I have known this guy for about 2yrs. we really didnt become friends until this past spring. I had a party, and that night he found out I was gay. it was after that night we started hanging out a LOT and have gotten very close. One day we were at the pool and he started asking me all these questions about being gay. we have gotten a lot closer since the pool incidence, and i am almost certain that he has given me little hints or clues that he may like me, or at least be curious about being gay. He had a girlfriend, of 2 yrs. and broke up. they just recently got back together and I have really started to like him and i really want to tell him how i feel and see if there is a mutual feeling. The biggest kicker is the 2 of us are going to his condo next week for 5 days. i really want to tell him how i feel. but dont want to ruin anything from happening. Do i tell him before we go? while there? or not at all?
2006-06-16 07:54:26 · 28 answers · asked by water_man_99 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
No, do not tell him. strght friend crushes will go....value your friendship, revealing this to him could end it or make it very uncomfortable....give it time, most "strght" friends can figure it out themselves...and will make light of it and still remain friends, but never reveal it yourself..it can become intimidating.
2006-06-16 07:59:40 · answer #1 · answered by Wheels 5 · 1⤊ 2⤋
Well my feeling is if you have already talked to him about being gay, he knows you are gay, and there is nothing wrong in saying you are really sad that he is not gay either! ...I think he would get the hint if you said it in the right way. In my mind if you have a good friend you should be able to say anything and it should never ruin your friendship. If he is not interested, he should say so politely and you should carry on where you left off. Saying nothing will only leave you frustrated and wondering.... I think if he is asking all these questions he is at least curious. So he should not be offended. I wish I could know the outcome! I wish you the very best of luck! Be brave!
2006-06-30 05:29:40 · answer #2 · answered by Modern Man 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you say something you are opening yourself up for regection, a lot of akwardness, and possibly the loss of a friend.
If he has a girlfriend then I would say that it would be even more akward and less likely that anything good would come out of it.
I imagine there has been flirting, if you are so interested in this guy just increase the flirting and see how he responds, if there is any doubt about his interest then stop the flirting unless he starts it.
I have had crushes on several 'straight' guys who were really cool with me and even flirted back, but in the end nothing happened and they moved on with girls. It is like a gay guy loving the attention of a girl and flirting with her, even if she is a faghag who in love with him. I think that a lot of straight guys just love the attention the gay guy gives him... and more then likely thinks just like the gay guy does about the faghag. (sorry for the horrible word faghag) Which is something like "if I was straight/gay I would be soo into this person, but I am not so I will enjoy flirting."
Sometimes when someone knows they are not sexually excited by someone they think that it even gives a free pass to flirt.
SO my simple answer is NO... why does everyone want to talk everything out these days anyway?
2006-06-27 17:35:49 · answer #3 · answered by magebox 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
The one i went for worked ok. I am 21 he is 19 and married. But i tryed it anyways, beucase he was asking and hinting the same thing. So I tryed it one night when we were together and something happen (alcohol was involve), it made it a little wierd for a couple of days. It is all back to normal and he still hints around, he even tryed to pull my pants down the last time we drank ( I was sober, so it was funny). I would say for for it at the condo, hell have fun with it, I sure would. I have done it with another thinking of condo, lol (well this was a camping trip). I tryed it and he was so hard because i was rubbing him with my foot, he asked if i was gay ( I said no) and left him alone. I am sure if i would of said yes, well you get the pic. Oh ya I am still frenz with all of then to this day, and I have tryed with a few.
2006-06-29 22:35:20 · answer #4 · answered by native_guy_2003 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you've a crush on him? if so, do not rule out that possibly your "hoping" to make sure some thing there. it ought to ok be he has thoughts for you....yet likes the position the "friendship" is immediately away. Play it uncomplicated and sluggish....that way you'll understand for effective if that is going to artwork or no longer. The worst component will be to lose your friendship. Time is on your aspect. sturdy success!
2016-10-31 00:15:25 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the exact situation, but the guy is my best friend's cousin but also one of my good friends.However I have another problem i go to a private school and there is a small number of students, so everyone kinda knows you and news circle's around much faster and if something like this gets out it's going to be big and it's going to destroy my reputation and my family's.But even if he can be mature and understanding about it,I don't have a shot with him (not even like a one time thing) and believe me we spent hours on the phone with my best friend (his cousin) trying to find a solution.But on the other hand you could have a chance with him and I think you better take it because I know that I'm gonna regret doing nothing about it.For now I'm staying away from him and not calling him, and I think it's doing me good, because every time I'm around him a part of me that i try so hard to hide comes out(sensitive and panicky)& i don't like that because it makes me vulnerable and i always see myself as a non-believer in love, strong dude.So all I'm saying is try because life is boring without taking risks and accepting the consequenses, you have to live your life and not the other way around.
I SINCERLY HOPE IT WORKS OUT FOR YHE BEST.
2006-06-29 12:50:25 · answer #6 · answered by scorpion prince89 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
this works in movies- tell him that you can't be friends anymore because you would be around someone that you love but you can never have. if he gay, then he'll lean up and kiss you, break up with his girlfriend, and you will have wild, crazy sex in his condo. tell him before you go the condo. if it is just the 2 of you, and he gave you hints, then maybe he wants to starts an intimate relashonship with you. either he is gay, or he wants to experiment. it is normal to want to experiment with your sexuality with a friend that you are really close too.
2006-06-16 08:28:33 · answer #7 · answered by boricua82991 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I know that even if he has a girlfriend it does not mean he is not Gay.
If you think it is going to be an uncomfortable situation while you're both at the condo than ask him before going out there.
But be prepared that if you tell him before going or while at the condo he might react negatively and tell you off.
I thought there was a guy who was attracted to me and it turns out he was just being friendly.
If he is the kind of guy to be violent at the thought of you liking him than don't bother and find yourself another man that you know is gay.
"Never assume, always verify"
Best of luck to you and him if it turns out he likes you.
2006-06-16 08:02:12 · answer #8 · answered by Phoenix Reborn 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hhhmmm... ok... now this is a tuff one, cause you could risk losing your friend. In my opinion.... I feel that you should keep your mouth shut, and if its gonna happen, its gonna happen all on its own. Your friend is asking a lot of questions, so they are obviously showing interest in your lifestyle. Open the door, and stand back. It is up to them to walk through. That way... you don't look like or feel like a fool if things go bad, and they won't feel the pressure or awkward situation if its of their own free will.
2006-06-29 18:21:36 · answer #9 · answered by Myzz Undastood 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
No, I wouldn't tell him. This might affect your friendship and really put a damper on your trip. If something happens with you two then GREAT!!! But keep in mind that he is in a relationship. At least respect the relationship enough to not make a move on him. Good luck to you!!! : - )
2006-06-16 08:04:49 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
dont say anything he knows ur gay and he still wants to be alone with u at the condo i say go to the condo and let nature take its course if he wants u im sure u will find out then
2006-06-20 06:26:00 · answer #11 · answered by jon33888 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋