I was reading an email from a guy and he explained all the things he had been through. I was just in tears from reading all of it. I simply could not understand how one person could endure so much their whole life. My life has been fairly uneventful except for one really bad date I had. Why do some people seem to be magnets for hard times?
2006-06-16 04:11:01 · 15 answers · asked by Fantasy Girl 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I'm freshly divorced from a drug addict, so my answer may not be what you are looking for.
My drug addicted ex always presented himself as the victim in his life. Everything happened to him, through no fault of his own. He presented himself as a person who was trying so hard, but just had bad luck. Through all of my ranting and raving at him that he should grow up and change his life, and be responsible for himself, he never learned that he was his own problem.
One day, I decided that I'd made him MY problem long enough, and that I sounded like a hypocrite for telling him to do exactly what I myself should be doing. Change your life. The ex was the cause of all of my problems as long as I allowed him to be. I actually needed to grow up, and be responsible for myself, and quit allowing him to cause me grief.
Barring the truly unforseen circumstances, natural disasters, the death or illness of loved ones, things that you really can't control, we are all in charge of our own lives, and should be responsible for the consequences of our decisions.
Drive drunk, and you'll hurt yourself or someone else, so decide not to do that. Quit going to work, and you won't get paid, so don't do that. Have unprotected sex, and you'll get an std, so don't do that. Cheat on your spouse, they'll divorce you, so don't do that.
Right now, because of my attitude, I feel that people who whine about their horrid lives are usually people who are able to make wrong decisions by clouding over a very clear issue with excuses.
Like the person who says that they drove drunk because they didn't have a ride home. They knew that before they decided to drink. The person who says they cheated because they were drunk. Being drunk doesn't make a person promiscuos and prone to infidelity, they already are a promiscuous person prone to infidelity who happened to be drunk when they committed adultery. Everybody has a sob story. If the sob story is based on real tragedy like a plane crash, the holocaust, tsunamis, or cancer, then I feel for you.
If the sob story is based on blaming the world for their bad decisions, low moral character, lack of will power, lack of work ethic etc. then that's their problem, not yours, and outside of the good advice to change their lives, they deserve no sympathy.
I'm happy to hear that your life has been "uneventful". I'm sure that is because you are capable of making good decisions for yourself and you should take some pride in that. Hope you continue to choose well!
2006-06-16 04:48:57 · answer #1 · answered by niffer's mom 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your answer may lie in what you have described as your 'fairly uneventful' life; your perceptions of his trials may be skewed by the illusory and opaque view that the empathic pain which you feel for his suffering must be felt by him, as well...
But there is no answer, really,... at least not one that is not already a cliche.
A friend of mine once wrote:
"...there are moments that seem God-like in the bliss of knowing that I exist and all is right with the world; for one eternal moment. Then back to the mire, --- the drudgery of rolling the rock up the hill once more, twice more etc..."
I think that this allusion to the myth of Sisyphus aptly describes how most of us get through this thing we call LIFE....
But why some of us have larger rocks,... and steeper hills, is a question which I believe can only be answered by one who, having taken their last breath, has been released from the burden of having to roll their rock...
2006-06-16 12:45:56 · answer #2 · answered by Saint Christopher Walken 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I could be totally wrong, but here's my take on it...I used to not believe in reincarnation, but now I'm starting to believe to...You have some people who are just the sweetest people in the world, but they can't catch a break not NOTHIN!!! I think it's because of the person they were in the past life...For instance...Hitler..We all know how bad he was..There's someone really sweet person out there that's ALWAYS going through bad times...That could be Hitler in the current life...I know that sounds crazy, but there's GOT to be an explanation as to why these people have it so tough...You ever seen someone who treats people badly, but everything seems to always work in their favor??? When they die and come back, some innocent person is gonna have to pay for that...I know it's not right, but I think that's just the way of the universe...
2006-06-16 04:17:29 · answer #3 · answered by mesofemme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is not hard or smooth...
it depends on the way it is taken...
Even I had tough times.. I was thrown away from the family at the age of 17.. I had no friends to help me.. no job.. no money.. I had nothing when I left my home.. I even thought that was the end..
I didnt get food to eat for more than 7 days.. I thought that was the end..
But still I managed to smile on that time...
If I recollect the times I had in the past.. I really get real Laugh !!!
It was fun...
- Jin
2006-06-16 04:20:01 · answer #4 · answered by Jin 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Life is hard because all of us want more and more and there is so much competition around almost for everything. Right from the day you take birth(in some cases even to take birth) you start competing for almost everything.
The two pillars are of greed and limited resources.
2006-06-16 04:19:14 · answer #5 · answered by masku darling 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The choices we make determine the outcome of the situations...My life was fairly good while growing up...but then I chose to be w/someone that I didn't want to be w/ in the 1st place...now at the age of 27 y.o. I'm a single mom w/ 2 boys...because ex-husband couldn't be faithful...like my dad said..."you chose him"...
2006-06-16 04:21:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wish I knew the answer to this one. I don't think we'll get this along with many other questions answered until we die though. Maybe it has something to do with "compassion" ??? Hard to tell. People say "life is what you make it" or "life is all about choices" ---- I HATE those sayings because they aren't necessarily true. They may be true for the people saying them but otherwise, nope
2006-06-16 04:16:39 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
In life there will be good and bad times but it's up to us how we take it. Some of us go more through bad times than good times and some more good times than bad. All those things the we go throug in life makes us grow to be a better person. It's up to the person to make the right choices in life we choose our destiny.
2006-06-16 04:25:22 · answer #8 · answered by Love28 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Some people are just glutten for punishment. Take a look at my life I'm married and my life is horrible. I'm not allowed to go anywhere with anyone. Anytime I want to go places with people he always tells me no. I don't have a life.
2006-06-16 04:25:03 · answer #9 · answered by Just wandering 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think people are given what they can endure in life. Hardships build character and make you stronger. You just have to always keep a positive outlook.
2006-06-16 04:16:46 · answer #10 · answered by AsianPersuasion :) 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋