There are 5 ppl i consider as really close friends...and two of them celebrated thier b'days, one in Jan and the other in march... and for their bdays nobody was bothered to shop for them.... or so it seemed.... so i felt so bad and i made cards for them and told the others to sign and all but I find out later that four of them have indeed pooled in and got them gifts...one an i pod nano and the other a really expensive watch...thats why the were not bothered.....but they didnt tell me..and i dont know why...i've always tried to be there for them, done a lot of **** for them sacrificed my time, energy and everything, and the most humiliating thing was that i had made them cards...out of paper glitter and pens..I felt soo stupid.. are they really my friends?? Im sooo lost..i care a lot for them..but i feel so betrayed....And im not in any financial difficulties that i couldnt contribute..i dont know what to do....because the thing is they keep telling me Im a close friend of the theirs
2006-06-16 06:48:58 · 17 answers · asked by sarah 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
THe thing is this happened on two different occasions and the first time it hapened i was quite hurt and didnt know how toreact so I kept quiet and the it happened again...
2006-06-16 06:53:17 · update #1
hmm maybe they do not consider you a friend. Don't second guess their intentions. Invite them over for a brunch and get your feelings out in the open. Could be you are just misunderstanding what is going on.
Good luck!
G.G.
2006-06-16 06:54:12 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
so, tell the ones who pooled for the gifts that you felt singled out, and that they should have asked you to put in, it would have only saved everyone a few more bucks in the long run anyway, and if they dont have any "drama" problems with you, then theres no reason to leave you out.
you should have asked them what they were doing for the others birthdays, i wouldnt expect to spend more than 20 bucks on a gift for a friend for a birthday, and usually we dont get eachother anything at all, maybe buy them a few drinks on their birthday, or a cd if they're really close.
dont sweat it, next time you feel a gift is necessary, then YOU should start the pool, and have everyone contribute.
2006-06-16 13:55:34 · answer #2 · answered by sobrien 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think the best thing here if you really want a satisfactory answer is to really confront them yourself. You will never know the real reason why they would do this to you if you never speak up and confront them. And if they turn the cold shoulders to you and act real badly to your confrontation, then maybe they weren't really worth considered as friends at all. As bad as this may hurt, at least you know who your true friends are. COnfrontation also allows them to recognise your efforts and friendship you always give to them. But seeing this problem in their point of view, maybe perhaps you are doing too much? Relax... you don't have to waste effort in making glitter cards if no one is really going to appreciate them, you can just buy one from your nearest shop and try to get everyone to make a quick comment in there! But anyway... stop thinking and act now.
2006-06-16 14:00:29 · answer #3 · answered by Ally 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really are uspet with them then mabey u can find some new ones. But first talk w/them. See why they didn't ask you. Talk to them. You sseem to really like em. And don't wroory about the card thing. It was cute and thoughtful
2006-06-16 13:52:47 · answer #4 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think we should be careful while selecting friends, one must select through a self made criteria, as no one else knows what are his/her social norms & values. It's easy to go through backgrpund and past of every one whom one is choosing a friend. Then one must care for the slected friend(s) as well, because they have their own feelings and criteria. If you think they have crossed the limits then delet their names from your friends list, But it is much better to forgive them and tell/share with them your feelings, so tha they are careful in future.
2006-06-16 14:00:37 · answer #5 · answered by Bacha jee 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your gift is just as good as theirs, cause it came from you and you didn't share your gift with your friends, and if you feel that they are doing thing behind your back, it's because they are, these feelings or thoughts aren't coming out of no where, follow your instincts
2006-06-16 13:54:20 · answer #6 · answered by theodorais 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This sounds like a Kindergarden problem
2006-06-16 13:52:36 · answer #7 · answered by celine8388 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
friends are not supposed to be doing this to each other, u should let them know how stupid they made u feel.
2006-06-16 13:52:43 · answer #8 · answered by SeXyBaBe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think its such a big deal....talk to them about the situation
2006-06-16 13:53:30 · answer #9 · answered by boricua_chick_21 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask them what happened, if they are your good friends then they will explain, ive had **** happen to me before like this, and its usually all a misunderstanding.
2006-06-16 13:52:43 · answer #10 · answered by DanceChica03 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋