Just as long as we can learn from our mistakes.
I honestly would suggest that you do indeed make an effort to work things out with your husband!
Just Dont Walk Away For His One Mistake...

~+~+~+~+~+~+ ;o) +~+~+~+~+~+

Answer 3

Never feel like you can't satisfy someone, b/c you can. If there were no women on this earth, half of the men would go crazy. Women are what makes the men weak. If a guy sees an attractive woman, what does he do? He tries to holler at her. If a woman sees a nice looking man, what happens? We compliment the way he looks, and say "I know his fine a** has a woman, so I'm not going to waste my time.

Answer 4

Going out with him does not make sex automatic and right away. Get to know him better and when you care for him enough and he is still sweet and patient, you will not worry so much. You're husband was a dog, but if he is sincere about never cheating again AND you love him, marriage counseling may help you rebuild the trust.

Answer 5

I think if your husband cheated on you and obviously doesn't respect you, it's ok for you to move on.

Take proper time to get to know the new one and get counselling before getting too serious with anyone, just to make sure you're dealing well with all the emotional turmoil and that you're not unconsciously choosing the wrong kind of guy, or making a rebound decision. Counselling would be good for your daughter too.

Answer 6

Hey Girl ,

Take your time and find yourself first. Abusive relationships can leave scars that take time to heal. This new guy sounds nice but keep it friends. Guys are a dime a dozen and one's that are keepers will wait for you . If he can't wait for you to feel Ok with yourself then he was not the right guy for you to start with. BE careful of the good looking ones ! The Average Joe's will treat you like the Queen that you are !!
Best Of Luck

Answer 7

If this man is as nice as you say he is, he's not going to care. Actually, what you need to do is tell him exactly what you told us. Yes, it will be hard. Yes, you will blush. Yes, he might have a weird reaction, but with all that aside, it's good to know that you're able to have a relationship where nothing, whether it be feelings or thoughts, are hidden. My boyfriend and I always make sure we are open with each other, that way nothing gets confused. Good luck. I hope everything turns out okay.

Answer 8

Hi,

my ex-husband did the same thing to me, he cheated, I did the same thing you did.

At 6 mons I still wasn't ready for another man, thought I was but I was still to negative about men in general.

If you're ready for a new relationship than go for it, but if you're not just let him know you're not, tell him you just want to stay his friend. If he is really interested in you he'll wait til your ready, and then you'll have a friend and a lover (bonus).

If he's there for you during all your drama and sees you at your best and your worst and still wants to have a deeper relationship with you than extra bonus.

Wait til you're ready don't let him or anyone else push you into something you're not ready for.

Answer 9

Wow. Good for you for not going back to the ex, it would be a BAAAADDDD move! There is always a risk of losing a friend when you enter into a new relationship. It sounds to me like perhaps you should continue to take it slow, you are still mending. He deserves to get all of you, no drama, and you deserve to be happy with yourself first. I didn't get back together with my now husband a couple of years ago because I needed to be good to myself first. I was no good for him until I was and now am, good enough for me. Your daughter deserves that too. Take time for yourself, if he truly likes you and wants to be with you he will be patient. Oh, and by the way, screw your ex for criticizing your bedroom abilities. He doesn't deserve you, that's apparent. Don't let one insecure jerk make you feel like you aren't good enough.

Answer 10

Believe me, whether he thinks your good in bed (or not) will not effect your friendship unless he's got personal hang ups. He's a man. BTW, we all cheat or think of cheating. The male beast is not monogomous by nature. As for your ex bad mouthing your performance in bed....shame on him. Didn't he have nads to show you what he wanted? I guess not. You sound hot and that's probably why he wants you back. But that trust issue is tough. Can't get around it? The relationship is over.